a_neat_aesthete
28Manhattan, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
a_neat_aesthete
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Hi there!

I'm an adult human who tries to live life with as much honesty and vulnerability as this grinding machine of a world will allow. I love people, and try to meet everyone on the same plane. Not much for formality or hierarchy, but I can play those game in my more tertiary relationships (if need be).

Currently a little banged up in the heart area, not really looking to rush into anything too serious. Definitely hoping to start with friendship.

I'm polyamorous (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory), but not very promiscuous. I find familiarity really sexy. More commited to finding a partner(s) who wants to build something that works well for both of us than I am to any particular structure. It takes a lot of neglect to stoke a jealous ember in me.

I value honesty, consent, and reciprocity in my relationships. After some time spent licking my wounds, I think I am finally ready to begin seeking those things out again. I'm happiest in long-term committed relationships with people who don't need exclusivity to validate the strength or value of a bond. I'm under no illusions about the finite nature of time, energy, and attention; but I believe that love is infinite, seeking partners who feel similarly.

I love to play. I revel in affection and love to give it to people who feel the same way. I could live most of my life either alone, or in some sort of cuddle puddle (anything in the middle makes me a little antsy to be honest).

Extremely close with my roommate/best friend pennpaul who's been an incredibly consistent and loving influence in my life for a very long time. We used to be romantic, but have been more platonic for the last couple years. I sometimes call him my live-in puppy; a relationship with me will surely include some interaction with him.

Communication is extremely important to me. I play very well with rules and boundaries, but I am not a mind reader and want to be with people who support me in meeting their needs. I think I'm pretty good at accepting people's truths graciously, but I'm terrible at accepting withdrawal and stonewalling (because really, who likes that?). I'd honestly much prefer a drop down drag out fight to some passive aggressive battle of wills. If you might consider describing yourself as cold, please do us both a favor and look elsewhere (I'll try to make that my only ultimatum).

People ask about my preferred gender pronouns: I don't really have any. I identify as male bodied, and with a lot of characteristics culturally assigned to femininity as well as masculinity, so the androgyne label seems to fit. But I'm pretty fluid, and not very touchy about gender. I'm generally pretty comfortable in my body and expression (though I have come up against some aggression lately that's made me maybe a bit more skiddish than I would like. I'm working on it). I think if there were gender neutral pronouns that felt natural to me within the language I would use them, but I have yet to find them. I basically think of gender roleplay as kink, so don't be afraid to express preferences with me.

I can be somewhat shy and aloof, but then at other times I'm feisty and puckish. If you treat me with warmth and respect, you're just about sure to get that back in spades.

So go on, say hello...
What I’m doing with my life
I'm an artist. I work in music and narrative. Here's one of the projects I'm working on: https://soundcloud.com/the-nice-bryce/sets/the-love-suites-hope

Working odd jobs.

Exercising patience.
I’m really good at
I'm a good actor and singer. I think I'm a pretty good writer. I work well with shapes and colors. And processes, I'm really good at picking up new crafting skills and doing them like I'm a pro (I pwn expertvillage)... though I'm not very fast, at anything... well, except running.

I think I make a pretty good cocktail. Working on building my range and style...

Ya... oh, I'm a good dancer! I love to dance. Do you? Super interested in dance and acro yoga partners.
The first things people usually notice about me
uh...

My face?

That, or my clothes (or like, my height... Oh wait, it's the heels).

Maybe my hair: It's curly, which is I guess surprising to some people? I don't really know.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Reads:
An Actor Prepares-Stanislavsky (so much more than acting instruction), Giovanni's Room-Baldwin, Anything by-Wilde or Albee (The Goat is AWESOME), Harry Potter is my childhood, Ragtime-Doctorow, Oh, The Places You'll Go!-Seuss and The Little Prince-Antoine de Saint-Exupéry pretty much shaped the base of my personality, Tennessee Williams' later absurdist plays, The Art of Happiness-His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Cutler. Really enjoyed Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari

