36Broomfield, United States
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My self-summary
I just moved to Denver after living in Minnesota all my life. I've got a job now that makes me travel a lot so I'm gone and around the country. When I'm around, I'm looking for friends to do generic things with. Ice carving, dog sledding, snowball fights. You know. Summer things. Where the hell are all the lakes? Do you guys even go ice fishing?
What I’m doing with my life
Texting with my 14 year old nephew. For example:

Nephew: hey, so u know each box is $23.

Me: Box of what? Kittens?!

Me: Are they calico? Short haired or long haired?

Nephew: oh u must not have got the first txt. Im selling beef jerky for baseball again do im wondering if u wanted some. There r 5 flavors

Me: How many kittens per box? Do the come spayed and neutered? Do they have names already? I want to name one James. He's the shy one.

Nephew: theres 12 a box

Me: I'm going to get one of those carpeted towers for them to climb on. Maybe some string to chase. Ooh! Yarn!

Nephew: sounds like a good time

Me: You have no idea. I'm going to start a cat circus and charge people 3 dollars to see their antics. Just have to decide if it's going to be online or roadside.

Nephew: haha I suggest roadside but u gotta find a busy road

Me: Thats what I'm thinking. We make a good team. Ok, what do you think about those fruit stands that sell sweet corn. That's our Big Top!

Nephew: well....I think you should do it out of a bed of a pick up...

Me: A true traveling circus! Up and down the interstate, drumming up business as we go! Now we need a catchy name for it.

Nephew: well acro-cats is taken so idk


Nephew: Another cat circus...

Me: This is a goddamned blood feud now. Our circus is now called "Fuck the Acro-Cats We Shoot Cats From Cannons.". It will have to be a big sign.

Nephew: ha it will draw more attention

Me: Any press is good press. Put me down for one box of calico and one of teriyaki.

Nephew: k thx

Me: I'm going to go work on their intro music now. It has to be soft. Loud noises scare James.
I’m really good at
1. Dancing
2. Supporting my points in an argument/discussion
3. Changing my point of view if I've lost discussion or apologizing if I've lost an argument
3. Doing impressions of animals (chicken, dog, crow, monkey) for kids
4. Telling stories
5. Driving long distances
6. Getting any child or animal to play.
The first things people usually notice about me
How amazingly caucasian I am. How sweet my gams are in the moonlight. How I can eat my own weight in muskmelon.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Brandon Sanderson, Patrick Rothfus, Ken Follet, Stephen King, some fun non-fiction like Lincoln biographies or ...others, I guess. I love audible.com and I'm constantly listening to a book. "The Ethical Slut" is very good too.

Movies: Eternal Sunshine, Vanilla Sky, Dark Knight, Happy Accidents, Death at a Funeral, 500 Days of Summer, Brick, Inception (Joseph Gordon Levitt: Man Crush).

Shows: West Wing, Arrested Development, Community, Lost, Parks and Rec (I figured out that I'm a cross between Ron Swanson and Andy Dwyer - it seems to work for me), The Inbetweeners, Downton, Walking Dead, Adventure Time, lots and lots and all sorts...

Music: I love music, but I'm all over the place without finding one genre to call my own. Intelligent rap, classic RnB, folk, rock, classical, old school country.

Food: PUT IT IN MY MOUTH. I want to try everything. When I am in a restaurant, I have strategy I use when reading the menu. I just pick almost at random and close the menu. There aren't many things I find abhorrent so put it in front of me and let's give it a whirl!
Six things I could never do without
1. Stories (about you, about me, about history, about the future, about another land where music is currency and peanut butter is a time of day)
2. Deep talks about why we think the way we do and what it means
3. Netflix and Hulu
4. Audio books
5. My wife
6. My dog
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Social norms, social contracts, where I left my keys, how should I remodel my bathroom, what kind of parent I want to be, what I would do if I won the lottery, the statistics of winning the lottery, science, why I can't sing better if both my parents have good voices.

The way people hide from themselves and others, the character development that we all go through, the road blocks that we set up in our path to finding contentment. I think humans are exceptionally and perpetually fascinating.

I also think about sex and how ashamed we are of it. Sex, sexual desire and erotism are wonderful things that have been instilled in our minds to bring humiliation and degradation for admitting that we like it and desire it.

Sex shame is worthless and I will have no part in it.

Also, I write stories in-between songs during long drives.
On a typical Friday night I am
I just got done working for the weekend, I'm going to enjoy it, dammit! So making my dog chase the red laser pointer in the back yard.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I think I might have some measure of Face Blindness. If there is a version of Face Blindness for names, I also have that. Name Deafness?
You should message me if
- You need a date that will start the dance off right at a wedding
- You like making lists about yourself covering random topics like "My Top 10 Embarrassing Moments involving Horatio Sanz" or "My Top 5 Pet Names for Future Pets and Their Corresponding Genus," and "My Top 7 Single Digits and Why"
The two of us