I paint from the diaphragm.
When I eat Chinese food, I use only one chopstick.
I was born with a sixth sense, so I donated my third to charity.
I do not understand how or why Keanu Reeves has an acting career.
I once built a canoe out of p.v.c. pipes and an old tarp.
I was not arrested for doing so.
As a matter of routine, I have none.
I bake well, and I'm man enough to admit it.
I have no inner circle but do have an outer rhomboid.
I would rather read about you than write about me.
I have been a magazine travel writer/photographer for decades.
Magazines, however, are becoming Dodo-fied. Relax, I'm a professional and can take such artistic license.
Though I suspect one more similar violation will get my license revoked.
I am now far more office-bound than I used to be because I am currently an associate editor of a magazine.
I am passionately, vociferously, egregiously honest, and I would like to meet a woman who would not use any of the following adverbs—sporadically, inconsistently, inadvertently—to describe her level of honesty. Of course, if she were dishonest, then she wouldn't use ... you get the idea.
I do not know why the caged bird sings, but I have a hunch.
In the sixth grade, I came in second in a pass-punt-and-kick competition, but as Muhammad Ali said, "It ain't bragging if you can do it."
I am exactly as tall as I claim to be, and exactly as bald as my pictures show me to be. I am, however, willing to reveal more about myself than I have in this self-summary but felt a need to be whimsical rather than heartfelt. Perhaps it was something I ate.
Writing, painting, taking photos, reading, staying active, learning to play the guitar, hoping Tiger never wins another Major (You Da Man, Jack!), wondering if a reality show about B-List Celebrities Playing Strip Poker to benefit narcoleptics would be a hit, and looking to meet a woman who is looking for something real.
Reading people's poker faces
Sussing out hypocrisy
Doling out compliments
Hatching Ponzi schemes
Baking lemon bars
Writing song lyrics
Not being swayed by online ads
Or tv ads
Or those in magazines and newspapers
Admiring creative efforts and applauding artistic successes
Not listing nearly enough books or movies in the list below
Barton Fink, Apocalypse Now, Crimes and Misdemeanors, The Jerk, Young Frankenstein, Million-Dollar Baby, Crash, Life is Beautiful, Blood Diamond, Chinatown, Do the Right Thing, Track 29, Annie Hall, The Devils, Sid and Nancy, Blood Simple, No Country for Old Men, The Stunt Man
Sports and Netflix.
The Beatles, The Stones, Blues, Jazz that is not played on The Wave, acoustic guitar
Travel (I survived without it for the last two years but only just)
Whether I choose to respond depends on many factors, none of which I am at liberty to display to the world of OK Cupid, per court order.