38The Bronx, United States
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My self-summary
Okay long story short and I mean long story because my profile keeps growing every year I do not find my keeper. If this profile was a tumor I think I'd be dead by now so before I start resorting to dirty looks and harsh language.. Crap that's most new Yorkers I think I'll give this one more try at maximum effort and see if anybody bites... And actually hold them long enough for me to reel them in if you're interested in LOL moments and aww moments keep reading if this wet your appetite enough to meet for coffee in a public place and save yourself about the next I don't know 5 minutes or so let's talk or message I should say. Oh and don't worry I'm not worried about the fact that you have a black van and you have a penchant for selling the kidneys of the men you pick up in Starbucks. Don't worry I got this
Ok I'm going to grab the wheel here and put what and who I want if it sounds like you then I'll love telling you about me on a real date. I know what the title says I'm not stupid. I just do what I like and like what I do and you just might like it too. I miss getting the butterflies when she calls, or when I bring her flowers because I feLt like it. Walking through the city after way too many drinks as the sun rises, wundering what the f*#$& did we do all night and why's my shirt backwards. And not giving a dam because we just enjoyed each other. Giving her my jacket in the rain wile making out as if we were in the shower. The scent of her perfume on my shirt at the end of the nigh, that drives me crazy and makes me want her more. The kind words, the soft touches. Holding hands, stealing long passionate kisses at the most inappropriate time while pretending no one sees. Being a sholder to cry on, having someone to tell me it'll get better. I'm a strong man but I need someone to apeal to my softer side. That one true friend that's always there when the shit hits the fan, to hand me a towel. the one that makes me the meanest pb&j when I get food poisoning. That woman that deserves the world and doesn't know it yet. It's bosible that she could do better then me but she thinks I'm the best man for her, and she'll show me why she's the best woman for me.
If you want to hear my self summary I'll tell you, but only if you really want to know me and I want to share all of me with you. If what I wrote sounds apealing to you lets talk.
A little about me I'm divorced and have a son that lives with my ex. If you want to know more ask me.
I'm not into endlessly emailing or texting, I'm looking to meet. Eyes and body Langeuage can go a long way.
If we do chat and it goes well I'd like to just hang out see what the vibe is between us. It's hard to tell on line, some things just have to be done in person, so I'd like to do something low key, no pressure just to know each other then see where we want things to go.
Sometimes I can seem way more serious then I really am, but once I'm comfortable with a person I drop my guard. I'm laid back and easy to get along with, if I want you to stick around.
Contact me at 79gabe on kik
What I’m doing with my life
Taking care of my son. Living it. Setting new goals and smashing any roadblocks that get in my way Looking for my sweetheart Trying to enjoy the little things
Starting a new chapter in my life
dusting myself off when life knocks me on my ass... And going for another round
As if my profile isn't long enough I am grabbing the wheel again and going in a different direction. Since Cupid took away the broadcast option I'm going to use this little spot here as my soapbox. I work a lot and I spend time time with my son but when I am NOT doing either and want to reach out to someone else who has time to kill and is intrigued by my profile and wants to get to know me and meet for coffee and is not too afraid that she will end up on a milk carton and actually wants to meet in the real world not just here on the interwebs
I’m really good at
cooking (no one's died yet)
giving advice
Acting way more mature than I am... And then completely screwing it up by making a fart joke or some other sort of improper comment
Using my big boy words
things that would make your mama blush
making women piss on them selves from laughter or shoot stuff out of their noses, That's hot
Sniffing out the bullshitters.
