28Brooklyn, United States
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My self-summary
Writer. Book reader. Dog owner. City girl. Lush. Really fucking smart.

Major fantasy is being a part of Warhol's Factory. Art, intellectuals, the Velvet Underground, and amphetamines? Yes, please.

Bossy in the kitchen, so be ready to sous chef. But I make some damn good fried chicken.

I love to save up and blow 300 dollars on a good meal with good booze and good company. Really anything that has to do with good food, good booze, and good company.

Love a man with a beard. Basically, I'm into bears, but I prefer them to be straight.

I'm not boring. Please don't be boring.
What I’m doing with my life
Writing. Creative non-fiction, personal essays, freelance stuff. Always hustling, but I get bored if I'm not.

Taking the dog on long walks. Reading good books (I write non-fiction, but I read mostly novels). Coveting nice clothes I can't afford; hoarding secondhand two-ply cashmere. I've been working intermittently on a hand-sewn quilt for about a year now. Also, cooking good things and freezing them in individual portions. Eating dollar oysters. Drinking wine and whiskey.
I’m really good at
Throwing up without anyone noticing.
The first things people usually notice about me
If they can see me? My smile. If they can't? My laugh.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Recently loved Annihilation, The Underground Railroad, and Motherless Brooklyn. This guy gave me The Tsar of Love and Techno. It was great, but things went sour between us halfway through and I haven't picked it up again. Perennial faves are Vonnegut, Capote, Salinger. I thought I'd hate Moby Dick, but it is a fucking masterpiece. I love books and hoard them.

I get the New Yorker. Talk of the Town is my favorite, but I also love reading 10,000 word articles on, like, elevators or some shit. I also subscribe to the Economist, because it's a great way to learn about what's happening in the world outside the US. I've actually been reading that more than anything else lately.

In contrast, love terrible reality TV. Will never get enough Real Housewives. Also: The Americans, Stranger Things, Orphan Black, Black Mirror, Intervention, UnReal.

Food: Artichokes. Gummies. A good roast chicken. Black licorice wheels. Soup. Oysters and champagne, always.


The three men I'd like to go back in time to sleep with:

William Shatner, 1969
Bob Dylan, 1970
Paul Newman, 1967

Oh, and Bowie, duh.
Six things I could never do without
Cashmere cardigans
Pocket notebook
Felt tip pen
Dresses with floral patterns
A good book

But the only thing I would rescue from a fire would be my dog. I can live without anything else.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Why do I never have any money?
On a typical Friday night I am
Generally drunk. Avoiding crowded places. At home with the dog. Sharing a bottle of wine (or three) with a friend. Occasionally, sitting in the nosebleeds and watching an opera. Maybe a baseball game? I'd like to go to more baseball games.

I'm a homebody. I mostly just like sitting at home with my dog, drinking Manhattans, and watching some documentary about cults or drag queens on Netflix.
You should message me if
You're smart and creative.

You want to have a few drinks and talk about silly things for a few hours.

You like doing nothing.

You're a man in his 30s with a beard. Or gray hair. I will be inexorably attracted to you.

You appreciate bitches with attitude.

Sorry, I'm a New York elitist who doesn't like to travel too far. Please live in Brooklyn or Manhattan. Also, I don't do camping. Or vegans.
The two of us