31Milwaukee, United States
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My self-summary
well i move to california alot to skip the cold winters here, lived out there during 07 to 08 and again in 2011 to 2012, but i always seem to move back here and i have no real plans to move out there all over again,
What I’m doing with my life
well last fall i won a stand up comedy contest while i was living in california, just ask me if you'd like to view a 5 minute video of my stand up act,
I’m really good at
well i know alot about history, you can ask me about anytime period or place in history if you want to, from the beginning with the supposed "big bang theory" or even the "God did it belief" all the way up to today and 90% chance i'll know something about it, because whenever i stay up late at night and nothings funny on tv i'll watch alot of interesting shows on the history, discovery, and natgeo channels,... i also know alot about what's healthy and what's not healthy
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
books - some

movies - sure

music - whatever

food - depends
Six things I could never do without
My car: i'd die or starve to death with out it.
My phone: Oh crap, i've become one of those people now.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
how boring this site is, how no one on it wants to date, or even read my profile, like how i can also say i like Cage fighting bears, making my AWSOME bathtub potato gin moonshine, teaching parrots at pet stores swear words, Robbing ice cream from ice cream trucks, stealing honey from bees, snatching penguins from zoos and keeping them as pets, hunting leprechauns at the end of rainbows and stealing their pot of gold
On a typical Friday night I am
watching real time with bill maher, unless i have somwhere fun to be
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
here are some not really that private stupid old joke answers: --- Watch me in my upcoming cameo in CBS's C.S.I's Las Vegas playing "Weepy Gambler in sweatpants"... I will be staring in a remake of "The good, the bad, and the ugly" where I'll play all three roles. Emphasis on "The Bad"... A lack of clean laundry is only one of the reasons CBS and MTV keep turning down my Big Brother and Real World applications... If you're still wondering who shot the sheriff I did! but I did not shoot the deputy... I have a problem with kleptomania, but i'm taking somthing for it... I was accused of a prank involving Ex-lax---The authorities are still investigating me... I was almost killed when I antagonized this drunk midget with a shiv who was a lot tougher then he looked... My anti-drug is pointless vandalism... I did not cry every time I watched the movie "Dumbo" and anybody that says I did is a Damn Dirty Liar!... One day I nearly died when I was alomst chased off a cliff by Muppets... I have reached a uneasy truce with most N'Sync members, but I'd still kill J.C Chasez as soon as look at him... One of the things I was in incarcerated for was taping a baseball game with out the expressed written consent of Mayjor League Baseball... In some alternate reality there's a evil (and not very funny) version of me who lays waste to his home world by a means of a secret empire. Fortunately you got the good me. (Or did you.)... I know that lawnmower blades and feet DO mix. But only Scott Walkers feet...
You should message me if
you're a REAL girl and you want to get together and go out and do somthing fun, and if you're a girl who chats with me on here for a few minutes and then asks me to join you at your naughty model web-cam or some kinky dating site kill yourself,
The two of us