WendyfulLife
53 Los Angeles, United States
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WendyfulLife
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My self-summary
Smart, sassy, sweet, sapiosexual, sarcastic, short, silly, self-aware, salty, and a whole lot of things that don't begin with "s."

Note: if you haven't filled out your profile or answered any questions, please don't waste your time messaging me. I won't reply.

Also, for the record, "casual sex" for me does not mean a booty call at 2AM or just hooking up once, for the most part. It means I am open to the possibility of an ongoing relationship where sex is a major factor in conjunction with friendship/mutual affection (as opposed to a deep, emotional relationship). If you message me with something grossly crude or solely with a proposition, I will find Liam Neeson, he will find YOU, and he will hunt you down. You know he can.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a teacher. I often say that teaching isn't what I do; it's who I am.
I’m really good at
Cooking. I have a talent for taking an existing recipe and tinkering with it to make it my own so that it is quite often better than the original.
The first things people usually notice about me
My smile. My rack. My elegantly curved horns.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Authors- Alice Hoffman, John Irving, Colleen McCullough, JD Salinger, Christopher Golden, Stephen King, Kurt Vonnegut, Anita Shreve, Jennifer Weiner (I like chick lit, magical realism, and horror. Sue me)

Movies- My favorite weird genres are improbable romance (those that contain an element of magic and/or unlikelihood) and religious horror (especially fun, bad religious horror like The Seventh Sign). I love movies overall. Some longtime favs include Dirty Dancing, The Princess Bride, The Graduate, Young Frankenstein, The Final Destination franchise (except that last one; that one blew), The Faculty, Footloose, The Big Chill...really, anything with Kevin Kline, Up, How to Train Your Dragon, When Harry Met Sally, American Werewolf in London, Grosse Pointe Blank, Point Break, Love Actually, Zombieland, 500 Days of Summer, Easy A, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Red, Scott Pilgrim vs the World, Shaun of the Dead, Chef, About Time, and all three Sharknadoes (plural, like potatoes).

Music- Jack White, Ben Folds, James Taylor, John Mayer, Bree Sharp, Fountains of Wayne, Storm Large, Wilco, Rilo Kiley, Amanda Marshall, Sting, The Police, Barenaked Ladies, They Might Be Giants, Common Rotation, Daughtry, Rick Springfield, Sublime and yes, the occasional Barry Manilow. Don't judge me. ;-)

TV: Current - The Big Bang Theory, the new Hawaii 5-0, Top Chef, almost anything on Food Network, Mr Robot, Orange is the New Black, House of Cards, Broad City, Game of Thrones, American Horror Story, American Ninja Warrior, Roadies, Sleepy Hollow, iZombie, X-Files.

Past- The Wonder Years, Life Goes On, X-Files, Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip, Buffy, Angel, Firefly, Flight of the Conchords, Wonderfalls, Friends, Daria, Freaks and Geeks, Chuck, Entourage, Terriers, Fringe, The New Normal, Go On, The Following, The Office (American), How I Met Your Mother, Sons of Anarchy, Hello Ladies, The Newsroom, Glee, Phineas & Ferb.

Food- Beef, raw or cooked. Hash browns. Dunkin Donuts Iced Coffee. Sushi. Chicken tikka masala.
The six things I could never do without
Iced coffee in the morning.
Music to sing to in the shower.
Thick-cut, applewood smoked bacon.
The internet.
My super comfy bed.
My car, Penelope Pitstop
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Food. I love to cook and I sometimes write about food, so my social media feeds are basically just food porn & cats (very little overlap there, though, thank goodness ;).
On a typical Friday night I am
Chewing bubble gum & kicking asses...and I am usually out of bubblegum.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I really hate when people put "if I told you, it wouldn't be private" here. Like, it's a deal-breaker for me. Grow a pair, people (and that goes for women, too)!
You should message me if
You read my whole profile, we match fairly high, you aren't looking to just hook up once, you don't use chat speak, you are generally a positive happy person, you aren't allergic to cats, you like food and don't have any allergies or restrictions (glutards and vegans need not apply-sorry), you think sex and guilt have no place in the same sentence, you have a good sense of humor and a better sense of yourself, and you think we'd have fun together.

You should *not* message me if you don't have a picture in which your face is visible, if you are outside of my stated age range, if you mention God or the Bible in your profile, if you are allergic to cats, or if we match really low. I won't respond.
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