What's the point in being grown-up if you can't be childish sometimes?
My Name is Daniel, but my friends call me Goose (Long story, nothing sexual. I promise) and/or Larios. I prefer the latter, but what're you gonna do? Nothing, that's what.
I'm a writer, one of about a million who have "talent" but not yet successful. I write poetry, short stories, and humorous essays. I don't really like to talk about myself much, but if I must, I must.
I like questioning things. I don't know why that is, I guess I never really thought about it. People tell me I'm funny and I don't know where they get that. I am told that I am intelligent. Yeah, I'm not that braggy in person. Its just you gotta brag a bit in these things to really stand out. That and throw out a random collection of words: BINGLE BONGLE DINGLE DANGLE LICKITY DOO LICKITY DA PING PONG LIPPY TUBBY TOO TA. I'm very good at listening because I like observing and knowing what goes on in other people's lives. I get that from my mom..... and my dad.... and my 5 sisters, not much from my 2 brothers. I'm very exploitable, thanks to 27 years of Catholic Guilt (thanks to a certain female parent that shall remain nameless) and my incessant need to impress/attract women.
My hobbies are writing dating profiles, reading pamphlets I find in Doctor's offices, collecting video games, and running from my problems. I play the cello, the recorder, a bit of the accordion, and a bit of piano. I always bring a banana to a party. You never know when you need one. Oh and I tend to write on walls instead of paper. You can lose a piece of paper, but you can never lose a wall.
With me, chivalry is not dead. I will open doors, pull out chairs, and stand when a lady is standing. I am nothing if not a gentleman. And don't let my pictures fool you. I am considered devilishly handsome in the Falkland Islands and parts of Guam..... but not the good parts. Now I'm just babbling incoherently. If you are still reading this thing, then may have already won my affection. Yup that's it. That's all it takes. I'm as disappointed as you are and I'm the one writing this thing. Do yourself a favor and RUN!!!!
Most of the time, I'm writing, mostly funny short stories, poems, and humorous essays.
I currently work as a freelance writer while looking for a more stable job.
Oh and I'm also one of five Library Commissioners for the City of Commerce. Impressed? Don't be.
I'm also great at drinking whiskey, driving stick shift, baking, and every variation thereof.
Krumping.... That's still a thing, right?
I'm also a pretty darn good unicyclist, well at least in theory. I've never actually tried it, but I bet I would be pretty fantastic at it.
Finally, I am great at being socially awkward. Its a curse I wish I didnt have, but so is the life of a nerd/geek/dork.
Fav. Movies: Any Kevin Smith movie, Godzilla movies, Star Wars (yes, even the prequels), The Big Lebowski, Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World, Iron Man 1 and 2, Trading Places, A Day Without A Mexican, and any comic book movie.
Fav. TV shows: Dr. Who, South Park, Simpsons, Family Guy, Futurama, Firefly, 30 Rock, Eureka, West Wing, Colbert Report and Daily Show, Psych, House, Burn Notice, and Castle.
I like to read, and my favorite authors are Neil Gaiman, David Sedaris, Rodolfo Acuna, Miguel Leon-Portilla and Martin Espada. Oh and I like comic books.
My Favorite word: FUCK. and Mahogany. try saying mahogany without smiling. I DARE YOU.
family and friends,
the English Language,
and Carbon. Can't do anything without Carbon.
I've always wanted to learn how to play the bagpipes. I guess I just want to annoy people in a musical level.
And finally, I am a triple threat. I am a Nerd, a Geek, AND a Dork. Yes, Yes, I amaze even myself.... Don't know why.
And Don't ask me for nude photos. I am sick and tired of ladies objectifying my body. I am not a piece of meat to be ogled at.