30Hudson, United States
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My self-summary
Hello! Thank you for accidentally clicking on my profile :)

Look over to the right with my description >
Yeah, right there where it says I'm five foot ten inches. Why the fuck is that "1" so small and the "0" is overpowering it? I don't like that.... please read on. Sorry for the interruption.

Been single for over six years now. Kind of don't want to tarnish this streak.

Hi I'm Jeff,
Before you read any further; here is some information that might help you understand what kind of person I really am. There are a few different types of guys when it comes to bathroom etiquette. I'm talking about public restrooms specifically. Ones who don't wash their hands after going to the restroom, some that don't wash their hands long or nearly enough, then guys who wash their hands properly. Then there are guys that will piss in a public toilet without putting the seat up, so that their piss gets all over the seat. The latter ( the last previously described act ) is truly disgusting and I've seen it so many times. In a handicap stall too before which is extremely disrespectful and uncaring. I yelled at an ignoramus in a bathroom once before for doing this. I only wish I would had gotten more confrontational when this happened. Next time it will be different. There is a reason I wrote this. The shitty bathroom etiquette aforementioned describes a large percentage of guys ( people ) out there today. Interpret this observational information as you would like.
What I’m doing with my life
Working; speaking of which you should start working on a message to send to me ;)
I’m really good at
Fishing, badminton, Adventures, being logical, telling bad jokes, dark humor, analyzing things, getting completely nude, roasting marshmallows, and petting dogs.
The first things people usually notice about me
My face. Not to sound like a narcissist......
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like any books on herpetology, or field guides, dictionary, books on stock trading.

Stepbrothers, Red dragon, Catch me if you can, Robo cop 2, Muppets Christmas carol, The big Lebowski, Dredd, Edward scissor hands, American Psycho, Elf, Django, and Ted.

Modern family, Dr. Who, adventure time.

Flounder, halibut, olive, sushi, sandwhich, potato chip, carrot, chicken, pretzel, BLT, deep dish pizza, greek pizza, pizza, lasagna, anything gourmet, Mexican, Chinese, anything good I like. I like to cook too FYI, go ahead and add that one to your notes.
Six things I could never do without
Sixlets... They are the best candy. Unfortunately they took up my six things :(.....
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The future, things I would like to do, stocks, places I would like to go, and my business.

Here is something I was just thinking about recently while out fishing: First let me start with what prompted the initial thought. While walking around the lake I cut through a part of the woods when I came across a hollow tree base that had a metal ammo tin inside. I got excited and opened it. All that was inside was some legos, a note pad in a sealed zip lock baggy, and some soggy Yugio cards.... I regrettably touched those soggy Yugio cards.... ewwww. Well I left it and walked away feeling disappointed.

I guess I was thinking when I picked up the ammo tin and could tell there was stuff inside that it was going to be something good like treasure. Then I thought what kind of asshole at 26 thinks he found treasure in the woods? I need to get over my dreams of treasure.

Since the above story I have found an additional geocache. Thanks to everyone on OKC that sent me a message telling me that gross ammo tin in the park was actually a "geocache" ( something people would actually want to find like in a scavenger hunt, and not something that should be thrown away in a trash can ).

If a man who has red hair and freckles drives a bread delivery truck, does that make him a "ginger bread man"?
On a typical Friday night I am
Looking in a mirror naked while telling myself I'm beautiful.

Probably going to go out next Friday though...
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Do you know how has the guarantee "meet someone in 6 months or get 6 months for free"? Well if this was I would be owed roughly around $10,000. I currently have a law suit against pending.


Here's some actual seriousness: I have ulcerative colitis. Since there is a genetic link to the NON contagious condition and a probability I could pass it onto my offspring ; in my opinion I am genetically inferior. I do not plan on ever reproducing and only interested in girls who don't want children too. Wouldn't want kids even if I didn't have colitis.
You should message me if
I'm sort of shy at first so you have to be okay with that. I'm also not the best at talking to girls since I don't do it all the time or often at all for that matter. So if you want a guy to charm you with words try someone who is really experienced with wooing women. Plus getting to know someone through text really doesn't have much depth or the same substance you would get from interacting with a person in real life. Funny thing is it seems like people who are tired of the bar scene and can't find anyone come here and people who have no luck here try the bar scene........

Here are some reasons you should message me below:

If you want to get together for one milk shake + 2 straws.

Or if you're looking for a long term serious relationship and think we could get gay with each other.

If you have something more to say than just "Hey" or "sweet ass" or "I want to watch you through your window while you sleep you little bitch". I mean come on seriously? >:-( Is that how you make a first impression?

Don't message me if you're just looking for sex. I'm not a piece of boy meat and don't appreciate some of the messages I've been getting.

I don't have tattoos..... so that means about 80% of girls right there won't like me hahaahahahaaha. That seems like a must for some reason : / If you absolutely need them I can draw on myself with a sharpie for the first few dates.
The two of us