35Seattle, United States
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My self-summary
However it may seem in the meandering words below, I'm really just that weird dude with a cat.

I aspire to craft this as a self-portrait in words. Strong human connection lives far more within compatible means of expression than it does in a comparative analysis of details.

Life is defined by shared experiences. I would rather go through hell with others, to find triumph on the other side, than live a quiet life of comfort on my own. I would rather live on the roller coaster, moving forward, than to spin aimlessly on the carousel.

I will be more turned on by a five hour meandering conversation on the Fermi Paradox, FiveThirtyEight’s latest forecast, film theory, sex/gender politics, sociopolitical philosophy, your favorite Star Trek character, and the prospects of this year’s Seahawks, than I will from seeing you naked (not to minimize the effect of the latter.)

I owe much of who I am to the influence of powerful women, people of color, and those who live far outside of traditional sexual or gender binaries. I try to be vigilantly aware of my own privilege, though I am far from perfect. I am interested in using my inherent abilities to take advantage of that privilege in such a way as to try strip its very existence away.

I have been found on stages and screens, behind cameras, in writers’ rooms, jumping from an airplane, in the middle of a play party, dressed in costume at conventions, selling shirts to a Kennedy, or embarked on cross country adventures. I have run off to Mexico with someone I first met two weeks before. I have taken on ambitious projects and succeeded and failed miserably. Tell me your stories.

I generally avoid labels, but am shades of: poly, kinky, liberal, sex-positive, feminist, nerdy, artistic, and intellectual. I try to stay actively involved with Rain City TNG, CSPC, and NSPP, if those acronyms mean anything to you. My FL handle is TheElegantKoala.
What I’m doing with my life
I believe in big, loose, long-term dreams, and specific short-term goals based more on opportunity than planning. Ask me where I’ll be in five years, I’ll tell you, “wherever I go.”

I work for a not-for-profit where I believe I can play a key role in ensuring its survival to continue the essential social services it provides far into the future. I have become obsessed with analysis and spreadsheets lately. If you're talking to me, and I start getting too excited about VLOOKUPs and nested COUNTIFs, feel free to tap me on the forehead or something.

Theatre and film-making have followed me around all my life. I got a degree in it. It's not something I'm working in right now, but it always seems to come back and find me every now and then.

Though I probably will bus to our date to minimize that sexy sweaty disheveled look, I now get most places via my wonderful bicycle.

As for those big, loose goals, I believe that bringing more love, empathy, compassion, acceptance, and equality of opportunity into the world is integral to the future positive existence of humanity. We must evolve ourselves in order to thrive. I'd like to have an impact on this.

I look at change in the world from the perspective of a Slytherin. Love is the goal, but power is the means, and power is not always pretty.
I’m really good at
Talking too much, but also listening as soon as I shut up.


Writing letters.

Perceiving pattern and connection, usually accurately. I am better at seeing how to make all the puzzle pieces fit together than I am at the detailed minutia of each piece.

Passionately making a case for that vision I have perceived.

Stubbornly looking for solutions well past the point I should have given up.

Keeping calm.

Staying genuine. I abhor pretense.

Oh, and I can say the alphabet backwards... really fast.
The first things people usually notice about me
I assume they notice I’m somewhat tall and, like every other guy in Seattle, have a beard.

I hope that I come off as approachable and kind, and sure of who I am.

I suppose, if I’m honest, I also hope you find me handsome, fascinating, and intelligent.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
BOOKS: In literature, I tend more towards plays: Long Day's Journey Into Night, The Glass Menagerie, Death of a Salesman, Twelfth Night, A Midsummer Night's Dream, Tartuffe, Dr. Faustus, A Raisin in the Sun, A Doll's House, and many more.

I've also been known to be a scifi/fantasy nerd. Highlights include LOTR, The Name of the Wind, American Gods, Song of Ice and Fire series, Wheel of Time, Way of Kings, Anathem, and Supersad True Love story. I love books on science and history as well... A Brief History of Time or 1491, for instance.

