- Friedrich Nietzsche
This has over the past few years become my motto in life. I love life sometimes; other times I just put up with it, like how you put up with a friend's irritating boyfriend/girlfriend as not to cause any more trouble than necessary. But for ever moment of hardship, we come out a little tougher than we used to be.
You're welcome to call me Katey, Kat, Comma, You-over-there-with-the-guitar, nerd girl, etc. Doesn't really matter. It's all cool.
I haven't been out of high school for long, I have been single for pretty much my entire life. I've struggled with my views on love since childhood and I'm still not sure of how I would define it at this point in my life. I've come to believe it's just one of those things in life that defies the bounds of vocabulary.
On the subject, I love my family, small as it may be, even if they do annoy me at times. I'm currently living with my brother, his wife, her mother, my two young nephews, and my younger niece. My family means more than anything in the world to me, since they're all I have. My nephews, though they're too young to realize it, have helped me through more in my life than anything else. I've lost a lot of family over the past decade, and through much of it they've been there to make me smile through the tears.
My mom died in late January 2009 and I had limited contact with my dad a few years after he and my mom separated, but over time you learn that grudges are a waste of energy you could be putting toward much more positive things. I've come to realize in recent times that hate isn't within my nature, and I no longer waste my time with grudges. My mom and I were extremely close; since my dad was never really around for either of us, we had each other to lean on, and that was pretty much it. We were sisters, best friends, just as much as we were parent and child, and it still hurts to think about her, to think about all that she's going to miss. I know that she's still here in spirit, however, and even though I'm not exactly what you'd call a religious person, I know she's looking out for me.
I'm a writer and a musician. Music speaks for me when words can't, and I am more comfortable writing than I am speaking. I am, to be honest, incredibly shy.
I'm also quite the nerd. Be forewarned of that. I play videogames, I play table-top RPG/strategy games, I'm very much into speculative fiction, I often ponder the possibility of life on other planets and if or when they're going to come here and take over the Earth, all that wonderful stuff. If you can't handle it, then please move along.
I'll almost definitely add more onto this as time goes by. I know this seems pretty full already, but I know I've probably left something out. No worries, it'll get put in eventually, and you can feel free to ask me anything you want to know. I might be shy in person, but I don't mind answering your questions. I'm one of the only people I know who really doesn't have much of anything to hide.
- Ray Bradbury
I'm following my dreams. I've wanted to be a writer since I could hold a pencil and had the vaguest understandings of sentence structure, and that's what's going to happen. At the current time I'm writing two novels, and the first draft of one is close to finished. From there it will go through editing and further drafting, and it will be sent off to an ungodly number of literary agents. This girl is sick of wasting her time doubting her work. This time around, I'm going to make something of myself.
Whenever I have the chance to get to college, I'd actually like to go for psychology more than I would for English, despite English being so closely related to the career I'm working toward at the moment. Considering realistic character development and interaction, psychology is actually pretty relevant in and of itself, not to mention a major in psychology can get you more places than a major in English.
I've been told that I'm an excellent writer, but I'm extremely critical of my own work. My forte is speculative fiction, horror in particular, and I do fanfiction just for the fun of it. Like I said before; I'm a nerd. Can't handle it, then don't bother.
Cooking. This is a new hobby I've come upon and I love it. You have to love cooking to be able to spend literally all day making homemade pasta without a pasta roller. I've also been told I fry up some pretty incredible chicken. My brother has stated before he's not sure what he's going to do when the family chef moves out.
Guitar. One of the few things I honestly feel semi-comfortable bragging about, though don't worry, I generally don't brag. I know there's always room for improvement, but guitar is different from writing or singing or anything like that--you know when you're good at it and when you're not, even if there is always room for improvement.
I've also been told that I'm good at singing, but I'm more critical of that than anything and I'm only just starting to get comfortable with singing in front of other people. I have a few acoustic covers on youtube, and I might send the links if you ask very nicely, but you have to catch me in a confident state of mind or I'll probably just go find a large rock to play turtle under.
- Oscar Wilde
Physically, my chest. Men and women alike. I come from a long line of large-chested women, on both my mom and dad's sides of the family. I'm not bragging. I'd personally get a reduction if I could afford it, since I can't stand people automatically assuming just from staring at my chest that I'm (a) dumb (b) a skank or (c) all of the above. I prefer to let people decide whether or not I'm dumb by actually speaking to them, and you can rest assured that I'm about as far as they come from being a "skank." And let's not forget the back problems and ridiculously overpriced bras/swimsuits. Oy.
Most remotely sociable and polite people will say the first thing they notice is my eyes. They're brown. I personally don't get what's spectacular about them, but I've been complimented on them before, so I'm not going to bother arguing.
Personality-wise, people will notice I'm shy, and often therefore assume I'm a bitch since I don't talk much. I'm really not--I can get along with almost anyone, you just have to tease me enough to get me to come out of my shell. Once I have, people tend to notice that I'm pretty eccentric in the humor area--it's a family thing, you'd understand if you met my brother and probably end up thinking of me as slightly more normal by comparison. They also notice as they get to know me later that my self esteem isn't really up to par, but I'm not one of the mope-around, "Oooooh I'm ugly and it sucks and I'll never find love boo-hoo-hoo" types. I may not think highly of myself, but I also don't really care. I sort of accept my low opinions of myself with a grain of salt. I doubt that makes any sense. Ah, well.
