45Wenatchee, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Update: After 3 and a half fantastic years in Duluth, Minnesota I'm moving to the Wenatchee, Washington area for a new job. I've never been there and I don't know a single person there. It should be an interesting new adventure. It's exciting to pack up and move to a completely new place.
What I’m doing with my life
I am a Ph.D. research scientist. I work in the area of marine/aquatic biology...molecular microbiology in particular. So, I'm a doctor but not the kind of doctor that actually helps people. Heh. I also teach college students stuff and things.
I’m really good at
Eating stuff while watching stuff. Putting people at ease. Making other people laugh. Giving nicknames that stick. Public speaking/lecturing to a crowd/class. Making grilled cheese sandwiches. I also make a mean banana Nutella crepe. Reaching things off of high shelves. Sequencing your DNA. Bearhugging. Telling stories. Cringing when people say "I loves me some (random item/person), unless that person is an actual old blues musician. Trivial Pursuit. Doing the right thing. Tomfoolery. Porch sitting. Telling tall tales while keeping a straight face. Corn hole (not what you likely think it is.) Sensing the slightest human suffering. People watching and making up funny/ridiculous stories about what they are doing. Restraining myself when people use "orientated" or "supposably" as an actual word. Making lists of things I need to do and putting "make list of things to do" at top of list. I then get to immediately cross that off the list giving me a (fake) feeling of accomplishment. I'm good at making balloon animals. I'm also good at striking up conversations with total strangers. I can walk in to a room of strangers and make 9 out of 10 people laugh in a few short minutes.
The first things people usually notice about me
Hmmm....I'm not sure. My bear-like stature, perhaps. Or it might be that despite being from Tennessee, I don't have much of a southern accent. But, it does come out sometimes. Ya'll. Although, I nahver really tawk like the-yus, even whe-un ahm really slippin' into muh southern talkin'. I ain't shittin' ya.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
My favorite author is Mark Twain. Love it. I also really like Sarah Vowell, David Sedaris, Cormac McCarthy, James Thurber and Garrison Keillor, among others. Also, Calvin and Hobbes is a favorite. That counts as reading too, doesn't it? I love to read.

Movies: The Big Lebowski, Rushmore, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Slap Shot, Outlaw Josey Wales, High Plains Drifter, Raising Arizona, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, Oh Brother Where Art Thou?, Into the Wild

TV: Top Gear, The Office, 30 Rock, This Old House, Mythbusters, Entourage, Penn and Teller's Bullshit, Weeds, Deadwood, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Simpsons, The Daily Show, The Colbert Report, Californication, Real Time with Bill Maher, The Sopranos, Flight of the Conchords, Family Guy, Seinfeld, The Honeymooners, MASH, The Boondocks, The Ricky Gervais Show

Music: Explosions in the Sky, Foo Fighters, Alison Krauss, Dan Tyminski, Tony Rice, AC/DC, Van Halen, Level 42, The Police, Phoenix, Rush, The Decemberists, The Twilight Singers, Old Crow Medicine Show, Van Morrison, Allman Brothers, Blues Traveler, The Greencards, Journey, Boston, Dave Matthews, James Taylor, Brian Setzer, Stevie Wonder, Lyle Lovett, Zac Brown Band

Radio: A Prairie Home Companion, Car Talk, NPR.
Six things I could never do without
Something good to read.
A good laugh.
Some peace and quiet.
Something to look forward to.
Green grapes.
A scenic vista.
Sunblock. We Viking types aren't what you'd call good tanners.
Ok, so that's more than 6. Big whoop. OKCupid is not the boss of me.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Science stuff. How to make other people laugh. How lucky I am compared to so many. How to smite my enemies using only my mind bullets. Inventions, both wacky and practical. Politics. Hypocrisy. How when people obnoxiously go on and on about how they don't watch and don't even own a TV and wear that fact like a badge of honor it makes me want to punch them in the piehole. And by the way, if you watch Netflix on a computer that's basically the same thing as watching TV so get back down off of your high horse. What I would do if I won the lottery. How I always chuckle when I hear Minnesotans say "spendy" instead of "expensive." I just got back from a 5735 mile road trip to California and Oregon and back. Ten states, six National Parks and a whole lot of fun. You should have come along. Next year, I'm thinking Grand Canyon. Start planning now.
On a typical Friday night I am
Snappin' necks and cashin' checks.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I recently traded an old laptop to a budding, young 14 year old scientist for two bleached beaver skulls. That has to be the only time in recorded history such a trade has been made.

