I am not 100% sure where this ends, and that's okay with me. I have had all the checkboxes on the American dream checked off, and discovered that the promised Hollywood happy ending does not automatically ensue...so, I am looking for happiness that is not necessarily defined by societal convention.
As you will find out if you read further...I am not sure about long term relationships vs. short term relationships right now, and that's okay, too. Just because I am not ready for something the Universe throws my way does not mean it won't be good for me.
Some people have asked me, given this outlook, why I have a profile here, and wouldn't it be easier if I got my house in order first and decided what I need? The answer is that reading profiles here and occasionally sharing and interacting with women here gives me hope for myself and humanity at large for the future... ;)
Sometimes it's just a drive-by moment of shared understanding, or a compliment for someone who is also putting themselves out there. Sometimes it's a philosophical discussion. Sometimes, it's a friendship that wasn't there before. Sometimes, it's a spark...sometimes requited, sometimes not.
It's all good, from my perspective.
People analysis (less so on the design front)
I like works involving philosophy, human nature, science fiction and fantasy, romantic relationships...
3. Innocence/Sense of Wonder
For example, in the "I'm Looking For" section you have to check "long term dating" or "short term dating". Who the heck knows if their dating is going to end up being short term or long term (other than those looking for casual sex, which is covered in another checkbox)? ;)
Don't most people hope for a long term connection and reluctantly settle for short term explorations? Maybe 25 years is too long to be out of dating...
I also want to use this section to address a couple of things I have been asked about my profile:
- I listed 20-60 as the age range I am interested in. Age is just a number; personal growth and maturity are attractive to me. Some people manage this in their 20s and others never reach it at all. That being said, I tend to stay close to my own age range...but I also don't want OKcupid arbitrarily excluding me from seeing someone that is wonderful simply because their birthday fell somewhere far from mine in either direction. I want to be open to meeting anyone that I resonate with.
- I am okay with posting a photo of me that also shows my niece when she was a baby...nobody can possibly recognize her. If she were older in the photo, I wouldn't. I did not post that photo to exploit her, it really happens to be one of the only photos I have of myself recent enough to show. Maybe it's because I believe that cameras steal your soul and I duck out of every photo I see coming? ;)