So, now that I have your attention, take a minute to read my profile. Maybe all the way to the bottom.
I'm Nicholas -- Searching from Pole to Pole for Mrs. Claus
No "Ho, ho, ho" until we find each other. Really hoping you are actually out there. So where in the universe are you?? Please get in touch as soon as possible. Call h o m e ...
Phone: (USA) 801-562-xxxx
Yahoo IM: r_u_my_mrsclaus
I'll say up front, I'm looking for one in a million, a rare and very special sort of woman. My best friend ever. You have rock-solid faith in me, my vision, my path. And vice versa. A partner in the truest sense -- in love, in life, in our thinking, in mathematical logic and implementation, in business, in travel, in leisure and recreation, in intimacy and sex, in everything you can think of! True love overriding all else -- has to be.
(Didja notice I mentioned "math"? Boo!)
If anyone reading this knows of any possible Mrs. Claus prospect, please, please connect us. Tell her to write me. I'll be extremely grateful for your good deed.
Why is my profile so long and detailed? The answer is, I've given much thought to it over many years. Pairing up with anyone short of what I'm specifically seeking would likely be a colossal disaster, a really major train wreck, for both of us. No kidding. Way better, in that case, for me to simply stay single, date a bit, do the occasional elf, for the coming decade or so. Yes, lonely. But far safer.
As you will see, I'm VERY particular, about many, many things. Perhaps to an extreme.
If you are not a serious Mrs. Claus candidate or know someone who is (particularly with respect to advanced mathematics)... please proceed onto the next guy in line. No doubt you consider yourself a nice person and all, but I simply don't have the time and energy. Sorry. Also, please don't write me complaining about my profile -- I've gotten hundreds of such letters already, heard it all before.
If you do decide to write me, please tell me why you feel we are a match, how we can be in sync, complement each other, and form a good team.
Why is it critically important to choose the best possible partner available? First, we are living in historically crazy times. Technology is changing so rapidly. Dealing with this torrent successfully is an advanced skill. Easy to get lost in the jumble. Two good minds working together are better than one. Second, societies are crumbling. The US has been mostly unscathed so far. But that's going to change. Jobs and accumulated assets can disappear in a flash. Great aptitude will be required to navigate the mounting maelstrom. Finally, at our age we only have a decade or so of really good years left, then the torment of declining health accelerates. Horrible to be alone through this. A solid well-matched partner is absolutely the way to go, from now, clear to the end.
So..., moving forward, I am Nicholas As in Saint Nicholas. As in Santa Claus. If you don't believe, perhaps just play along... but, of course, far, far better to believe. I'm as "real" as it gets.
If one word describes me it is 'cerebral.' Constantly questioning, exploring, figuring out, making sense of this or that. From micro to macro, tiny to tremendous. And trying to make sense of the rest -- what an f*ing crazy world we live in.
My background includes lots of global travel, US Peace Corps (Philippines '79-'83), teaching economics and English overseas (Philippines, Taiwan), backpacking and motorcycling through China, Thailand, India, Greece, Europe, extensive economics study (master's degree+, Ohio State University Ph.D. program), Third World development, philosophy, sociology, the arts, chess, computers, thousands of programs across the spectrum, enjoyable encounters with hundreds of women, and, of course, the stock market.
My life consists of examining and interpreting the economy in a broad sense, and analyzing/trading securities (primarily stocks and options). Buy low, sell higher, short-term, based on complex mathematical systems I have been developing (1 + 1... plus 1 more -- the Holy Trinity. The optimal combination is like the unlock code to the bank vault). I work from my quiet study, work only for myself with my personal account, and like calling all the shots.
Experience and knowledge are cumulative. While much is lost with time, more is accreted. As a result, I tend to think and operate at the 'graduate level' of life. I don't suffer fools kindly, and have limited compassion for much of humanity. The old tale of the three blind men and the elephant is how I view most people -- pfffff, no, not just a spear, not just a wall, not just a tree trunk. You, Mrs. Claus, perceive the bigger story as well.
