July 1st, 2017
Lately I’ve been wondering about self esteem. I have a friend in San Diego who’s very attractive. I’m not talking about the fact that she’s smart, funny, and kind. I mean she has most of the physical qualities our society has deemed attractive: She’s pretty, thin, proportional, youthful, etc. Unlike the majority of my friends (some who didn’t win the genetic lottery) she appears to genuinely believe people won’t be attracted to her. How does this happen? Why does her mirror not reflect reality?
I’ve also been wondering about this profile. I mean, let’s be real... An endless glob of text that’s been going on for 6 years is probably the worst thing I could write to get a date. But what if these random writings show the true me? If a picture is worth a thousand words, does it work in reverse? As of today, I’ve written 3072 words. Boom! Math! That’s three more pictures than the rest of you and hot damn I'm looking good! ;-)
April 2nd, 2017
Have you ever written a dating mini blog? It’s something that’s really easy to NOT do. Thus my absence for over a year. But at least one friend of mine would argue that dating is even easier to NOT do. She continually laments about the guys on-line and men she meets in person. Too short, too bald, too young, too from another city… She says she'd rather give up. Is this common for you ladies or is she crazy?
In my absence from this blog many things have happened… One is that I’ve started a business! It’s exciting. And it’s scary. Do you think those are different sides of the same emotion? Here’s another question: Does a person’s job affect what you think of them? Maybe a better question is, why does it affect what you think of them?
December 5th, 2015
The subject of age and dating recently came up again. When you think about it, profiles like the ones on OKC, Tinder, and all the others are, at first glance, just a picture and a number. Does that number affect your opinion? One of my guy friends says it does. He thinks when most women see guys our age they immediately say NOPE! and move on. Of course in the real world it’s common for him, I, and most men I know to date younger women. Maybe that happens because we’re so damn old! ;-)
And now I’d like to revisit a recurring entry in my mini blog. I call it “Dumb things I’ve said to women”. To save you from reading all the way waaaay waaaaayyy down to the original entry, here’s the gist: In this blog I sometimes quote strange things women have said to me. To make things fair I started quoting dumb things I've written, and I take them out of context so they sound as awful as possible.
Dumb things I've said to women - episode 5:
“I better send you a dick pic before you decide to date someone else.“
October 2nd, 2015
Wow… It’s been while since I’ve added to this mini blog. Was I too busy with OKC dates to keep up? No. Was I wondering if anyone read my ramblings? No comment :-) But just because I haven’t written in a while doesn’t mean there aren’t dating stories to divulge!
In the real world, I met a lovely gal at a dog park earlier this year and we dated until an amicable split. After, she began seeing a friend I introduced her to. They seem good together. That makes me smile.
In the online world, I was recently scolded! A women contacted me and, after a few messages, she finally read my profile. After reading she said I’ve been on OKC too long, I’m not funny, and she didn’t like that I date around. Um… Did I say like dating around? That made me confused.
What's going on in your world? Are you enjoying my tales of the good, bad and bizarre? Do you have tales of your own? If either are true, you might like a Facebook group called “Not Ok, Cupid”. Many of the posts are funny. Unlike me ;-)
March 3rd, 2014
I've given a girl I know the nickname "horrible". She is currently dating a guy who's 5'7" and 140 lbs. That's smaller than average but, since she's 5'2" and 120, it should be OK right? Wrong. His size makes her feel fat. She says she wants to be with him, so you'd think she'd learn to accept him the way he is. Nope. She's making him bulk up with steroids. When he protested by asking "Aren't steroids toxic and really harmful to your health?" she replied "These are the least toxic ones available. Just take them!" Now do you understand why I nicknamed her Horrible?
Dumb things I've said to women - episode 4:
"Gross! Call an escort service!"
March 3rd, 2014
The worst enemy of a mini blog could be boringness. In my case it's lazyness. Life throws lots of blogging fodder my way but, lately, instead of writing I just took a nap. No more! Today you're getting not one but TWO blog entries!
Late last year a good friend said to me "Steve, I feel like I need to be married. Will you marry me?" Uh... OK, what the hell. Facebook status updated and somehow she felt better. About a week later I visited a friend who blurted out "Steve, let's get married!" then jumped up to give me a leg wrapping hug. This girl had three boyfriends but OK, what the hell. Another week went by and another friend decided she didn't want to be left out. "Steve, can I be you wife too?" Might as well pile the crazy a little higher... Of course these "marriages" didn't last, but I'm wondering why did they start in the first place? I'm pretty sure it's not my new cologne. Have you ever felt like you needed to be married? If so, how come?