Listens to:
Sam Cooke, Hot Chip!!!! (I reeeeaaally like Hot Chip), Yosi Horikawa, The Books, Iron and Wine, The Dirty Projectors, Regina Spektor, Feist, TV on the Radio, Ken Ishi, Rihanna (has brainwashed me), Unknown Mortal Orchestra, Little Dragon, Janelle Monae, Aphex Twin, The Police, The Beach Boys, Otis Redding, Queens of the Stone Age, Bob Dylan, Al Green, fucking Queen, Animal Collective of course, Beats Antique, Rage Against the Machine, Death Cab and The Postal Service (ya, I said it), Lauryn Hill, listening to a lot of early blues, work songs, and spirituals recently. Whenever I'm trying to understand a genre I go back to the beginning... hopefully this list never ends...
and the musical list:
Hello Again-Michael John LaChuisa (I groan in admiration), The Last Five Years-JRB, Caroline, Or Change-Kushner and Tesori, ,Parade-JRB, Adding Machine!!!!!, On the Town-Bernstein and Comden & Green or anything Bernstein has anything to do with. I'm also starting to like Weill quite a bit, I like Street Scene. Spring Awakening-Sheik, Ragtime-Flaherty and Ahrens, A Very Merry Unauthorized Children's Scientology Pageant-Jarrow...
I think you get the point.

Eats:
I'm generally eating mostly for nutrients or mostly for comfort. So like, sauteed kale, and then Ben and Jerry's Core flavor ice cream.
I love French pastries; CROISSANTS!
salmon, duck, dried fruit, wine, and Belgian beer
Tennessee Sour Mash

I'm really on the front end of my movie exploration, but I love Me and You and Everyone We Know and I really love Chaplin. Anything by Chaplin. OMG The Circus. Kinda digging Keaton too. I thought College was hilarious. Life of Pi is a favorite, John Cameron Mitchel (though what I really love him for is the cast recording of Hello Again. Brilliant!) , Lars and the Real Girl (I miss Gosling so much), Also:
Punch Drunk Love, East of Eden, My Beautiful Laundrette, Her is just like, the prettiest, or no, maybe The Danish Girl is prettier, Moonlight is a new favorite, Trainspotting, Giant, The Conformist, Blancanieves, and Who Are You Polly Magoo? has been invading my dreams so I guess it must have made an impact. I think Bridesmaids is my favorite comedic talkie.
Six things I could never do without
I wouldn't wanna do without:

A piano
A pen.
Time (quite a bit of it, I can be a bit of a tortoise).
Some sort of notation system (seriously, I have no short term memory).
Semicolons.
Tea.
Wiki!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Psychology.
Dance.
Music.
Art.
Survival.
The anxiety of identifying with oppressed groups, and the stigma that goes with any expression of knowledge of being oppressed. And like, how to balance my political ideas with my humanist values/avoid the sort of tribal thinking that seems to be the root cause of so many of our species problems.
Power (power struggles make me uncomfortable, power play makes me horny, surprisingly fine line sometimes)
Theater.
Clothes. Fashion.
Gender.
Kink.
What the people walking by are thinking about or where they're coming from/going to, who they're coming from/going to. What those people are wearing and why that might be.
How to be happy.
Why I can't get myself to talk to that interesting looking person over there.
How to get that person to come talk to me.
Settings.
Seduction.
How to prioritize.
Ethics. Relationships.
The human soul, its possible existence, whether or not it's possible to prove scientifically...

and sex.
On a typical Friday night I am
Gosh, there's nothing typical about a Friday night...

I dunno. Depends.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've been really into lace lately...

I don't hide much. If you want to know something, ask me.
You should message me if
If you feel like it, I'm super harmless, really.

If you're the techno-glam-soul producer collaborator of my dreams...

You want to take photos of me.

You want to go dancing!

If you find my self summary more charming and quirky than awkward and obtuse.

If you consider yourself to be a pragmatist.

I'm definitely welcoming new friends, so please don't be afraid to say hello if you think we'd get along well. Open to all bodies and orientations as long as you are respectful and kind (yes, I'm looking at you "straight" man).
More
The two of us
--
Lifestyle
--
Dating
--
Other
--
Sex
--
Ethics
--
Religion