chancethepants
41 Seattle, United States
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chancethepants
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My self-summary
So . . . my name is Chance.

I feel like I hit the jackpot with my name. Naturally, there's a story behind it, but it's probably not what you think. My middle name is unusual too; it's an animal known for its sense of family and survival. Even my last name has some good stories behind it . . .

Like some people, I grew up as the "weird kid." And that is not to say I was creepy, rather it means I grew up as an oddball. This nonconformist tendency took many shapes over the years, with peaks and valleys, and it still does I suppose. But these days, I employ such inclinations with a bit more grace and tact - and a lot less piss and vinegar.

Making friends who are solid and who host a myriad of awe-inspiring talents is extremely important to me. I'm excited to meet even more people who hold onto these attributes for dear life. I surround myself with folks who push me to higher ground and I will accept nothing less from someone I date. I love being exposed to new art, new conversations, new music, new science, new thinking and new bikes (drool)!

I'm kind of an alien, but not so foreign I alienate people. In fact, I'm quite the opposite in that I'm outgoing, open, and present. I often push these elements to new levels through authenticity. This can manifest itself through the simple interaction of saying hello to a stranger in the grocery store or it can be as complex as falling in love. Either way, I consistently break facades into pieces, my own and others'.

Generally, I'm attracted to bi or bi-curious or queer-identified women, but I love straight women too - especially those who don't rely heavily on traditional gender roles. This doesn't mean I won't hold the door open for you. In fact, I will, but it does mean I want to be with a woman who will hold the door open for me too. Chivalry is not dead; it's just been re-invented, and it isn't something just men are supposed to do. In short, I prefer to date forward-thinking women.

These days, my dating palette has quite a few colors on it. I'm definitely interested in making new friends. If you simply want to pal around with a new person, but without the pressure of calling it a date, I can do that easily over supper or a couple beers or while making art or whatever. I have an uncanny ability to stick to clear boundaries. I can also date short-term, which can include a lover component or not; do not let that be confused with casual sex. I'm not into that. Being a respectful lover is way different than casual sex. I also want to find a life partner and have kids eventually. If you want to date me long term, then you have to want that too.

If I ever "settle down," it won't look at all like the white-picket fence story that many folks seem to want. I prefer some kind of "alterna-ship," a partnership that stands, with great bravery, outside this white-picket box.

10 Random Chance Facts:

1.) I have a degree in cognitive psychology.
2.) Köln, Germany was a place I called home once.
3.) The number of times I've been hit by cars while riding my bike is astounding. I've been hit 5 times and doored once. All the accidents were caused by drivers not signaling.
4.) Oddly, I've fallen madly in love a staggering 5 times. I'm hoping this number doesn't correlate with getting hit by cars.
5.) I have a strange affinity for visiting cathedrals, but I'm not at all conventionally religious.
6.) My cat, Eva, is named after a woman I met on a train in Germany. The gal kindly gave me a ride home from a train station and I never saw her again.
7.) For my 21st birthday I stayed up late to write a 2-hour lecture on the mind-body problem. I had to give the lecture the following day in my psychology class.
8.) My right thigh is covered by a tattoo of Hypatia of Alexandria. Don't know who she is? Look her up or ask me to tell a story about her; she is one of the first known feminists. Such a stand-up gal . . . too cool for her time.
9.) I have studied ballet for more than 2 years as an adult and I still go to class.
10.) I've ridden a bike from Seattle to Portland 4 times. One of those times I did it in a single day.

And finally, regardless of whether we are a match or not, I would like to offer my encouragement and wish you well on finding the person(s) you want. Cheers!
What I’m doing with my life
Currently, I've got a few irons in the fire. And, most of the time, I'm just trying to make time for the things that really matter, which are my friends, riding my bike, writing, and telling stories. I write short fiction and personal essays. Also, in recent months, I've become involved with The Moth, a storytelling podcast on NPR. While I'm not directly connected to the radio show (at least, not yet), I compete in Moth story slams locally and I even win once in while.

To pay the bills, I got a job five years ago that I'm still excited about! I'm a facilities lead and administrator at a private middle/high school. I'm responsible for campus maintenance, emergency preparedness, and safety. I'm the dude who pulls the alarm for fire drills! Plus, I often have the opportunity to mentor and teach young people. Consistently, I facilitate gardening projects with students and on occasion I substitute teach. I love my job, it's deeply rewarding, and I am proud of the place I work.
I’m really good at
I should like to say I'm talented at communicating. I have a tendency to pore over words, to get it right, to be tactful, to remain fair. Most of the time I think before I talk, which is a talent only at its best when I don't think too much!!! I push my language quite a bit; I will use fancy words and I often try to put them in a fancy order. On the other hand, I also enjoy talking like a trucker ... so it ain't all Shakespeare 'n' shit!

