51Brooklyn, United States
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My self-summary
Okay, it's now 2015. I've been in NYC four years. I'm not sure I can consider myself "new meat" anymore. I've made some great new friends, but have yet to meet anyone who actually fulfills OKC's match percentage. I'm not sure how they arrive at those figures either. I've heard it involves gnomes or elves or some type of creature that can easily fit through a cat flap if necessary, but I'm not sure I believe it. Still -- this is NYC -- so I suppose anything's possible.

I am British by birth. My parents dragged me to the US before I had the ability to verbalise an opinion, so I grew up in a small seaside town in southern California. My mother spent 30 years as a child psychologist, specializing in rehabilitating abused/displaced children. My father spent 30 years creating nuclear and biological weapons that could potentially eliminate all the people my mother helped.

I began my own less-than-illustrious career as a backup singer for Disney by day, and a go-go dancer by night. I imagined myself on stage crooning with Barry and Bette and Elton. Fame and fortune and glamour would find me and I'd live a life of sheer fabulousness. Kylie and I would be besties.

But instead, reality slapped me. Really, really hard. In the form of some intangible mess called "Reaganomics". So for the next 27 years I spent my life working in a rather odd assortment of jobs: a bartender at a seedy gay bar, a pawn shop manager, the CFO of the company that bought the pawn shop, a regional training director for a large now-defunct video rental chain, a warehouse manager for Trader Joes, and finally -- inventory allocations and quality control director with Amazon. Each job has brought a new set of challenges and has forced me to think in ways I'd never thought before. And ultimately, I think my life is richer for the experiences. Besides, I'm not sure I would've made the best diva...

Anyway, I left CA in September 2010 with many great memories, including a relationship which lasted 14 years, and moved myself to NY. It was literally a spur-of-the-moment, totally spontaneous decision. I needed to experience new things, including these so-called "seasons" that I'd always heard so much about.

I've now been in NY four years. I've experienced a tornado, five feet of snow (twice), sweltering heat and humidity, bitter cold, two hurricanes, and being chased by a flock of hungry pigeons. In all, I wouldn't trade it for anything. I love it here. Okay, maybe the pigeon assault can go...

My friends have described me as witty (really?), charming (he was bribed), caring (I help my friends move every other month), and I apparently give good psychoanalytical advice (thanks mom!). Oh, some random guy told me I was cute, too. It was recent. I swear.

I love music. Shows. Plays. Baseball. Billiards. Craft beer. Mojitos. Thai, TexMex and Italian. And I cannot resist a good burger or steak (though I do my best to limit them these days). I love shopping at Buffalo Exchange and Trader Joes. I adore Starbucks, but also the cool independent coffeehouses too. NYSC and Blink gyms. I'm always at home at the Met, the MOMA, BAM and the botanical gardens. Walks and picnics in Central Park. The high line. Chelsea pier. Stone street in FiDi.

Anyway, I think I'm a pretty well-rounded guy, whose diverse experiences over the past four decades have given him a unique, often humourous, perspective on life. Life is a journey -- a road. And while my road has often had unexpected twists and turns, it's ultimately taken me to some wonderful and enchanting destinations. And I'd love a new travelling companion...
What I’m doing with my life
I'm letting my life pass me by as I fill out all these essays and questionnaires.

No...seriously, I'm doing a lot. Really.

I wake up every morning and think of three things that make me happy. My mum taught me to do this when I was young. It was one of the best pieces of advice ever.

I work every day as the inventory allocations and quality control director for one of Amazon's largest contracted fulfillment centers. It's a big job. It's a dirty job. But someone's gotta do it. Apparently they think I can.

I go to the gym in an attempt to keep myself as physically appealing as possible. I recently joined Equinox and Blink so if anyone wants to be my "gym buddy", PLEASE get in touch with me. I could seriously use the motivation.

I take horrible self portraits. There are several perfect examples here.

