When I eat apples, I eat the whole thing; core and all.
In June, I went back to America after 16 months of teaching English as a second language in good, ole' Korea. I was home for seven months and I was miserable. Now I'm back!!
I'm a scrawny white dude in Seoul, I think it's pretty obvious that I'm a teacher. I'm not looking to live the 9-5 lifestyle. I'd rather gargle the pulpy remnants of my own testicles, after castrating myself with a rusty butter knife and mashing up the bloody accumulation in food processor, than work in another office. The world is way too big and interesting to waste away in a cubicle in Troy, New York for the rest of my life.
Staying in one place for too long makes me feel uncomfortable. I get bored easily and suffer from "the grass is greener" syndrome.
This song describes my dating life exceptionally well: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWczDzmqVBI
And this song, too!
These days, not much. I spend a lot of time reading and being judgmental. Recently, I've been trying hard not to give a fuck while simultaneously attempting to improve my death metal growl.
When I'm not being a huge loser, I'm corrupting young minds in South Korea.
That I'm serious, even though I'm not.
Cult, Slasher, Horror, Dark Comedies. I love" bad" movies; anything with Ed Wood, fishing pole flying saucers and or Bella Lugosi is fine by me!
Cartoons, British comedies (Peep Show, The Inbetweeners, Spaced) and Asian game shows with absurd obstacle courses. If I could live in any alternate reality, it would absolutely be The Venture Bros. world.
Heavy Metal, Death Metal, Thrash Metal, Punk, Cow Punk, Horror Punk, New Wave, Synth Pop, Folk Rock, Classic Rock and Prog Rock.
Anything spicy. I'd try almost any culture's delicacy. To say I'm an adventurous eater is an understatement. I've eaten and thoroughly enjoyed dog soup and chicken anus. I'd also love to eat cat. Are there any good cat restaurants in Albany?
Something to laugh about
Where that stain came from.
What human flesh tastes like.
Why so many Koreans in Seoul can speak German.
Hopefully, staying out until sunrise, Saturday, and then recalling vague and fuzzy details, while in the fetal position, on the floor of my bathroom a few hours later.
You thinkyou understand Neutral Milk Hotel's album "In the Aeroplane Over the Sea".
You think we'll have a similar moment to that scene in Wayne's World when Wayne sees Cassandra for the first time. Schwing!