37Milwaukee, United States
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My self-summary
I am a humanized version of a comic book character, or so I'm told. Short stature, mo-hawked, combat boot wearing, cooking for a living, cat-lady in training, crazy hair colored, tattooed, jeans wearing, beer drinking, karaoke singing beautiful disaster of a functioning adult. Life should be fun, so I avoid drama and bullshit. I have all the skills of a 1940's housewife and the sewing machine to match.
What I’m doing with my life
Spending time in professional kitchens slowly roasting my brain into a wonderful head cheese, thinking too much, occasionally playing cribbage, grabbing the occasional beer and singing my lungs out at karaoke (yeah, I'm THAT kind of a dork) once in awhile actually sleeping, trying to grow a beard (I've been attempting it for 2 decades but no dice). Hanging out with my roommate and the cats and refusing to believe I actually exist on more than a conceptual level
I’m really good at
Making fun of myself and laughing. Also I think I'm a decent cook, or at least I hope I am otherwise I should really find a new job . Stuffing things with other things and forcing people to put it in their mouths, making unusual desserts, making food that shouldn't be created on dares/random ingredients given to me by people, naming menu items after movies, albums, actors and authors (it took me three days to explain to everyone at work why I named a sandwich Bella Lugosi because they didn't get the joke and after a week I gave up trying to explain the Surfer Rosa).
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm seem taller than I am but I'm still really short
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books- Just about anything from King, Gaiman, Pratchett, Stephenson's cyber-punk bits and the Dune books
Movies- I love bad horror movies and dark comedies. Give me a bowl of popcorn and a late night Indiana Jones, Boondock Saints, Sam Rami or old Peter Jackson marathon and I'm happy, I can also quote Goonies and Ghostbusters extensively.
Shows- Gotham, Doctor Who, The Young Ones, Leverage, Warehouse 13, Criminal Minds, The Colbert Report, Animaniacs and other assorted randomness.
Music- give me classic rock, punk, ska, industrial, metal, 90's alternative, swing, soul, blues, anything with a good melody that I can sing along with or gets my feet tapping.
Food- I'll put anything in my mouth and probably try to get everyone around me to also
Six things I could never do without
Sharp and Pointy objects
A source of fire
Patching fabric
My immersion blender (it's kind of my favorite thing right now)
Something to read
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Food, books, movies, mayhem, food, why this world is going to hell, why we have to wear pants, why can't I grow a beard, how long it will take before my cat tries to eat me and what would happen in a Zombie Apocalypse (yes I have a plan)
On a typical Friday night I am
Calendar Friday or my Friday? and exactly what is typical?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
My favorite "chick flick" is Heathers.... I refuse to explain my logic for this to anyone
You should message me if
You made it through the amazingly large amount of word vomit without getting lost, you want to rub my skull when it's freshly shaven, you realize the whole beard thing is a horrible joke (or you know the secret to growing an incredibly long lush bushy one), you don't mind hanging out with someone who thinks about food ALL THE TIME or you need someone to be on your team for trivia. Because it's our time, our time down here!
Seriously, I'm as human as the next person once you look past my cybernetic body and see that even a brain in a jar can be sexy.
The two of us