Who am I? Just the most phenomenal human of the interwebs.
Like all of us.
But we all also know the witty self-advertisement doesn't go too far in the first place. They ask you to post a picture for a reason. Fair enough.
Fulfill these tasks:
This guy has a point:
Still.. please be the girl from page 2. So worth it.
And for later...
I am a German (no, not the uniform kind! .. but I accept jokes about it all the way) professional photographer. Yes, that means I don't just own an overly expensive camera/camera phone and take pictures of my feet in fancy vintage light, I actually went to school for it and am lucky enough to call it my profession. It allows me to see many strange and interesting places, spaces, countries and people.
Inside knowledge contains:
- how to rip off TukTuk-drivers in Southeast Asia that want to rip you off
- how to survive wading through the river of death in Iceland
- teach you how to drink. You know.. like.. water..out of a waterfall ..or apple juice.. out of.. an applefall. Or well beer. No fall there.
I dare you to eat something I have cooked. No wait, I actually like home cooking quite a bit. Oh and most importantly I hate drama so much I won't even watch 'Schindler's List'. Easy going, open and communicative is so much more intriguing. So please, try it.
Further, I love to experience new people and love to hear of
different countries and cultures, or just your best story so far... Something like how to eat animals I usually pet or vegetable if you are vegan, which is cool by me. Or forbidden religious rituals like dancing naked while swinging a goat over your head. Or maybe just your story about your passions and fears. That is enough of a challenge.
I have been on a European tour as a musician once, but those days are over, which means I won't throw any TVs out of any windows anymore. Those flatscreens nowadays are just floating down anyway. Where's the Rock 'n Roll in that. I might play you an indie serenade though... if you pay me. I accept smile currency.
"Communication is the highest form of intimacy!"
"And all the things that we can learn about ourselves in the
context of someone else"
"Just because I don't love you, doesn't make me an asshole."
"Talking about love is like dancing about architecture."
"I'll tell you in a different life, when we both are cats."
"Actions speak so much fucking louder than words."
"Expectation is the root of all heartache."
"The only way out of the labyrinth of suffering is to
"A witty quote proves nothing."
..and not answering "hi, how are you?"-messages. Come on. That is even a lame text. You could at least leave me in the impression that you got this far in this waaaaaay too long profile.
But I really feel incapable to write it all down.
However, I am still very picky and passionate about it.
Especially when it comes to music.
My taste in music? Very good.
Ask for the song of the day and be at your knees!
Further I am a filmjunkie and love to go seeing movies.
To say at least something, the last books I read and loved were The Zahir by Paulo Coelho, A Thousand Splendid Suns, The Time Traveller's Wife, Ensemble C'est Tout and I haven't read one bad book by Ernest Hemingway.
When it comes to movies: Amélie, Fight Club, Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, Drive, Garden State and Beginners will always make it in the top list.
I don't watch actual TV. But I can laugh about South Park and Family Guy, I LOVED The Daily Show with Jon Stewart for so many reasons,
I like Breaking Bad and House Of Cards when it comes to TV shows via Netflix and ice cream with a friend. Game of Thrones sweetened my last bus ride to Montreal and Boardwalk Empire is a good good night show.
I love food. I prefer to get organic groceries, home cooking and eating healthy/clean, BUT I would never turn down a slice of Pizza or Ben & Jerry's!
The universe. Yes, I mean the actual thing.
Where to go next.
When I will arrive.
Why so much is based on fear.
If you are here because you are either lonely or scared.
What relationships are and if we actually want one.
Why some people think guns are cool.
If you are one that listens or just waits until it is her turn to talk.
Why you are surprised, that I'm surprised when I see you in reality, when all you have on here are overexposed, filtered instagram pictures of yourself.
Why so many girls rather take care of a dog than of themselves. And I don't mean the hygiene part. I mean caring.
Why so many girls complain about guys' mirror pictures, while they are having pictures where their boobs are falling out.
Why so many girls trust their over thinking more than their words.
Why so many girls make themselves hopeless romantics, when they much rather be hopeful romantics.
What exactly it is girls want to prove to themselves, when they don't want to kiss/just enjoy just once for the moment, if everything just feels beautiful. Not that I am striving for that, nor that I don't respect that, but considering that according to the okc questions 80% of you on here want to live out a rape fantasy, it raises some questions.
Edit: Apparantly I am not the only one wondering http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=za7jQ1s1BV0
..and why so many girls on here have one last strange picture on their profile. Seriously, it doesn't say anything about your humorous qualities if you are posting a picture of yourself making out with a blow up dolphin while wearing cow costume.
Why so many girls are offended by this list, rather than laugh about it.
I accept insults, since they are all justified. It still kinda rocks so shut up. And yes, that means I'm ashamed of it and it in NO way represents my taste in music, which is apart from that better than yours. There.
I never took a cell phone picture of my food.
I really dislike traditional regulations of dating. That doesn't mean I am inpolite, but if you are worth it, I'd rather make you feel like a million bucks than spending them on a tiny meal with a French name that leaves you starving. Plus you don't have to pretend that you want to split it.
I think, out of many reasons, online dating is good for sex and bad for love. There, I said it. And although that is not the apocalypse, I sometimes wish I was wrong in some sense.
Thanks for getting this far. You are crazy. But I love you.