They took me out of curiosity. I was hauled to their cities in chains as a new found wonder. One night I bit out my jailer’s throat and ran free under the moon. By then I knew speech. I made my way to the New World on a steamship.
Since then, I’ve tamed lands, beasts, and women. Dark eyed servant girls laughed and filled my cup with wine; my cellars were stacked high with gold. Still. I was troubled by dreams. Talons of snow in the dark. The shrieking wind.
Seriously: I'm in an relationship with an amazing girl and we're looking for a cool girl to meet and if the chemistry's there, play around.
Hang gliding. Paragliding. Flying private planes drunk like JFK junior. Chess. Jaguar wrangling. The finest Colombian cocaine. I once tamed a lion simply by looking at it. I also teach adult literacy at my local library.
The Qu’ran spelled with a Q and prominently displayed so you know how multicultural I am,
The Big Bang Theory if every episode were just 22 minutes of the cast being slowly skinned alive,
ASOIAF which I don’t need to spell out for you cuz you’re a dork,
Claude “Ass Shredder” Debussy,
Johann Sebastian “Thunderscrote” Bach,
Spongebob if baked.
I also religiously watch the Human Centipede