I am generally critical of politics, institutions, society, human behavior. Not liberal, nor conservative. Prefer we keep a distance from the outside world, so that we can do as we please. Reclusive. Elitist.
Although I am presently in Utah, I have no interest remaining here. And, by the way, I'm not Mormon. (Nice people, though.)
Together we will decide where on Planet Earth to reside. We'll combine our 'ideal criteria' lists, and plan accordingly. Tentatively, from Seattle to Vancouver, Switzerland, Australia, etc.
Bucket List item: A single trade, timeframe 8 days or less, resulting in gain of more than $1 million.
If we find each other we, together, will probably make many, many millions. You'll need to be able to handle that with a level head, equanimity, stability. (A lot harder than it might seem.)
Within a relatively short time of learning the ropes, Mrs. Claus will be able to confidently and successfully execute a million-dollar securities trade, according to the system(s) we've established. This is crucial. Pull the trigger. At exactly the right opportunity. Both of us will regularly be doing that.
Mrs. Claus shares my VISION. And the framework for realizing it. We will make a terrific team.
My place is a cozy cocoon of multiple computers, many monitors, white boards, shelves, desks, books, graphs, charts, stuff... all often suffused with Internet-streaming Classical music from Switzerland, J.S.Bach (God) considered way best, but also enjoy Handel, Beethoven, Mozart (Wolfie), Vivaldi, Tchaikovsky (Pete), Scarlatti, Chopin (Fred), Dvorák, Rachmaninoff, Satie, and so many more. Love the sound of a rich, full concert grand. The predominant sound, though, is silence -- total, absolute silence -- I generally wear top-of-the-line industrial-quality ear muffs.
I want to reiterate the importance I place on the study of ECONOMICS, all aspects across society, and back in time, all definitions and concepts, all tools used in such study. Economics is what I live and breathe, and reflects who I am more than anything else. (Mrs. Claus is, of course, highly synchronous with this.)
I'm intelligent, questioning, interested.
My income source (i.e., the market) is abundant, and portable. I can live anywhere in this wide world that I choose. My base income is from a semi-retirement annuity. All additional income is acquired through active on-line trading, with everything that entails. No thrill on earth I've so far experienced beats my position spiking in value exactly as I was anticipating. Definitely a rush.
You should take particular note: I do not have a regular job. I've never had one. And it's highly doubtful that I ever will. Please understand the implications of this. Think about it. Then think again.
Repeat: Aside from trading..., I don't work. So, it's exceedingly important for me to find a terrific woman that appreciates this, and is capable of and eager to assist in this endeavor.
Divorced in June 2002. Judge 'bifurcated' -- granted divorce, but asset settlement still remains unresolved.
I was married to a medical doctor (psychiatrist with added fellowship specialization) for 20 years, and helped establish her successful practices in the various places we've lived (Philippines, Taiwan, Ohio, Indiana, Utah). We have one daughter, a truly exemplary individual, highly educated in the best schools, and is now doing graduate studies at Stanford. Our family has always had golden retrievers as pets, plus all sorts of other animals. In Indiana we had a huge home with plenty of wooded land on a large private lake. Pretty close to ideal. Except for one thing....
....My wife and I were, quite frankly, NEVER on the same page throughout our marriage, with little doubt a bad match. When our daughter grew old enough, my wife decided it was time to split. We divorced in 2001.
MY GOAL AND VISION:
So..., with the above paragraphs in mind, here's my goal and vision of the true Mrs. Claus: we really understand each other, we have great chemistry, friendship, short-term and long-term partnership, companionship, fellowship, connection, open and honest communication, commitment, loyalty, soul buddies, synergy, journey travel mates, and most assuredly Santa's better half. Mrs. Claus is quite the amazing woman... for ME, to say the least. No doubt one in a million. The love of my life. For the rest of my days.
Mrs. Claus ideally has these characteristics:
1 --- Top-tier mind. Similar to my own. You are smarter than just about anyone you know. IQ at least 150 or equivalent (if no MENSA, Triple Nine, Mega, Prometheus, etc., card), and firing on all cylinders, particularly with respect to logic and mathematics. Disciplined. Rigorous. Focused. Yet flexible and adaptable in the use of your mental powers. Your intelligence is of the utmost importance to me. Without it there's no point continuing to read this profile. I'm totally serious. Just stop now.
