deconstructiv
37 Seattle, United States
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deconstructiv
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My self-summary
Been in Seattle for a couple years now, but always open to suggestions for getting out and exploring more. Would love to form a mutual admiration society with a gentleman companion.
What I’m doing with my life
Working as a faculty member and higher education administrator. Alternately thinking and not thinking about film and media, gender and sexuality studies, food and cooking, yoga, spirituality in many forms, my cat, how many emails I can possibly get in one day, where I can travel next, and what I can watch on tv tonight.

Current obsessions include House of Cards, Kimmy Schmidt, The Great British Bake Off, How to Get Away with Murder, online advice columns, my weekly meditation class, and how I can start working on my own collection of essays.
I’m really good at
diagramming sentences; playing name that tune; Trivial Pursuit; picking restaurants; getting addicted to bad reality television.
The first things people usually notice about me
my glasses; my laugh (apparently it's loud but I've only ever heard it from the inside); my personality, which was recently called (and I think this was a compliment) 'disarming'; my adept use of parentheses.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: The Brothers Karamazov; 100 Years of Solitude; In Search of Lost Time; the Alexandria Quartet; Absalom, Absalom; Song of Solomon; The Color Purple; The God of Small Things; Everything is Illuminated; Slouching Towards Bethlehem; Just Kids; Notes from No Man's Land.

Movies: This is a hard one. When I was a child, it was Adventures in Babysitting and Return to Oz. When I was a teenager, it was Monty Python and the Holy Grail and Clue. When I was in college it was Memento and Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Now it's probably a quirky documentary or indie film, unless we're talking straight up most important films ever, in which case I say, watch Rashomon, La Dolce Vita, and Citizen Kane and you would probably have all bases covered.

TV shows: I like good stuff-- Orphan Black, Doctor Who, House of Cards, Girls, Looking, Veep, Downton are all shows I follow-- as well as bad stuff-- most trashy reality tv. I will never not have cable. My favorite days are those when you inadvertently find a marathon of someone needing an intervention of some kind, or someone who's ill-advisedly decided to renovate a house with absolutely no expertise for doing so.

Music: I found myself recently buying music by Will Butler, Lord Huron, Waxahatchee, Joanna Newsome, and Ryan Adams for just a quick sample from my iTunes. I'm really quite into collecting records and I like older country, 70s soul and r&b, 60s girl groups, and lots of singer songwriters and folk.

Food: Food is important. I cook. I eat. I dine. I pretend to taste various flavors when I drink wine. I read food blogs and keep a list of restaurants in Seattle to visit. I plan trips to places to eat meals. I eat meat and I eat dessert and I feel badly about either of those things only very rarely.
The six things I could never do without
1. My glasses, again. I am blind.
2. Diet Coke. I am addicted.
3. The Internets. How else would I correspond with you?
4. A long bath after a long day.
5. A good book.
6. Cable. [see above.]
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If you bring forth what is within you, what is within you will sustain you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you." -- The Gospel of Thomas

"Exactitude is not truth." -- Matisse

"Doing nothing can be a way of knowing something. Doing something can be a way of knowing nothing." -- Cary Tennis

"Love what you love." -- Van Gogh

"To copy others is necessary but to copy oneself is pathetic." --Picasso

"The opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, and emptiness, and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns." -- Anne Lamott

"Art is a wicked thing. It is what we are." -- Georgia O'Keefe

"Love comes with a knife." -- Rumi

"The mind creates the abyss, and the heart crosses it." -- Sri Nisargardatta

"To love another is something like prayer and cannot be planned; you just fall into its arms because your belief undoes your disbelief." -- Anne Sexton

"To choose doubt as a philosophy of life is akin to choosing immobility as a means of transportation." -- Yann Martel

"Blasphemy is not apostasy." -- Donna Haraway
On a typical Friday night I am
Out for dinner and/or drinks. Catching a movie or play. Going to an art event. At home on the couch eating takeout. Probably not at a club. Probably asleep when your grandparents are.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Once I was sitting cross-legged on the floor in a hallway waiting for a class to get out. I was sitting very still for a pretty long time. When I go to stand up, I had not realized that both of my legs had completely fallen asleep. As I rose to stand, I realized too late that my legs had no feeling. Imagine, if you will, me standing, only to have both legs wobble uncontrollably, then collapse in a woozy spiral in front of friends, students, colleagues. People thought I had suffered some kind of fit or attack. I had to endure several minutes of conversation with people as I lay splayed out in the middle of the hallway on my back. As in all inspirational stories, I eventually got back up on my own two feet. I bring this up now to make a point: after experiencing that, I should think online dating would prove to be much less humiliating.
You should message me if
You would like a charming date, a traveling companion, a pen pal, a bff (but not a fwb)-- another human being in the grey city who's connected to you somehow.
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