29Arlington, United States
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My self-summary
Arlington by way of Los Angeles and Florida. Really stoked to have finally lived in enough places to use "by way of."

Bobby Hill is my spirit animal and my life coach. As a result, I have the world's worst sense of humor.
What I’m doing with my life
Scrutinizing the punctuation and word choice of PhDs and internationally recognized scholars and feeling really good about it. I work for a nonprofit and, judging from my paychecks, they're not kidding. Rimshot. Laugh track. Etc.
I’m really good at
Conducting entire Facebook messenger conversations using only Pusheen, Yuttari Dragon, and the cute little mushroom guy. The mushroom guy is fantastic.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
My taste in music is genuinely terrible and I am 100% unapologetic. It's not a guilty pleasure if I feel no guilt whatsoever. Real big concertgoer guy (pit only).

Some of my favorite books are Catch-22 and The Great Gatsby. I promise I graduated 8th grade.
Six things I could never do without
1-6. Don Cheadle on a bed of rice.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
My next karaoke selection. It's a process.
On a typical Friday night I am
On a mission for bad bitches and trouble.

But not really.

The single best thing I've seen on this website was someone answering this question with "Cultivating a late-'90s WWF aesthetic" and there is absolutely no way I can top that so why even bother trying, honestly. Punting this section.
You should message me if
You have a cute dog I can pet.

I'm serious. Let's talk about your dog.

I don't respond to "Hey." Or "Hey there." Let's have a conversation. Preferably about your dog.

Also, it's not really mentioned anywhere on this profile (with the exception of the Bobby Hill name check earlier), but I am actually a pretty big nerd. So it would be cool if you're at least okay with that.
The two of us