31Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
I'm great at appearing to be a well adjusted, fully functioning adult. Dry and sarcastic on the surface but in reality I'm filled with creamy nougat. I'm also a recovering college athlete.
What I’m doing with my life
Like every other male in Manhattan I work in finance. It keeps the lights on. My plan to be a pool shark didn't really work out because I suck at pool.
I’m really good at
Mario Kart, Scrabble, Bananagrams
The first things people usually notice about me
"Excuse me, sir? This is a TGI Fridays, please keep your pants on."
Six things I could never do without
1. Hendrick's
2. Baseball
3. Steak & Eggs
4. Ctrl + C, Alt + E-S-T
5. Tuxedos
6. Fios OnDemand

Not necessarily in that order.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
terribly irresponsible ways to spend a Mega Millions jackpot.

As background, I play the lottery a lot. Get on this gravy train now before it leaves the station.
On a typical Friday night I am
halfway through a bottle of whiskey.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
One time when I was a kid I was playing street hockey and broke one of Mr. Christensson's front windows. I blamed it on Andrew Pateri, my neighbor. The kid got grounded and had to do chores for like a week. 18 years later that still kind of keeps me up at night.
You should message me if
your profile does not contain the phrase "curled up on the couch" in any capacity or you are Anna Kendrick.
The two of us