Why? Why do I insist a woman with lesser intelligence stop here, and move on? Well, she will be miserable with me, and I with her. In nearly any interaction she will feel inferior, scrutinized, verbally abused, challenged beyond her ability. No meeting of minds, on nearly anything. No sharing of ideas. Almost no overlapping interests.
None of the above negatives would be the case with my Mrs. Claus. Quite the contrast.
2 --- Must appreciate deeply the nature of securities trading and economics fundamentals. Supply, demand, scarcity, externalities, business cycles, trends, etc. Exceptional listening skills. Hear what I say. Ask when you don't understand. Learn, learn, learn. Be my crucial sounding board. You will have an integral role in my (our) trading, both in developing strategies, and in executing the system. We'll be partners par excellence. I don't think I can do it alone. I want and need your help.
3 --- Prefer you have working knowledge in math software SAS, Mathematica, Stata, R, Excel, and a programming language, F#, Haskel, Python. Very familiar with and comfortable using (Windows) computers: operating system, software, and hardware. No hesitations. Familiarity, of course, with the underlying core subjects, like statistics, calculus, geometry, algebra, etc. Logic. Mind maps. Anti-fragility.
4 --- Education at least Master's, preferably Ph.D., in mathematics, statistics, engineering, physics, the sciences (might consider a very bright MD again). In addition to the education, it means you've held positions requiring such, and have grown considerably through your various work.
5 --- Exceptional reading skills. Voracious reader, anything and everything. Have overcome the limitations of subvocalization. Able to hold intelligent conversations -- with me -- across the board: philosophy, religion, politics, world events, science, current this and that. Very good communication skills. Articulate. Excellent English, wide vocabulary. The Great Literature of history.
6 --- More Spiritual than Religious. Big Mind, Buddha nature, Outside-the-Box thinking. Eclectic. Has grasp of the cosmos and higher powers, and how to personally tap into those. Does not refer to God as "He," or "my Heavenly Father" -- in other words, you've graduated from the simplistic, childish notions you were taught by the Church. Do not think that "God" has your life plan all laid out. Appreciates that THIS LIFE is YOUR MOVIE -- YOU are the producer, director, lead actor. YOU must make the choices -- based on all the evidence you have been able to find. Understand, I'm not at all "agnostic" -- greater powers are definitely out there. The key is, how exactly to tap in.
7 --- Vast life experiences, and basically still undamaged by it all -- alone a very difficult feat. Life tends to chew most up. Able to discuss with partner almost any aspect of life, at length, analyzing, processing, arriving at educated tentative conclusions.
8 --- Height 5'4 to 5'7. It simply seems to work so much better for both of us. Walking, kissing, sex, etc.
Added note: I prefer short hair on women -- view long hair as a social imposition carrying significant functional burdens to women. Long hair is a horrible yoke that women everywhere should throw off.
9 --- Weight less than 160. Discipline. Respect for body and health, physical ability to do lots of things. Able to enjoy the next few decades together.
10 --- You must have positive net worth, clearly demonstrable. No pressing money issues. Last thing in the world I want to have to worry about.
11 --- Now comes the hardest one... Mrs. Claus must be able to tolerate and complement a rather ruthless, thoroughly elitist controlling despot of a certain hinterland kingdom -- public face cheery and jolly -- ho, ho, ho -- but beneath the veneer a rather cold, calculating czar (silent c, by the way).
Hmm. What else....
-- You play the piano.
-- You can beat me at chess, at least once in a while.
And guess what, gal? This is merely the START. Ultimately it's crucial that we be on the "same page" about pretty much everything. I'm looking for optimal dovetailing. It's that important to me. I refuse to settle for less. We are travel partners in this LIFE journey -- the trip will require extreme coordination, cooperation, intimate understanding and agreement.
You have to fit in with me pretty much just as I am. Unlikely that I'll be changing. (Except, that is, in aging -- I can already feel it catching up on me.)
