31Hayward, United States
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My self-summary
To sum me up in more than a few words: Pie eating contests.

I’m the kind of guy who always finds himself in awkward situations. Whether it be falling in front of tons of people or getting stuck in revolving doors. I’m the guy who gets hit on by lesbians and has to wonder whether I should have re-thought the haircut and vest?
What I’m doing with my life
I'm working on becoming a Pokémon master.
I’m really good at
Locking my keys in my car.
Laughing when people fall, including myself. Even when my intentions are not to.
Coming across as sarcastic when trying to comfort someone. Also not intentional.
Forgetting where I parked my car and thus, my keys.
The first things people usually notice about me
Probably my size, translucent skin, and my eyes. Basically the same things people notice about Gollum/Smeagol. Meaning, I'm translucent. Like a deep sea fish.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Happy Endings, Miranda, Arrested Development, Orange is the new Black, Summer Heights High, Downtown Abbey, Pride and Prejudice, Community, Parks and Recreation, Will and Grace, most things Pedro Almodóvar and Christopher Guest. A fan of anime and video games as well.

I'll pretty much eat anything that has been pickled.
Six things I could never do without
Witty conversations and my Mini Schnauzer... Witty conversations with my Mini Schnauzer...
I spend a lot of time thinking about
whether or not people can tell I'm eavesdropping in on their conversations or planning my funeral. Usually done simultaneously.
On a typical Friday night I am
Working, studying, netflixing, drinking with friends, catching up on shows, or reenacting scenes from Pride and Prejudice with my roommate. Usually the latter.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
that I absorbed my own twin in utero...
You should message me if
You find any of this entertaining
You find any of this irritating
Upon first seeing my photo you feel righteous indignation.

Let's talk about it.
The two of us