To compliment the talking, I'm also stellar at listening. I love to ask questions and I really enjoy people who tell stories, no matter how mundane or dynamic. You'll impress me if you ask questions of your own. If you don't, I will get bored; I prefer conversations that go two ways.

Plus, I love like a titan, which includes but is not limited to: having deep respect for stand-up women, treating the gals I date like queens, paying attention, exhibiting fierce loyalty, and kissing with grace, poise, and passion.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm comfortable, genuine, and patient. I have a knack for putting folks at ease.

I am constantly on or near my bicycle.

I have a long mohawk that doesn't look like a mohawk because I wear it down all the time.

My left forearm has three keys tattooed on it.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Hmm, I'd rather list my favorite authors with important books in parens:

José Saramago (Blindness, Death With Interruptions), Mark Z. Danielewski (House of Leaves), Donna Tartt (The Secret History), Guy de Maupassant (any and all short fiction by him!), Edgar Allan Poe, Gabriel Garcia Marquez (Love in a Time of Cholera), Satish Kumar (Buddha and the Terrorist), Alan Lightman (Einstein's Dreams), Ayn Rand (I like her writing, not her politics!), Harper Lee (To Kill a Mockingbird), Franz Kafka (The Metamorphosis), Sissela Bok (Lying), Anneli Rufus (Party of One), Chuck Palahniuk, Mary Shelley, George Eliot (Silas Marner), Howard Zinn (People's History of the United States), Paul Kivel (Uprooting Raciscm), Steven Pinker (The Language Instinct) . . . and so many more.

Movies:

Seven, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Dancer in the Dark, Run Lola Run, First Blood, The Shawshank Redemption, Billy Elliot, Conan the Barbarian (the original), Castaway, Finding Forrester, Scent of a Woman, Moulin Rouge.

Music:

Nomeansno, Tool, Melvins, Tom Waits, PJ Harvey, Joy Division, John Lee Hooker, Bjork, The Gits, ¡Tchkung!, Minor Threat, Neurosis, Peter Gabriel, Fugazi, Arvo Pärt, Beastie Boys, Massive Attack, Sonic Youth, Isis, The Jesus Lizard, Foo Fighters, Burial, Henry Rollins (Rollins Band), Jane's Addiction, Nine Inch Nails, Portishead, The Ramones, Chili Peppers, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Rosetta.

Food:

I will eat just about anything as long as it excludes eggplant. With that said, I'm a fan of Mexican food and Thai. My favorite dessert is Lemon Meringue pie (I can bake a mean pie!!!)
The six things I could never do without
1.) Loved ones
2.) My bike
3.) My bike bag with all my survival gear in it
4.) Gals
5.) A handkerchief in my back pocket
6.) Writing
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Much of my time I spend poring over words in my writing, creating stories, considering ways to redefine love, natural disasters, gender fluidity . . . but most of all I would say I think about morality a lot. I'm often asking myself, "What would I do in this situation or that? How would I approach this or that difficulty? What do I believe about this or that? Does that fit in what is right or does it fit in what is wrong?"
On a typical Friday night I am
Friday nights are varied I reckon. I might be writing a story or brushing my cat (she always gets dreadlocks) or sitting around a fire with a bunch of witches or watching a movie or hanging out with friends or writing a letter or sipping on a warm cognac or sweeping the kitchen floor in my underwear (shrugs shoulders). Like I said . . . varied.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
There are so many of them! Just ask and I'll tell you some dumb-ass thing I did once . . .

. . . but to whet your curiosity I'm willing to say I had brain surgery when I was 28. That's chock-full of stories!
You should message me if
. . . you want to spend time with a respectful, creative man.

. . . you want to know someone who has a backbone made of diamonds.

. . . you want to ride bikes, look at bikes, and/or froth at the mouth for bikes.

. . . you have a strong sense of yourself. This is very important. You must be self-aware and know what you want in a partner and in life. Also, you need to know your flaws, be willing to admit them, and work on them in earnest.

. . . you want to eat pie with me! I love pie.

. . . you think tattoos and piercings are sexy.

. . . you would enjoy a butoh performance or going to the ballet or going to metal shows.

. . . you love hearing and telling stories.
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