34 Manhattan, United States
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My self-summary
I spent most of my career working for ad agencies (bonus points if you can name an ad agency without Googling it). After grad school, I started working for an online startup before venturing off on my own and starting a consultancy. When I'm not working, I enjoy exploring the city, watching football (Go Giants!), and cooking/eating (impossible to separate the two). I am a gadget-guy.
What I’m doing with my life
Digital marketing consultant by day and rescuing puppies from burning buildings by night.
I’m really good at
Like Tyrion, I drink and I know things, only taller and with less dragons. God, I wish I had the dragons.

- Finding the humor in any situation
- Cooking
- Useless trivia
The first things people usually notice about me
Is he wearing slippers?!?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
movies - Toy Story (best buddy movie ever), anything animated especially Pixar films, King Kong (the original '33 version and the '05 with Jack Black), Rollerball (the original with James Caan).
music - punk, old school rap, pop
food - I love food and eat everything. Well that's not entirely true, I do have a longstanding grudge with asparagus
The six things I could never do without
An ancient race of aliens that anally probes midwesterns
Bob Costas's crappy color commentary at every major sporting event
A benevolent army of grandmas chatting up strangers looking for dates for their granddaughters
Windows 10
Evolutionary changes that lead to the opposable digit we call thumb
The ability to use big words while making small talk
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Does the guy with the "Hoosier Daddy" username actually get dates?
Do 2nd generation clowns ever think "geez I've got some big shoes to fill" when they enter the family business?
I'd like to get a cat and name him Meow Zedong just for the joke.
My ex told me that she loved my monster cock, it took me over a week to realize that she was talking about my pet zombie rooster.
Do mimes make good silent partners?
On a typical Friday night I am
What's my MMORPG style? It's like the Greek economy, tanking.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
When I see bride/bridesmaid pics as profile pic I think, boy that marriage didn't last long.
You should message me if
You shouldn't message me if you're looking for somebody with a sense of humor. I'm not funny, painfully unfunny, accountant funny. I was funny once, back in 1997, by accident. It wasn't a joke, more of a malapropism. That's the last time I use a thescelosaurus to sound to smart.

Okay, just message me if you want to go on a Pokemon Go date. You shall be mine Charmander!!