~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer
Are you insatiably curious, fascinated at every turn? Do you long to live authentically and make a real difference?
Simultaneously laid back and earnest, I believe in compassion, mindfulness, and integrity. I don’t, however, believe in boredom -- the world is too full of wonder, the value of stillness and emptiness too often underestimated.
I tend to see myself as a niche person, given that many of the things I'm drawn to attract a relatively limited audience -- my Zen practice, my passion for Sudbury schooling, and my taste in music, for instance. While I cherish solitude, I crave connection and a world-expanding partnership.
”Don't choose me because I am faithful,
Don't choose me because I am kind.
If your heart settles on me, I'm for the taking.
Take me for longing or leave me behind."
~ Alison Krauss
My self-care regimen consists of daily reading, journaling, and meditation, as well as regular exercise (typically, running up and down Shoal Creek three or four times a week). Singing classical choral music (mostly early and contemporary) has been a big part of my adult life, with two of my longest-running choirs being the Ars Nova Singers and Chorus Austin.
I used to play pub trivia every week, and once I very nearly published a couple children’s books. I work to maintain my fledgling Spanish, and I play my piano with varying frequency (though, sadly, my trumpet hasn't seen the light of day in years).
- playing with words
- playing/connecting with kids and animals
- making music
- logic games/puzzles (e.g., chess, Sudoku, Set) that challenge my nonverbal side
- communicating (e.g., listening, public speaking)
- "I see you as an attractive, fit, smart, introspective man, who will take risks but only after weighing the rewards against his values."
- earnest, peaceful soul
- "You make people feel safe."
- open, sincere
- "You are a beautiful, intelligent, charming, humorous, solid man."
- "You have this Stephen Colbert vibe."
- good hugger
- "You know what I like about you? You aren't afraid to say important things. You aren't afraid to skip the smalltalk."
"You've stayed positive, independent, active, passionate in the face of some disappointments and major transitions...I've known you to exhibit a lot of courage and inner strength when you felt scared and weak."
1. Anything by Wendell Berry or Haruki Murakami.
2. Favorite books include Pilgrim at Tinker Creek; An American Childhood; Walden; Letters to a Young Poet; Goedel, Escher, Bach; Gilead; Angle of Repose; Crossing to Safety; The Heart is a Lonely Hunter; Foreskin's Lament; The Lover's Dictionary; The Road; The Tao of Pooh; The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay; A Prayer for Owen Meany; Dune; and Ender's Game.
3. Other favorite writers include Jeanette Winterson, Kurt Vonnegut, David Sedaris, Bill McKibben, Sherman Alexie, Roald Dahl, Etgar Keret, Milan Kundera, Richard Bach, Barbara Kingsolver, Italo Calvino, J.R.R. Tolkien, William Least Heat-Moon, Jane Kenyon, Linda Pastan, E.E. Cummings, and Mary Oliver.
4. I'm also into spiritual/self-help writings by people like Pema Chodron, Bernie Glassman, Philip Kapleau, Steve Hagen, Byron Katie, Brené Brown, and Don Miguel Ruiz.
Lord of the Rings, Chicago, Rivers and Tides, Buena Vista Social Club, Being John Malkovich, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Lost in Translation, Memento, The Pirates of Penzance, Serenity, Groundhog Day, Stranger Than Fiction, movies featuring Christopher Guest (e.g., The Princess Bride, Spinal Tap, Best in Show), movies by Miyazaki and Tim Burton, and foreign films (e.g., The Motorcycle Diaries; Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon; City of God; The Triplets of Belleville), and various incarnations of Star Wars and Star Trek. As for TV, I don't really watch it; just select series on DVD/Netflix (e.g., Deadwood, Flight of the Conchords, Buffy, Battlestar Galactica, The Wire, OITNB) or that I own (Monty Python's Flying Circus, Firefly).
Classical, choral, piano, jazz, Celtic, bluegrass, Latin, and the otherwise eclectic and unclassifiable. The two best concerts I ever attended were The Tallis Scholars and Bobby McFerrin.
- capital-A Art in its many manifestations
- spending time with children and creative, thoughtful, child-like people
- the mindfulness of journaling and meditating
- quality time outdoors, whether hiking, exercising, or simply sitting
- quiet, empty stretches, whether alone or shared with a loved one
- corrective lenses
- a library card and access to a good collection (quality used bookstores, too)
- Internet access (though periods of intentional doing-without are also indispensable)
- …and breaking silly rules like limiting myself to only six things...
Although I'm a pretty skeptical person (in the agnostic/atheist/humanist sense), I also practice Zen on a daily basis. I find that I'm more grounded and healthy, more present, when I meditate frequently. So while I don't believe in the supernatural, I am deeply concerned with meaningfulness and ethics, and I appreciate that "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,/Than are dreamt of in your philosophy."
...you're ready for a close, genuine connection -- i.e., you're self-aware, know what you want, and have your stuff reasonably together.
...you'll inspire me to begin learning the guitar, improve my Spanish, and/or work on a new language.
...you enjoy games such as chess, Scrabble/WWF, and Set.
...you love reading aloud and being read to.
...you keep a journal.