- John Green
I like horror! This goes for books and movies, not music and food. I've never seen any horror food, myself. Well, unless you count some of the stuff Andrew Zimmern gets into, but I honestly don't count it, since in the area of food, I'll try anything once.
Books, I love some Stephen King. I'm also into fantasy. I've never finished the Lord of the Rings series, but I do enjoy J.R.R. Tolkien, no less. I'm a Harry Potter junkie, and I love J.K. Rowling as a writer--as I've reread and reread the books, I've found that I'm actually more fond of the intricacies of the side-stories and minor characters/enemies than I am of the main storyline and the trio, but that's what I love about J.K. Rowling--she takes the time to plan EVERYTHING about her books, and as a writer myself, I find that highly influential. One of my favorite books doesn't really fit into those genres, but I love it for its psychological aspects nonetheless--Fight Club is one of the single most amazing novels I have ever read, and would highly recommend it to anyone interested in psychology, sociology, or making homemade explosives.
My favorite series of all time, however, is the Hitchhiker's Guide series. The movie was a CRIME AGAINST ALL THAT IS GOOD IN THE WORLD. It probably madne Douglas Adams roll over in his grave. I mean, the only thing they got right was that Arthur was an Englishman who was fond of his tea. They had to go and turn Ford into a gay black guy rather than a slightly mad ginger. Marvin was decent. Zaphod's personality was close to right, but they still got him wrong. Don't even get me started on Trillian. Okay, don't even get me started on this rant, since I don't want to rant. I'd rather commend Douglas Adams for being a simply amazing author and one of my major influences in my voice as a writer. His satirical tone throughout the books, his insight, he was both a genius and a comical genius. I hate that he's dead now, since I would kill for a chance to meet him and discuss writing. Or philosopy. Or pretty much anything. He just seems like he would have been an all-around awesome guy.
Movies, while I love horror, I can rarely ever find anything that honestly scares me. I tend to go more for Asian horror, South Korea being my particular favorite country for horror these days. Unique plots, amazing twists, storylines anywhere from jaw-dropping to heart-wrenching to pissing-your-pants-in-horror, great actors and direction--quite an amazing array of films. I will admit that every country has its duds; they just seem to have quite a few less than America these days. Blood and gore isn't scary, repetitive plots really aren't. It takes a lot to scare me, and it has to be good psychological fear. In my own horror writing, I don't feel the story is up to par unless it gives me nightmares. For a laugh, though, I admit I do love B-Horror. Adore it. Especially if it involves zombies. Bruce Campbell is very high on my list of favorite actors, so that should tell you a lot right there.
Music, I'm a classic girl. Living in the South has gotten me a little into country, but what can ya do? I also love blues. Pretty fond of punk rock as well--real punk rock, not pop punk--though perhaps not as much as I used to be. Classical guitar. Flamenco. I'm even quite fond of bluegrass, to be honest. And celtic music, both traditional celtic and celtic rock, as I embrace my Irish heritage to the fullest extent. To name a few random artists... Led Zeppelin, Thin Lizzy, Journey, Aerosmith, The Beatles, Tom Petty, Creedence Clearwater Revival, ZZ Top, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Zac Brown Band, Blake Shelton, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Leadbelly, Bessie Smith, Robert Johnson, Sex Pistols, Ramones, Charlie Daniels, Flogging Molly... yeah. That's a very small portion of my list. You'd just be better off asking if I'm interested in a band/musician, if you're curious; if I listed them all here, then I'd be typing for years.
- Tyler Durden, "Fight Club" by Chuck Palahniuk
- Nelson Mandela
EVERYTHING. Thinking is one of the reasons I've had insomnia on and off for several years. I don't stop. I've been told I'm a philosophical thinker; personally, I just prefer not being empty-headed. If I'm quiet, it's probably because I'm thinking.
Music, writing, characters, politics, philosophy, theology, science, nature, photography, art, explosives, cooking, gardening...you name it, I've probably thought about it within the past twenty-four hours. There's rarely a moment when I'm not thinking too much about something. It's the biggest part of why I have insomnia; I can't shut off my mind, and it can be debilitating at times.
"I reject your reality and substitute my own!"
- Adam Savage
- Ford Prefect, "Life, The Universe, and Everything" by Douglas Adams
I'm mad. But that's not precisely private.
I don't exactly keep much secret. I mean, come on, I've already admitted that I've never even been in a relationship. What more do you want?
Really, I don't have much that I keep private; I'm not quiet because I'm secretive, I'm just quiet because I'm shy.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes of the cape. You're-----
...still reading this? Well, then. This is awkward. Ahem.
You should message me if you feel like messaging me. Why else would you message me?
Well, if you too are a writer of fictional prose or a player of musical instruments; if you enjoy friendly debate or intelligent conversation; if you too enjoy cacti, liopleurodon, koalas, llamas, pirates, or learning new languages/alphabets...well, if we share any common interests at all, send one my way.
And on a side note, I'd really prefer that you only message me if you have something to say besides "hay wats up". You can send such messages. I won't get mad or anything. But I probably won't bother replying very quickly, either.
Or if you have a stockpile of interesting quotes. I'm addicted to interesting quotes.
"Hatred is never appeased by hatred in this world. By non-hatred alone is hatred appeased. This is a law eternal."
- The Buddha