When I came back from visiting Tennessee for Christmas, I got back to my house at about 2:00 am. This was just after a recent big snowstorm. 2.5 feet of snow here on the ground. As I was driving back here, I knew that the snow removal guy had come to plow the driveway, but I also knew he doesn't typically remove the snow on the rather long 100 foot or so walkway that connects where I park my car with my front porch. Also, if I strained and squinted, I could just make out my (now useless) snow shovel way out on my front porch. Doh! So, I get out of my car and strap (some of) my stuff to my back. Then I climb up and over a 4.5 foot pile of snow and stomp my way to the house through the snow in the middle of the night. It was about -20 degrees with the wind chill. It took forever and my hands were getting too cold, I could tell. Legs getting tired....snow in boots...snow in places a person shouldn't have snow....snow everywhere...no St. Bernard with a little barrel of brandy to come and rescue me either...and the only thing that kept me going was the thought that the next day, I didn't want to be the reason for the newspaper headline: "Tennessee Jackass Freezes to Death 30 Feet From His Own Front Door. America's Freezer Claims Another Dimwitted Out-of-Towner, Smirks with Self-Satisfaction. Go Back to the South, You Hillbillies. Let His Frozen Corpse Be a Lesson to You." I couldn't have that. I have the reputation of an entire state to protect. So, I eventually made it. The house was a nice, warm 45 degrees. Felt great. I eventually unfroze after a few hours with the heat turned back up. heh heh heh. Wait, what was the question again?

I write and throw right handed but bat and golf left handed. Which is weird.

I could beat your sweet grandma in a pie baking contest and shit talk her while I do it.

I once got into a fistfight with a goose.

Also, I'm allergic to caribou. For real. This is my curse. Isn't that terrible?

I have never seen the movie Dirty Dancing.

I once danced with nine native girls on a stage on Easter Island. Did I mention I was wearing a grass skirt and a coconut bra?

I was once damn near killed by an empty bag of Pepperidge Farm Mint Milano cookies. Ask me how.

I really, really want to learn how to play the mandolin.

I love to let the big sneezes fly (when no one is around).

I'm from Nashville but I don't particularly like country music. I love bluegrass, though.
You should message me if
You should message me if you know of a great house for me to rent in the Wenatchee valley area.
Hey, why don't you introduce yourself by challenging me to a game of Words With Friends? My screen name is DrewReed42.
You should message me if you are constantly being mistaken for Lauren Graham or Tina Fey. You like to laugh and you like to make others laugh. You can use apostrophes appropriately. You should message me if you can appreciate the small things and like people that can do the same. You should message me if you like the occasional ridiculous conversation. You should message me if you have Garrison Keillor tickets. You should definitely message me if you are really smart. The smarter the better. In fact, if you are really, really smart, you should message me twice. You should message me if you wear cute Liz Lemonesque girl glasses. You should message me if you'd like to have your ass handed to you in a game of prison rules Scrabble. You should message me if you can spell on an adult level and can write clearly. You should message me if you can teach me how to play the mandolin. You should message me if you have a hilarious Minnesota accent. You should message me if you want to give me mandolin lessons. You should message me if you'd rather eat blueberry pancakes than sit in a church on Sunday mornings. You should message me if you have something interesting to say. You should message me because you just never know...you just never, ever know. Now how about that game of Words With Friends now? Hmm? Hmm?
The two of us