60Hewitt, United States
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My self-summary
"you need a telescope to really get the dope on the stars up in the sky"

we are supposed to judge a profile based on 10 sentences as if we are purchasing an espresso machines. FART! i suppose that makes me a curmudgeon but an enlightened curmudgeon (GET OFF MY LAWN!). heerz my industrial form of story telling in 100 sentences.

i notice dat okcupid iz "liking" gals for me. i suppose the ok bot iz keeping track of every one i "liked" and just beating me to it on similar gals. still, i noticed "liked backs" that i know i didnt like becuz too far away. i wish the ok bot wud stop matching me wiff guys from manhattan. last time i checked my angle of the dangle iz still positive...

what to do? keep slogging on. well, i want an activity partner, a friend, a helper and even a lover. nice cleavage is a plus. some one local fer shur. i dont have a passport or the means to leave the usa. i'm a day tripper. i work in a factory, been beat down too long by "the man".

HEY! i aint goan to spin no tales about how great i iz. doan expect me to come to yur emotional rescue. iffen dat counts me out, so be it. i'll carry yur baggage though.

but...i knowz howz to be kind and helpful and generous. itz just dat i hate when people return good with evil. after bean alive for so long i think people are confused. are we supposed to chose pardners based on examples from the movies or TV? i want that green lady from star trek, TOS, "whom gods destroy".

times is hard. every one is trying to get over or get even. it's difficult to trust. we are all victims of the modern age.

i would like to mention some of my positive characteristics but i cant think of any off hand. trust me, i am a character! OO-OO! wait! i am kind (kind of lazy), generous (generous with what ever aint mine) and helpful (always helping myself to what ever i can get). so...what about you? are you practically perfect in every way like mary poppins? i jest, i am great, funny, friendly, compassionate, understanding, have super powers, bordering on genius, right?
What I’m doing with my life
i wanna see what happens next on the monkey sphere. this is easy being an uhmerikan. i have a ring side seat for the freak show! expecting the unexpected, DUCK! i haz ben chillin lately. i notice wen ever i open me wallet deer iz 60 box in it. i ax me self. "wut iz i doing wiff 60 box?" i slap me hand against me hade. i aint got a GF! girl friends are an expensive investment. suppose i buy a popcorn popper. when it arrives i hope it works and i doan wanna get a box of rocks instead. same thing wiff dee bank, when i deposit money i wanna get it back wen i knead it. well, .5% interest iz about all won kan expect. it haznt gotten to negative interest yet! and , well wiff women, i expect some thing back for me efforts also. it seems to me dat women my age doan expect to perform sex. even mentioning it iz taboo. but...BUT... i should hang wiff dee guyz instead? i am pooty shore i kaint "do it" reflexively like an animal on dee 1st date. i haz to warm up to dee idea. but if i established a relationship wiff a gal i wud expect it to lead to something sexy and enjoyable...eventually...mebbe,,,sorta...
I’m really good at
fooling the gods. annoying TPTB. BAU. spilling soup on a stranger.
marring a strange tale in telling it. delivering a plain message bluntly. taking a good idea and running it into the ground. taking a bad idea and running it into the ground.
The first things people usually notice about me
bubbles coming out of my ears.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
book-the city and the stars. movies-wallace and grommet, curse of the were rabbit. music-the decemberists. food-free! i am steeped in jap anime. may i suggest, ramen fighter miki? how about chobits? xxxholic? the daughter of twenty faces? zetsuen no tempest? haz to be english subtitles and OST. i like videos but i hate going to the movies. i dont fit in the seats, legs too long.
Six things I could never do without
food (free), water, air, gravity, space, time.(SN@RX!) there is a 7th thing. i hate this thing. it is money. we all need money, the curse of capitalism. the root of all evil but just like potatoes a most necessary root! GREAT CLEAVAGE!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
some boffins say we are living in a computer simulation. elon musk ox thinks so. every time i log onto okcupid i know it's true.

i iz glad i doan haz to wear lipstick and shave me legs. ARGH! why do women dye their hair and men get hair transplants?


the ways with which okcupid messes with it's member's minds (never get down on anybody else’s hustle). consider, i have been noticing that there are an increase in male matches i'm getting. mebbe okcupid is subtly telling me to "switch gears on the angle of my dangle". i notice dat okcupid iz already "liking" gals for me. otherwise i "liked" so many gals i kaint remember dem all. sometimes i like to write in the manner of MARK TWAIN!

how many dates do we have to go on before you show me the panties you are wearing? do they have hearts on them? duckies? a cute tiny bow on the front?

how to avoid the swirling greed of the vulgar elite.
On a typical Friday night I am
regenerating in the central incubator. what about yourself?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
i have never seen a UFO. i have never seen BigFoot.
i have never seen a sea monster. i have, however, seen the northern lights. I tell terrible, horrible lies (dont we all? {yes, you do} [logic bomb]). i often hop around like a kangaroo (for insight jumps, less complicated than , say, quantum jumping). some times i pretend to be an an old goat, BA-AH-AH! point of fact, i pretend to be many different animals. of course my fav pretend is to be human. ooo-ooo, ah-ah, eee-eee!
You should message me if
message me? i thought it was massage me! SN@RX!
The two of us