December 10th, 2013
Is almost Christmas! Santa said he's going to get me a membership to E-Harmony this year. And by Santa I mean a friend of mine. Have you ever used E-Harm? What did you think? I was in a consumer study about dating websites once and E-Harm was the sponsor (which I didn't know at the time). In short, they were trying to see how people felt about an algorithm picking someone for them. Everyone was, in a word, skeptical. I'm pretty sure they didn't need to give a dozen guys $100 each to learn that. How about you ladies? Would any of you want an algorithm to pick your next date?
September 28th, 2013
Dating can be strange sometimes... Years ago I met a wonderful girl on-line. We didn't date at that time, but we stayed friends and began dating recently. As you might expect, when we started she only wanted to see me occasionally. After a month or so she said she couldn't see me at all until the next year. A few weeks after that she wanted to take me to Vegas for the weekend. Shortly after that she said we would never work out, but she still wanted me to call her daily and see her as much as possible. A couple more weeks and she told me she was going to go out with someone she had been e-mailing on OKC. That same day she told me she knew she was going to like this yet unknown guy so I had better convince her not to see him. They saw each other a few times, it didn't work out, and now she wants to see me again.
And on that note I think we should have another episode of...
Dumb things I've said to women - episode 3:
"I know nothing but booze and bra."
September 18th, 2013
Big news dating blog followers! After exchanging a bunch of messages with a gal I asked her to meet for a drink. She replied with an enthusiastic "Yes please and when?!" Then she sent me her schedule, I picked a place, and logged on to tell her the deets. Except I couldn't because her profile was deactivated. That's odd... Must have been a glitch in some OKC algorithm ;-)
August 25th, 2013
Dumb things I've said to women - Episode 2:
"Are you my arch nemesis?"
August 4th, 2013
In this blog I occasionally quote things women have written me. Things they probably shouldn't have said if they wanted a reply. Today I thought I'd turn the tables and post something I've written. And I'll take it out of context with no explanation so it sounds as bad as possible.
Dumb things I've said to women - Episode 1:
"My pubes are out of control. Can you shave them for me?"
July 11th, 2013
"You sound like a douche bag!" This is what a close friend thought when she read my profile. It was good to hear. Of course she went on to say I'm not a douche bag in real life. Much the opposite, but apparently that doesn't come across. Another gal friend suggested I remove a couple pics. In one I was shirtless and a girl was drinking from a straw by my crotch. I'll admit, it was douche-ish. But it was funny and the same gal admitted I looked hot. The other pic wasn't douche-ish. She said it just wasn't a good pic of me and I agreed that I should say douche douche douche douche douche in this paragraph as many times as possible ;-)
May 30th, 2013
Did you see my new pics? It was about time for an update. And apparently it was a good update since I've heard "Snap! You're handsome!" And "Gosh you're pretty" after adding them. I'm not sure pretty is the best compliment for a guy but it was still a sweet thing to say. Most of the new pics are from a recent trip to Las Vegas. That place always strikes me as odd... Sort of like if aliens abducted you and created a simulated city so they could study you in your natural environment. Close, but somehow not right.
April 16th, 2013
OK Cupid DOs and DO NOTs:
If you're not feeling well and can't go on the date you have planned, DO NOT give your phone to a friend and ask them to politely cancel/reschedule for you via text. This will result in your message not being received due to an incorrect phone number. After you correct the phone number issue, this will also result in a ridiculous picture of you in a two piece, green velvet outfit being sent to your former date.
If you've been messaging someone as friends but haven't met them yet, DO suggest that you meet for drinks when they tell you a close friend is visiting from out of town for the weekend. This will result in laughs and good conversation. This will also result in a meandering cab ride to a warehouse party where you can introduce them to other fun friends and keep them dancing until way past their bed time.
March 26th, 2013
Do you remember that song I Don't Want To Miss A Thing by Aerosmith? A classic buttrock ballad. When I heard it the other day it made me want to watch Armageddon, or as I like to call it "the most unrealistic movie ever made". I think a bunch of scientists from bizzaro world wrote that script. Still a fun flick though. I watched it and found myself laughing on cue and crying at a couple of the cheesy sad parts. But never mind that. You're here to read about OK Cupid and I have news! A date is near! This is becoming an annual tradition since my only other real OKC date was about this time last year. So as is traditional, wish me luck. Or ask and I'll tell you if the luck you wished me was good or bad!