If after reading my profile you want to run the other way, please do. Sooner the better.
If we can manage a match, though, I feel strongly that the sky's the limit to what will happen. Interesting and affluent times ahead.
Addendum Regarding My Criteria List:
Okay, I've received seven zillion complaints about my list above. Gee whiz, ladies, lighten up some. Let's be clear, it's just a LIST. Like, brainstorming, ya know?. Come on... I recognize that it's impossible that ALL mentioned criteria will be found in any "REAL" woman. Mrs. Claus IS definitely one single real-life person. Not a simple sum of specifications. YOUR particular totality is what really matters. Right? Of course....
In defense of my criteria, though, all I'm asking the Universe for is ONE very, very special woman. Just one.
In this profile I might come off as "Santa Superman." Well, I definitely have many potential negatives -- in addition to my PERSONALITY. Here are just a few top ones that could turn you off big time:
a. I have SLEEP APNEA. While sleeping I'm attached to a mask and breathing tube -- one reason I don't let any elves stay overnight.
b. After considering a lot of evidence, I am somewhat RACIST -- Asians are the smartest on the planet, Blacks the least (on average, by our Western standards). I view this as fact, not simply opinion. Most will, of course, hold it against me. Blacks permeating America is the greatest mistake this nation has ever made, shackle and ball now tightly attached to our feet, how ironic. China has already eclipsed the US in total world trade, and will soon become the largest economy, with clear blue skies ahead. Asia will eventually dominate the planet, without any question.
c. My income above in right sidebar is an outrageously massive bald-faced exaggeration/lie. At least for the time being. Don't you be anticipating NO SUGAR DADDY in me, lady. In fact, YOU better have money for both of us, just in case my stock trading doesn't pan out as planned. At least initially I may be relying on YOU having an income stream or savings to get us through the transition of setting up home together, and until trading positively manifests.
z. Particularly since divorce, I have been wrestling with depression. Life seems a lot darker, colder, more alien. My attitudes definitely tending toward pessimism, cynicism, pointlessness. Well..., thank goodness for meds, is all I can say. Hopefully being together with you, and making a fortune, will boost me toward a far happier condition.
Why do I feel it's crucial to state my/our (potential) income? It's because such high income will mean various life changes, most likely. And challenges. Sort of a different world when you have most of your needs and wants adequately taken care of. You have to be able to handle wealth and all that accompanies it. Carry on with life. Understand the bigger picture. Continue moving forward, steadfastly, in our partnership.
If the description of who I am in this ENTIRE nearly-endless profile genuinely resonates with you -- in your heart, mind, soul, gut -- and the mentioned criteria more or less matches who you are, we should definitely get in touch. Let's explore each other a lot further and perhaps take this to the next level.
I have faith that you -- My Mrs. Claus -- will understand where I'm coming from. Everything I've written above will make sense, every word. That by itself sets you apart.
Sincere and warmest regards.
Yahoo IM: r_u_my_mrsclaus
P.S. -- Some women write me thinking that my profile may be some grand joke, and they ask what I'm really up to here. Well, let me be completely clear -- this profile and everything I say is 100% NOT a joke. I'm deadly serious. Do not write me unless YOU are as well.
Homeland. Terrific series.
Movies I've enjoyed: Spy Games, Redford and Pitt. Princess Bride is a classic -- "As you wish..." Recent ones, Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, Dark Knight Rises, Killer Joe (whoa!).
Don't care for TV except Charlie Rose and a little CNN.
Music mentioned in profile above. Bottom line, J.S.Bach.
Food, healthful, yogurt, nuts, fresh juices. I'm not a food fan.
Okay, well, contact me if:
Most importantly, if you are truly a first-rate "Mrs. Claus" candidate completely serious about applying for the position. I'd really love to hear from you. Please re-read my entire profile above and determine if you actually qualify. If not..., best of luck to you, carry on with your life.
Secondly, if you know of any Mrs. Claus possibility, give her a big Christmas present by getting the two of us together. Tell her I'd like to make contact.