40 Dearborn, United States
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My self-summary
I am a ninja warrior. My recent activity involves fighting space samurai from the belt of orion.

Basically, if you take Jack Sparrow and Wolverine and smash them together you get me, but with more excitement and panache.
You googled panache didn't you?

I am not intimidated by your degree I have a P.H.D. and three masters degrees. I also own the University of Michigan. I own the entire thing. I use the money that comes in from that just for gas money.

Did you notice gas prices dropped back down? That happens when I refuel my cars, I have so many. You're welcome.

Regardless of the fact that I am so out of control that I drive like Vin Diesel in that movie, drink entire bars out of their stock, crash weddings, crash funerals, crash parties, and crash cars; I am a mild mannered guy that just likes to cuddle and I'm not afraid to show my sensitive side.

Ever see a meteor burn up in the atmosphere? That's space samurai crashing to the ground, space samurai that I destroyed saving you. So you should thank me profusely! My organization made up NASA to keep people occupied and blissfully ignorant of the dangers out there. Only you, dear thousands of internet readers, know my secret now.

I am amazing and awesome and you can join me for the ride. I am a humble guy who is modest and sincere. We'll travel though space and time, jet ski through the Galapagos islands, remove snakes from airplanes, and have all sorts of adventures!

Here's an example of an adventure I had:

One day while I was in my space Lamborghini patrolling the asteroid belt when I was ambushed by space samurai. They came from behind an asteroid in Chevy Novas that were mounted with laser cannons. The fired at me and scratched the paint on my fuchsia space lambo! Outraged I opened fire with my nuclear space cannon and fragged one of them right where he stood. The other one was more wiley, like a cat or a monkey. He piloted his Chevy Nova as well as any space samurai I had ever seen.

I hit the gas and went as fast as I could. He then ducked back into the asteroid belt. Going full speed, with asteroids whizzing past me faster than the speed of sound; I darted, weaved, twisted, and sashayed my vehicle through danger and closed in on him. Getting next to his vehicle, I got out of mine and leapt on to his Chevy Nova, plunging my ninja blade into the roof, using it as a crampon to dig in and hold on. I made my way to his window and smashed my way through it with a ninja punch, simultaneously grabbing him and pulling him out of the Chevy Nova.

I thought I had managed to kill him but he somehow used his samurai sword to grab on himself and pull himself up. Now we dueled on his Nova, sparks rang as our blades clashed. Sound thundered throughout the soundless cosmos. We fought and he was good. I thought I might have seen the end that day. Just as he had me reeling, I saw that the Chevy Nova was about to crash into an asteroid, his back was turned facing the hood of the car and he did not see what was to become his demise. Leaping from the Chevy Nova, I flailed desperately; latching onto my car, which was following us on auto pilot the whole time. He crashed into the asteroid creating a ball of fire blood and guts that sprayed in every direction into the cosmos.

Satisfied at a job well done I went back to Earth to collect my ninja money. This could be you! You could have all of this!

If you read all of this you are amazingly patient and I want to meet you just because of that. You must be an admirable person... 1000 words my ass. :(
What I’m doing with my life
I am a ninja warrior. I pay for everything in ninja dollars.

I like to fight from my custom Lamborghini. Maybe I can pick you up in a Lamborghini. What's your favorite color? Because I own a Lamborghini in every color!

I just bought a mansion and a guest house with my ninja money. I kept the guest house and tore down the mansion so I could build a parking garage for my Lamborghini and Ferrari cars.

Did I mention I have Ferarri cars too? I have Ferarri cars too.

I am going to ninja school, because you can never stop learning new ninja skills.
I’m really good at
Ninja kicks, Ninja magic, bad-ass moves, singing, and chess.
The first things people usually notice about me
My middle name is Danger and I have a chin weasel. You like the chin weasel.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like Choke, Fight Club, A Clockwork Orange, The Hobbit, The Stand, IT, The Running Man, Kingdom for Sale!, The Belgariad, Breaking Bad, True Blood, Game of Thrones, Dexter, Penn & Teller's Bullshit!, Star Trek, and so much more.
The six things I could never do without
Ninja Skills
My custom samurai slaying blades.
Ninja Denny's
I spend a lot of time thinking about
If you could actually summarize yourself, which is comprised of all of your life experiences into this little page, how trite would your existence be, and how much would you have had to experience before people go tldr?

If you did manage to do that, wouldn't that be long winded and arrogant then? Who cares?
On a typical Friday night I am
Flying through the cosmos in my space Lambo fighting off space samurai. Also I ride my Ninja bike, and sometimes jet ski through the Galapagos islands to hone my skills against the man eating sharks there.

I once put a bowling ball through a men's restroom wall. True story.

If I do not have to save he planet from angry space samurai I am driving my Lambo around like Vin Diesel. If people aren't careful they could die around me. I am natural selection in real time!

I like to drink, gamble, get into bar fights, trash hotel rooms, and play with my ninja blades. When I let loose there should be a minimum of $10,000 worth of damages and fines. Which is no problem for my salary I have enough ninja money to cover anything. I see myself as a responsible person that is level headed and down to earth.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I could say I am a guy doing what I can to survive in the grueling environment that is the Michigan economy and that sometimes I like to share company with people and participate in life's adventures together. I could say that I am flawed individual that uses his only strengths to make it out there. But, that's pretty damn boring isn't it?
You should message me if
You want go to the galapagos islands and drop deep into the shark infested waters with me. I hope you can swim fast! LOL!