January 22nd, 2013
This site never ceases to entertain in multiple ways. Just recently I got a message from a woman who couldn't believe I was on this site for 6 months before getting a date. And when I asked her why she thought that was, she wrote me a considered and honest reply. We'll see if that conversation continues but nice gal either way :-) On the other end of the spectrum I got a message from a woman who begged for a picture of my ass. I normally wouldn't quote a message directly but this chick seemed like the stalker type who's probably reading this right now and laughing about it. "I want a picture of your ass, since I was already looking forward to ogling it and I feel cheated. I'll totally send you a picture of my breasts for you to stare at. It will be just like a romantic first date, only just the staring at each others bits part and not much else. C'mon...pleeeeaase? I have really nice breasts! They're totally stare-worthy!" In her defense, she wrote about deeper subjects as well. What I really appreciated is that she made a genuine effort, even if it was a little… whatever you call that.
December 10th, 2012
My first hate mail! I never thought about on-line date hate before but somehow my profile really upset a girl. She made it very clear she would not want to be my wife because if she became paralyzed I wouldn't drive her to the hospital or help with the medical bills. She said a lot of other things too. "I think you're shallow" sums it up. Sorry! Do words make me a bad guy or was she having a bad day?
October 11th, 2012
It's my 1 year OK Cupid anniversary! Well, give or take a few weeks. I don't remember exactly when I signed up. How has it gone over the year? Here are the stats… I've met 4 women. Two were dates (one of which only lasted 5 minutes thank God), one recognized me at a club and said hi, one I met as friends and we're still friends after almost a year. I'm going to see her tomorrow as a matter of fact. I get a lot of e-mails I don't want just like everyone does I suppose. I've sent messages to 54 women total either initiating or replying. And I've seen 3 profiles that genuinely peaked my interest. One wrote me a very nice reply saying we weren't a match, one didn't write back at all, and one I haven't e-mailed yet even though I found her months ago. So what do you think? How does your last year compare?
August 3rd, 2012
I decided to stay in tonight. I'm about to watch an old movie called 12 Monkeys with Bruce Willis and Brad Pitt. I'd write more but I gotta go. Bruce is wearing a plastic suit, he just put a cockroach in a jar and now he's being attacked by a giant bear.
May 10th, 2012
Not much activity on OK Cupid lately... I did get a reply from a from a gal who said she didn't want to meet me because she was overwhelmed by the online dating process. She also said her Midwestern politeness compelled her to reply even though she wasn't interested. If she does that with everyone no wonder she's overwhelmed! How about you? Are you feeling overwhelmed? Perhaps from reading all my babbling? :-)
March 13th, 2012
It's my birthday! I had an epic 40th bash on Saturday with all my friends, international DJs, performance art and good times that went on until morning. You may have been there too. Did you see a guy in the VIP room wearing a tux? That was me. Did you see a guy wearing a t-shirt with red furry letters? That was me too :-) And... I've got my first ever OK Cupid date tomorrow. Wish me luck!
February 6th, 2012
Should I lie about my age? I ask this because a friend of mine who's on this site complained that she wasn't meeting the kind of guys she wanted. She subtracted a decade and seems to be having much better luck. What do you think? If she meets someone and they're both happy does the lie matter?
December 29th, 2011
Tomorrow I fly to LA for the weekend. Should be a great time! I'll be meeting up with a few friends and going to the NYE DDP (https://www.facebook.com/events/143652619074431/). I'm sure I'll have OK Cupid locals up and running on my iPhone so feel free to find me and say hi.
November 23rd, 2011
It's been 1 month since I joined OkCupid. How's it going? I've contacted 6 women and received 3 replies. Some of my messages were pretty lame so I don't blame you for not writing back :-) 17 women have contacted me and I've replied to 4 of them. I've also met two women in person - both on the same day. With one, we had planned to meet as friends. The other came to the same club and recognized me. Yes, it was kind of weird. Anyway, for now I'd say it's going less than OK, Cupid. Wanna send me a message and change that?
November 15th, 2011
My first log-in in a week and 6 new messages to welcome me. Not sure if that's a lot or a little but most don't say very much. Usually it's something like "you sound interesting" or "I like your profile". That's not much to go on… I don't need your life story but a little more would be nice :-) Have any of you been to http://blog.okcupid.com? All kinds of nerdy data about dating put into cool charts and graphs over there. I highly recommend it. Lastly, a note about friends. I like 'em! I started a conversation with a gal by saying I didn't think we'd get along dating and we've been chatting for a few weeks now. Looks like she could be a potential new friend. Maybe you could be too :-)