36Seattle, United States
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My self-summary
Creative energy inspires me. I try to surround myself with people who get it under their finger nails.
I'm not really interested in relationships that never skim below the surface. We're both worth more than that.
I'm pretty comfortable in my life and in my heart and in my skin. I don't mind holding onto my past. What was true is true.
Music helps me explore who I am.
I can be quite a smart-ass and will most definitely value that in you as well.
What I’m doing with my life
I have my own psychotherapy practice. I love what I do. Otherwise I spend a lot of time building or planting or writing or creating. Or walking the flea markets. I'm about half way through ten books. Good god do I need some fiction in life though.
I’m really good at
- food (many years in the industry)
- drink (see above)
- smart ass. Seriously I can be super snarky. I get a real delight out of being mischievous.
- I go to a church where the people give the sermon messages. I do this on occasion and get a lot out of it. I'm usually cursing God or patriarchy or Trump in my sermons, or suggesting how Christians throughout time have had a wide perspective of what it means to be orthodox, political, scientific, erotic, creative, philosophical, atheistic, and religious which, for me, are all pretty interesting exercises of faith.
The first things people usually notice about me
I have prescription circular hook arm glasses and everyone likes to point out how much they look like Harry Potter glasses. I get it. They look like Harry Potter glasses.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
- GK Chesterton, Mirslov Volf, Henri Nouwen, Tolstoy, Thomas Keating, Thomas Merton, Meister Eckhart, Kahlil Gibran, Irwin Yalom, Gabor Mate, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, stuff published by McSweeney's...

- American Pop, Kieslowski's three color trilogy Blue, Red, White, Royal Tenenbaums, Fog of War, Say Anything, Punch Drunk Love, Lost in Translation, Tree of Life, Blues Brothers, In the Mood for Love, Exit Through the Gift Shop, Constant Gardner, Dead Man, Down By Law, Raising Arizona, The Brothers Quay, Amalie, A Very Long Engagement, Baraka, Last of the Mohicans, Triplettes of Bellville, True Romance, Heathers, Deer Hunter...

- Leonard Cohen, Tom Waits, Emmy Lou Harris, Townes Van Zandt, pre1980s Roberta Fleck, Psychadelic Furs, Dianna Ross and the Supremes, David Bowie, Aretha Franklin, Van Morrison, John Denver, Fleetwood Mac, Peter Gabriel, Bonnie Prince Billy, Velvet Underground, Scott Walker, Lee Hazelwood, Panda Bear, Nick Cave, Nick Drake, The National, Julie Byrne, Steve Gunn, Vetiver, Julie Cruise, Cat Power, Bon Iver, Portishead, The Weeknd, Russian Circles, Sixteen Horsepower, Washed Out, the Four Tops, Sam and Dave...

- and all food. all of it. Nothing better than a slow cooked meal, bite for bite, with a good drink and a good conversation.
Six things I could never do without
I'd rather learn to do without. I find I'm far more comfortable when I'm less reliant on having stuff and more comfortable giving stuff up.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to be more assertive when it's called for and less defensive when that's what's called for.
On a typical Friday night I am
Now that I don't bartender anymore Fridays actually mean something! I love seeing film or music, making a nice dinner and breathing easy at the end of my busy week. See art, find a soul night - whatever man, we'll make it happen!
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
This online shit is rather soul sucking. I'd much rather meet in person but for the time being I run therapy groups in the evening and don't get out much 😬
You should message me if
Just do. Really. I'm fine and I bet you'd be fine if nothing came of this but an enjoyable drink in the evening or an afternoon coffee.
The two of us