33Salt Lake City, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
I’m really good at
Naps. I nap hard. Memory foam mattress, You. Me. Tonight.

Making people laugh. Anything is game too.

Massages. I missed my calling.

My J. O. B. I like jabbing sharp objects into people's skin and then pushing liquid goodness into it to make them feel better.
The first things people usually notice about me
My dance moves and a smile that is up to no good.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Keep it brief. Ain't nobody got time fo dat!
Invisible Monsters by Chuck P. Lamb. The Shawshank Redemption. Chemistry teachers that make meth. Patriotism by Mishima. The genius of Dr. Sheldon Cooper. A sizzling bowl of be-Bim-bop from the Red Chili. Man on Fire. Satire. Food, tapas style. The man in black, Mr. Cash. The Duchess, Sterling Archer. Throw some hummus in there. Step-Brothers. Mother fucking e.e. cummings. Anything Tarantino, really. A blues electric guitar. Step-Brothers. Bacon and eggs special.
Six things I could never do without
The ability to wander. A good book. Sex.
Breakfast. I love breakfast. Adventure. People.

I could do without pants though.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If the younger version of myself would punch me in the face and if the old geezer I will become will be able to die at peace with the life he was given to live.
On a typical Friday night I am
Doing a 12 in the ED, hitting the bars, hanging with friends, running a cock fighting ring out of my basement (just kidding).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Got nothing. Not much is private. I said I didn't like pants.
You should message me if
If you, me, and a date sounds like a good way to spend your time.
The two of us