Update: No longer new here, but that line is staying because I do what I want.
Also, I have a beard now and I'm not getting rid of it. So, mom, if you're reading this for whatever reason, YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO MOM.
K, some fun facts about Danyanimal:
I'm an extremely vindictive driver. Don't fux wif me.
I am actively trying to get fatter (sorta) to be able to lift heavier stuff.
Apparently it took my friend 3 years to determine whether or not I'm joking.
Grammatical errors make me mad.
I guess there'll be more to come whenever I feel like it.
If you're having girl problems, I feel bad for you son. I've got 99 problems and they're all crippling loneliness.
In five years I'm going to open a rehab clinic catered to my former clientele called "Kick Rocks".
Update: Crack stock plummeted, all the kids are doing Adderall now. So I had to switch careers to maritime work.
Dancing like a girl. My hips don't lie.
All the generic movies that people like, I like.
I also have an inexplicable hatred for the movie "Groundhog Day". There's a reason for this, it's just not a good one.
Game of thrones, Scrubs, Boardwalk Empire, Breaking Bad, and other stuff like that.
Apparently my cats. Which is weird because they're total assholes.
How many pomeranian dogs I could fight off at once. I bet I could handle like, 25 of those fuckers at once.
But that's only sometimes. All other nights I cry myself to sleep.
Update - no longer live in an apartment. Now my roommates have to deal with my nudity.
DUBBLE UPDATE - Living at home for summer. My mom calls me fat.
I do this thing where I internally mock people's voices or the way in which they laugh. Only sometimes I accidentally forget to do it internally and then I get weird looks.
If you know the difference between "you're" and "your"; if not, your probably just not right for me.
Girls that like horses too much scare me.
You're okay with the fact that most of my pictures involve fish I've killed. If it's any consolation, I make killer sushi.
I swear to god if I see the word "sapiosexual" one more fucking time...