39Baltimore, United States
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My self-summary
the cadillac of nerds and your next theyfriend. the best of my kind.

two truths & a lie: i don't have a college degree; i've never been to Canada; i own the Dungeon Master's Guide of Geoffrey Chaucer.

small and round with strong outer defenses, a firm and upright but flexible spine, and a soft, cuddly underbelly; (un)selfconsciously fat, cute, sweaty, and/or food-stained; (agender) nb trans as fuck; soft butch as fuck; (solo) poly as fuck. cinnamon rolls > gender roles; sincerity > sarcasm; tabletop games > head games; spx/ape > marvel/dc; 13th Age > D&D/Pathfinder. obviously i'm really more of an indoor kid. i nerd out over nerdy things & there should be things you nerd out over, too.

dsa > dnc. my liberation is tied up in yours.

i'm a little unsure what i have to offer straight people, but i remain open to possibilities. hope springs eternal.

Eliza Skinner: "dating over 30 is like trying to lure a feral cat out from under a car, while you yourself are a feral cat under a car."

I can, in fact, see likes.

my instagram, linked below, is likely to just be my handsome and brave cat son for the next however long. sorry not sorry.

keywords: nerdy; queer; soft butch/hard femme; enby/non-binary/agender; solo poly;
What I’m doing with my life
going to work, coming home, cooking, eating, reading, playing games. learning, acting, fucking up, trying to do better next time.

taking care of a dear friend with chronic fatigue/pain issues.

what I want to do with my life: write more, spend more time with friends, find community.
I’m really good at
food (giving, receiving); banter (giving, receiving, watching); ridiculous hats and other headgear (receiving, wearing)
The first things people usually notice about me
eyes, eyelashes, lips, piercings, belly.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
books are my primary venue for entertainment and information. i read a lot, leaning hard towards genre fiction, but it's not my only bag, and i haven't read enough Game of Thrones or Harry Potter to be emotionally invested in either one.

i like comics a lot, though i'm pretty much over superheroes (Squirrel Girl notwithstanding). Love & Rockets, Finder, and Usagi Yojimbo are perennial faves. last year, I discovered Tove Jannson's Moomin comics and got hooked.

the last movie i saw in-theater was Rogue One. my favorites of all time are probably Young Frankenstein and Better Off Dead.

i own a tv but i don't watch it much. the only thing i've watched religiously in the past five years is Steven Universe. i like Supergirl and Bob's Burgers, too. i like sitcoms best as clips on youtube. i'm really averse to gore and idiot plotting, so i don't watch Game of Thrones or Walking Dead.

i listen to a little of everything, including rap and country.

food's good, i'll have some.

goodreads //

some things I'm gonna judge you for: Ayn Rand; Ernest Cline; the Big Bang Theory; "everything except rap and country"; non-medical aversion to vegetables; I'm-not-feminist-because-I-believe-in-equality; "sapiosexual" when what you mean is "i prefer conventionally hot people who are also grammar prescriptivists"; #gamergate; how you treat animals, children, and service employees
Six things I could never do without
oral/dental hygiene; reliable hydration; books with elves, spaceships, or space elves; multiple pockets; good insoles; an efficient postal system.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
snacks; what to cook; what to eat and where; games of many kinds; gnarly sci-fi and fantasy art; comics; games; what I'd do if I won the lottery; my personal (a)gender expression; how much space to occupy; self-assertion as an act of vulnerability; vulnerability as an act of self-assertion; social justice in a cruel culture; how to live more gently in an increasingly hostile world.
On a typical Friday night I am
stalking the elusive chocodile.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have never eaten a chocodile, and now it seems unlikely that I ever will.

agender: all my life, my heroes have mostly been heroines and I draw strength and inspiration from their examples. the traits I value in others and try to develop in myself (e.g. competence, compassion, resilience, vulnerability) don't carry gendered weight, they're just my go-to tools for navigating the world. so I'm a little bit of one and a little more of the other and carry trace elements of every but mostly I'm none at all. gender is a performance and I dislike singing for my supper.

(ethical) non-monogamy/polyamory: i believe in accepting love where and when and in whatever form it occurs, and giving back as best as I can. I'm not that interested in kitchen table poly. maybe gaming table poly. in practice, I tend to focus on one relationship while crushing a lot, often unrequitedly.

i don't know where else to put this, but: i don't know if i have the energy to date much further south than Laurel or Columbia MD. I commute to DC four days a week for ten-hour shifts, and it takes a lot out of me, and i'm not sure i can drive that far or further on an off day unless you're down with nap dates or Sunday morning brunch/dim sum dates. (totally message me if you're down with nap dates, regardless of distance/location)
You should message me if
you only have excellent ideas;

your schedule is weird but flexible;

you like small plates, fancy drinks, cheap books, thrift stores, cult video, and 7/10-rated video games;

you’re down with George Clinton, the Grateful Dead, Grimes, and Godspeed You! Black Emperor and everything in-between;

your relationship timeline & hierarchy resemble fractals or old-school dungeon maps;

you don’t dig on this but you have a friend you want to set me up with;

you believe that existence is naturally unfair and thus have little to no interest in preserving nature or acting naturally in that respect;

you have chocodiles and are willing to share;

you're down with nap dates (see above);

you enjoy reading aloud and being read to;

you want a mix tape.

keywords: nerdy; queer; femme; androgynous; enby/non-binary/agender; solo poly; chocodiles
The two of us