37Toronto, Canada
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My self-summary
Hi OKC readers, trying to create the ideal profile is making me neurotic. Should I be sincere, or should I go the joke route ?

Oh wait, before I go any further I am ashamed for all the boorish dickheads around, plus they make it hard for all the non-creeper, non-boorish dickheads. While I'm at it I also apologize for the sport exhausts, backward hats and bare chested photos.

Anyways, since you are reading this you should probably know that there is a decently high chance I will see you in real life and there is a very, very high chance - unless you're a total recluse that is - that you will see or be seen by someone who's profile you've seen on here. I mean when I joined this site, I saw people on here I already knew!

I would say I spot one of you at about an average frequency of once every two weeks. Now, I have never, never approached one of you and said something as doltish as "Duh..Hey, I saw you on OKCupid", which would be kind of jarring, worlds colliding and all, especially if you are with other people and you don't want them to think you, desperate you, are whoring your sad self out on some sleazy website - but I kind of want to say..."Hey, Just Hi", so what we need is a sort of secret handshake or an ack-acka-dak.

That way we can cut the awkwardness when you without any warning come face to face with someone who you didn't plan to meet but who pictures you've seen and you know what job they have and if they like cats or did a masters or lived in Paris and who's favorite books and music you can rattle off.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm writing a Bollywood version of Glee, it's called Ghee.

I am also available to critique your profile and help you fix it so attract the right kind of person.

Rule 1) No matter what you look like choose your body type as "Curvy".

Rule 2) Avoid saying stuff like "I just want to meet someone and get it over with it".

Rule 3) When you list "The six things you can't live without" don't list "great sex". Do you know how much pressure that puts on a person ?
(Also don't list oxygen and water and shit like that, ok smartass).

Rule 4) Okay this one is real. Don't say only you want to date a certain race or a person of at least a certain height. It is just hopelessly shallow. If you are shallow don't advertise it.

Corollary to Rule 4) Don't list all the types of people you don't want to hear from. It just sets the wrong tone for a site where you are trying to meet people.

(...more rules to come ...)
I’m really good at
At times I am really good with connecting with people. I don't know if it's a Toronto thing or what, but we are used to being very abrupt, but a lot of people are reaching out and I try not to cut people off when I think they want a little airtime.

I will also name your business or write a headline:

Hip Hop car wash: Gz Up Hose Down
Vietnamese Resturant: Pho Shizzle
Obituary: Memento Maury. RIP Povitch
Exotic Dancing + Deli: Hot Sluts and Coldcuts
Rug store: Carpet Diem
The first things people usually notice about me
I resemble a sad muppet
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I dunno, I don't feel like listing a bunch of shit. All of us that are 25-35 and live downtown like a lot of the same stuff (Barbershop Quartets, playing the keytar, narwhal steaks, platypus on Sundays).
Six things I could never do without
Who knows ? What I had was lame and pretentious so I scrapped it.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I like chubby girls. Yay!
You should message me if
you make food taste better.

Also I am seeing someone. I am still happry to meet fellow foodies. My favorite places this year have been Big Crow, Farmhouse, Hole in the Wall and Home of the Brave. I love meeting fellow foodies for snacks and snack parades.

Cheers :)
The two of us