two legs in the afternoon,
and three legs in the evening?
I don't know, but I've trapped it in my bedroom. Send help. Please, send help.
I also really enjoy beer.
Bourbon is good too.
I have poor time management skills, but I'm rarely late.
I have only a few hobbies and writing fake Craigslist ads is one of them.
I set up a recurring haircut appointment every 4 weeks with the same stylist and I think to this date that is maybe the most adult thing I've ever done.
Slowly learning what "financial responsibility" is. That is, until the next shiny thing I HAVE TO FUCKING HAVE pops up on an Amazon Prime Lightning Deal.
I have two cats. I take a lot of pictures of them. A LOT. They are named after Pokémon.
I really, really hate puns. Fight me.
Struggling with bikes while sober.
Making poor impressions.
Abusing the quicksave/load feature.
(Alternatively, being bad at videogames.)
Being bad at most kinds of games.
Making jokes only I find funny.
Forgetting someone's name the second I stop talking to them.
Accidentally ending text messages with " b" instead of "."
I bought a copy of Atlas Shrugged for $2.99 at a thrift store. Way cheaper than buying firewood at a convenience store!
I don't like mushrooms, but I ate one recently and didn't hate it.
I've been known to watch a TV show or movie here and there.
Self deprecating humor.
My ability to count to six.
Why I don't use the word "hubris" more often.
Is peanut butter an addictive substance?
How I can abuse the power I'm given.
Did I use enough emojis in that last text?
Why Charizard and Gyarados aren't Dragon type, but Alola-form Exeggutor is ???????!?!?!?!!!
When society will ultimately collapse into pure dysfunction and chaos. Though I'm guessing the answer is 2016.
That thing I just did that I should've fucking done differently god dammit, fuck, I'm so goddamn stupid.
But if grabbing a beer with a little bundle of misanthropy wrapped in a thick blanket of sarcasm with a beard attached to it and discussing the finer points of things such as manual brewed coffee preparation, Pokémon, cats, bikes, Arrested Development, the Dark Tower series, etc sounds like something you're into, then say hi.