MOVIES: LOTR, Moonrise Kingdom, Cloud Atlas, Synecdoche, NY, There Will be Blood, No Country for Old Men, Fight Club, The Road, Crash, Babel, The Lives of Others, Pan's Labyrinth, Good Will Hunting, Hook, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, One Hour Photo, Donnie Darko, Safety not Guaranteed, Casablanca, The Matrix, Pulp Fiction, Schindler's List, Gladiator, Shawshank Redemption, The Dark Knight, The Fifth Element, Adaptation, all Star Trek movies. I’m a cinephile. I could easily keep going.

SHOWS: House of Cards, Manhattan, Continuum, Walking Dead, The Daily Show. The Wire is on Amazon Prime now. I think I’ll finally watch it. Want to join me?

Historically, any Star Trek series, the re-booted Battlestar Galactica, Breaking Bad, Fringe. I had a Stargate SG1 guilty-pleasure addiction for a while.

MUSIC: I love music, but it's difficult for me to define my taste by genre or artist.

Put on a decent pair of headphones, and listen to Beethoven's 7th Symphony as loud as is comfortable in total darkness. Drown into the sound and you'll find yourself enveloped in a full sensory experience. I find beauty in the thought that the soul of Beethoven (or any other creator of beautiful music) is immortalized within, and while you listen, a little piece of his soul lives within you. The more I can feel that soul in music, the more I appreciate it. Genre is irrelevant.

FOODS: I love good food, will try just about anything, and enjoy just about any cuisine you can think of. I also really enjoy cooking, especially for others.

With all of the above, I find I simply have a taste for intensity.
Six things I could never do without
Creative and intellectual stimulation.
Kitties. I have a big, sweet, orange one.
Someone to think out loud with.
True human connection via touch, words, thought, and emotion.
Good food.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
On a typical Friday night I am
On a date, game night, at a movie, unwinding at home with Netflix and my cat. Doing something completely different that I couldn't possibly predict here.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I think the deeper, more sacred aspects of the self are unutterable. They are the feelings, thoughts, and desires, deep within the core of being, one cannot easily express. They may not be purposely hidden, but are very difficult to find. Another may discover them in moments of the deepest silence, when they and you are all that exist in the universe, and you are locked into an embrace of body, mind and soul. You may just find a moment of profound clarity in the essence of each other.

I have experienced lighter moments in the connection I feel listening to Beethoven's moonlight or staring into Van Gogh's stars. I feel it in the purr of a baby kitten in my hand or the tears of a close friend in mourning. I feel it in performance.

Those rarest moments, however, are something far deeper. They allow us to access what I believe is the deepest magic of the universe. Such a moment connects us with the whole of everything at a level which we cannot attain alone. What many define as God, or spirituality, lives inside that magic.

I spent much of my life urgently in search of such a moment. When I found one, I quickly realized my urgency had long been my greatest impediment. I am now in no hurry, and am also not afraid.
You should message me if
More than anything, if you read this and feel an affinity and resonance.
The beauty of the universe has ever made you cry.
You can match my intensity.
You're not afraid to ask for what you want.
Passion, honesty, and openness define you, even when it hurts.
You're compassionate, empathetic, thoughtful, and also strong.
You seek a symbiotic partner, not a power game. Save the power play for the bedroom.
You’re not afraid to be sexually adventurous and explore, but also understand the critical nature of consent.

You're poly, or open to it, and don't buy into a hierarchical model.

I am usually more strongly attracted to femininity, I also don’t believe sexual orientation and gender are necessarily tied to the shape and function of your genitalia.

You are willing to go down a road of discovery with me. I wish to fill my life those who aspire to constantly grow and make their mark in the interest of improving humanity. I am not interested in apathy, cynicism, intolerance, closed-mindedness, or blind idealism.

Tell me what resonates or tell me a story. Give me content and I'll try to return the favor. I may take minutes or months. I may simply not be interested. Call me a coward if you wish, but directly rejecting people is emotionally draining. I read and greatly appreciate every message I receive. Live in the radical honesty of now.
The two of us