I cook often (I try to put my culinary degree to some decent use), I clean regularly (my place is only dusty 3 days a week), I do laundry when necessary (none of my jeans can stand of their own volition -- yet).
I’m really good at
The only thing I'm really lousy at is telling others what I'm really good at. But, in the possibility that this stuff might land me a date, I'll try to list a few things. As humbly as possible, of course...

1. Cooking
2. Singing
3. Trivia night at Big Daddy's
4. Finding obscure music on the internet
5. Living life to the fullest
6. Finding the humour in virtually any situation
7. Explaining to people why Amazon can't take back used dildos.
8. Using proper grammar and being generally eloquent
9. Making people laugh
The first things people usually notice about me
Lots of people notice lots of different things about me. Old people are drawn to my kind and caring demeanor, and the fact that I still have fully-functioning organs. Women often notice my skin, which still looks fabulous for some odd reason, considering I really haven't done much to help it stay looking that way. Straight men often notice that, when they stand next to me, it makes them look gay too. Gay men have commented on my eyes, nose, ears, chest, biceps, thighs, calves and butt. I mean, they've said good things about all of them. They've also said that when they stand next to me, it makes them look straight.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: "Conversations With God" (Neale Donald Walsche). I re-read this book every year. It really helps me keep life in perspective.

Movies: Schindler's List, The Color Purple, Aliens, Silence Of The Lambs, The Ref, Enchanted, Ever After, Thoroughly Modern Millie

Shows: I Love Lucy, Golden Girls, Fawlty Towers, Are You Being Served?, Dead Like Me, Ghost Hunters, MASH, Simpsons, Family Guy and Modern Family.

Music: My musical taste is SO ridiculously diverse (I have almost 100,000 songs in my i-Tunes library), but these are a few highlights: Duran Duran, ABBA, Pet Shop Boys, Foster The People, Florence And The Machine, Tori Amos, Kylie, Madonna, The Alan Parsons Project, Pink Floyd, Tchaikovsky, Ultravox, Robbie Williams, Take That, Dead Can Dance, Simple Minds, Erasure, Shiny Toy Guns, Gregorian, Enigma, Swing Out Sister, OMD, Prefab Sprout, Beethoven, Vivaldi, Haydn, Sarah Vaughn, Etta James, Glenn Miller, Sarah Brightman, Buddha Bar, Cafe Del Mar, Hotel Costes and Saint Etienne.
Six things I could never do without
1. Coffee (usually Starbucks)
2. Family and friends
3. Water
4. Music
5. Trader Joes
6. My sense of humour
I spend a lot of time thinking about
World peace (or is it whirled peas?).

I spend a lot of time wondering why there is so much unjustified hatred in the world. Mankind is becoming so barbaric (again), and for what purpose?

I spend time trying to figure out ways to get vendors to take back used stripper poles. Some days I think it would be easier to return a used stripper.

I spend time wondering why pig thefts in NYC were up 400% last year. I also spend time wondering why I was never informed that pig thefts were even an issue in the first place...I wonder if I should lock up my bacon?

I spend time wondering why I can never find two matching socks. And increasingly, two matching shoes...

I spend quite a lot of time these days wondering why OKC consistently matches me at 90+% with all these guys who aren't interested in anyone over 35.

But I spend most of my time thinking of ways to bring some fun and humour and laughter into the lives of those around me.
On a typical Friday night I am
1. Using my paycheck to help stimulate the NYC economy.
2. Watching "Are You Being Served?" reruns.
3. At work.
4. In bed.
5. At home on the computer designing rollercoasters.
6. At the gym.
7. Stuck on the L train in between 6th and 8th avenues.
8. At some fabulous eatery.
9. With friends having game night.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm not perfect.
You should message me if
Well, if you made it this far, you should message me regardless. You've already invested this much time -- what's a couple more minutes? Besides, if you don't, I will hack into your mother's and/or your boss' Amazon account and send them 100 packs of extra absorbency adult diapers with a note from you saying "I thought it might be time". :)
The two of us