29Redmond, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
I've lived here in the great North West for most of my life. I play guitar, bass, and can mess around on the mandolin. I like reading, writing, movies, proggy music, and late night TV. Comedy is my favorite thing in the world. I have more stand-up albums on my Spotify account than I do music, which is saying something, because I love music.

I'm terrible at filling out profiles like this.

Hey nong man!
What I’m doing with my life
Working nights at UPS, watching MST3k, hammering out a psychedelic horror movie script, writing bad comedy sketches in a notebook I almost always have with me, listening to podcasts and refusing to live anywhere other than Washington State.
I’m really good at
I'm good at my job, holding in farts on the bus, forgetting which of the hundreds of vaguely similar horror movies on Netflix and Hulu I've already seen. Also, I fired a crossbow while at a fair ten years ago and I was really, really good at it.
The first things people usually notice about me
My beard is in perpetual need of a trim.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
In the interest of time, I'll keep these lists short. They could be very, very long.

Books: A Song of Ice and Fire, Hyperion by Dan Simmons, World War Z, The Sandman series by Neil Gaiman, Arthur C. Clarke's stuff, Isaac Asimov's stuff, God's Debris, the Hero with a Thousand Faces, Picture of Dorian Gray

Movies: The Mad Max series (excluding Beyond Thunderdome), Flash Gordon, 2001: Space Odyssey, Stranger than Fiction, Children of Men, Princess Mononoke, Star Wars (the good ones, anyways)

Shows: Daily Show, Nightly Show, Game of Thrones, Better Caul Saul, Louie, Freaks and Geeks, Futurama, COMMUNITY, Arrested Development, Silicon Valley

Music: Neil Young, Yes, King Crimson, Led Zeppelin, St. Vincent, Radiohead

Food: Anything that's gluten free (for real medical reasons)
Six things I could never do without
1) Comedy, humor, jokes, improv.
2) Rotational velocity?
3) Futurama and Community.
4) Sitting on a bench, in the shade, while I listen to You Made it Weird with Pete Holmes or Call Chelsea Peretti and giggling like a lunatic and drinking orange-ade
5) Sunlight.
6) Zelda
I spend a lot of time thinking about
-There are more connections between the neurons of one brain than there are stars in the milky way. That means that any human being's brain is more complex than the galaxy we live in. Now, consider that there are 7 billion human beings living today. In total, there have been 107 billion human beings, living or dead. That's 107 billion galaxies that have wandered the face of this ball of dirt and rock we call the Earth.
-The atoms that make up our bodies and the observable world around us are 99.9% empty space. You are, effectively, not there.
-A photon will not behave like a particle unless it is being observed. Seriously. Light behaves differently when you're not watching. IT SEEMS TO KNOW WHEN IT'S BEING WATCHED. The fact that we aren't doing backflips and tearing our hair out thinking about this right now is ridiculous.
-The universe doesn't make sense. It is as fascinating as it is infuriatingly confusing.

-Whatever the hell gender means. I'm biologically wired as a heterosexual male, but I don't necessarily understand or identify with any labels.

-Nikola Tesla was a neat guy.
On a typical Friday night I am
Working. Maybe getting stoned and seeing a movie with friends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm fanboat vigilante J. W. Stilwater.

I think Voyager is the best Star Trek.

Also, I'm schizotypal, which sounds worse than it is. It means I'm kind of a hard shelled, quiet person and I say and think strange things. But that's as bad as it gets. I can still be warm and affectionate. I just don't get the beats of conversation sometimes. If I were born 500 years ago I would have an awesome job living in a cave and saying cryptic things to adventurers in exchange for pelts or pot plants.
You should message me if
If you want to? I really dig women that take the lead in social situations. Definitely message me if you understood the J. W. Stilwater reference.
The two of us