I can eat a big mac in 4 bites
Being a friend
Putting on my pants two legs at a time
Looking at the world with new eyes once I learned everything I was told was a bunch of bull taking it like a champ but still not liking it I'm waiting for everyone else to wake up and stop being sheeple
Back/foot rubs (not at the same time unless you're flexible or really freaky)
random trivia questions
Stock picking
Matching wine and foods
Eating 10 hotdogs with the works and 3 shiskabobs with copious amounts of cherry coke during a lazy sunday of foot ball
belting out my favorite rock tunes in the shower
The first things people usually notice about me
My dark eyes. I look and sound anything but puertorican. I'm tall .how I always spot random things to make fun of. The fact that the stupidest things travel at the speed of light from the childish side of my brain then right out of my mouth. I can have a dark sense of humor at times. Anything else you can tell me if we meet
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
These are a few of my favorite things
when I am NOT screaming to the top of my lungs like a rockstar I enjoy the script parachute and maroon 5 you know that kind of stuff your mom listens to when she's walking through a Walmart aisle
Rock music although I like other genres rock fits my soundtrack to life
Whiskey chased with beer
complete unadulterated Passion
Chinese lunch special on weekends
Women with good posture, women that slouch aren't sexy
Good bbq or soul food despite the fact that I've never been to the south, I'll put my greens up against your moms
Romance & someone worth being romantic with
Wine & good stimulating company
Football real football not that pre season crap
Honesty and sanity although crazy has its place and purposes that's for a later discussion
Favorite news paper investor business daily
If you're a Frank Sinatra fan you should definitely contact me
Here's a few favorites at the moment my heart is open maroon 5 man that can't be moved still remains Stone Temple Pilots Amy Winehouse to know him is to love him and kiss me slowly
Deadpool just made it onto my really like a lot list let's just say That's My Kind of Love Story harsh language and occasionally occurring nude scene aside
Six things I could never do without
Not much of a need stuff kind of guy. More of a people person. But I do like some stuff. But 6 is such a cheap number. Cupid you cheap &%$$?. Sorry just think I'm worth more then 6 things. Plus I'm an American if I want more than 6 I'll get more than 6
Coffee, few things piss me off worse then bad coffee, it would make me wonder about your place in modern society if you burned coffee
Whiskey and a cold beer
Wine or brandy when I have someone to scratch my romantic itch
ice cold Grey goose, maybe with red bull if we feel frisky
Music, conversation intelligent witty or hurt my stomach funny
Affection giving & receiving
Adrenaline & someone that'll make it fill my veins
Liberty truth and the pursuit of happiness even if my outcome is not guaranteed I earnedld it!!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
What to to with my hair
Is the woman I'm looking for looking for me too
Who invented iced coffee and why do people drink this oxymoron of a beverage
Why whenever I hear a plumber talk about his P trap or his long nipples it makes me chuckle and I don't mean in the hey there sailor type of way
Why did God have to make the pig such a delicious yet deadly animal. Clogging my arteries after filling my belly you have to be freakin kidding me you are a cruel cruel mistress Piggy
How much we have failed the Next Generation and how much our powers that should not be have failed us
If there's going to be a World War 3 and I'm pretty sure there is going to be one I'm wondering can we please sit this one out because something tells me there will be nothing left to fight with but sticks stones and harsh language although I do love harsh language I don't think it's a very effective tool
new ways to make fun of the song since you been gone and I'm not going to write you a love song
Why women say they can't find a good man. My reply is you wouldn't know a good man if he bit you in the ass. But then if I beat women in the ass I would end up with a bunch of sexual harassment claims against me so I refrain from that kind of action... Well with strangers at least
Here are some quotes that I often find evokes thought especially in these crazy times we live in listen to all follow none and those who would trade freedom for safety deserve neither and last but probably not least since I keep adding stuff on this profile of mine a man who believes in nothing will fall for anything chew on that and maybe get back to me
I can go from thinking about geopolitics or economics to fart jokes faster than you can change your socks
How not OK I am with the fact that I am going to hand off to my son a country that is less free and less prosperous and last but not least less safe then the country I grew up in and if you feel the same I probably definitely want to get to know you if you pay them no mind we could probably have coffee together
On a typical Friday night I am
usually working but I would much more prefer hanging out and committing acts of shenanigans and debauchery
I've been getting a lot of likes from outside of the five boroughs. I don't drive but if you wanted to come to the city for a day / week and you are not an axe murderer or a I poisoned my last two ex husbands type of gal perhaps arrangements could be made
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Let me wisper gently into your ear as my lips gently brush by your ear lobe. I'm the beast looking for his beauty
I took a personality test then it said I was ESTP so for all you ladies who say they are INTJ you're not the only one that can take a personality test
But in the interest of full disclosure I have a quick wit,
I used to have a halo but then it caught on fire from dancing a little too close to the flames
My time is very valuable to me and I only partially mean in the dollar sense. I have a son I love very much first and foremost and I work a lot so any time I can spend with my kid not be at work and possibly just sit on the couch trying not to think about the world rotting around me is priceless so I would like to spend that time with someone as romantically inclined as me greens would also be a delicious side to go along with the main dish
I probably don't want to be your homeboy but maybe you're really in the market for a man
Sharp tongue when needed
Good heart always
Dirty mind when appropriate
I like to kiss often and passionately, I love to cuddle whenever I get the chance
I only chase those that want me to catch them. If the courtship is one way I'll just go away and roll my dice with another hopefully more interested woman
I've been single for about 5 years now on and off, I think I've been on timeout long enough
If you rate me after reading my profile and looking at my pics maybe reading my answers to the questions I answered and you still don't have a conversation starter just say hi and maybe I'll see a reason to message you and meet if we're so inclined
I don't have a type I'm more of a case by case type of guy
No woman that I've dated ended up on a milk carton or missing persons flier.... Honest.....really.....I swear
I am looking for someone to love from her lips to her hips all the way down to her pinky toes.
I want someone I can love inside as well as out your looks are merely the dessert after what I hope is a four course meal.and if you're the right person I can assure you I will clean my plate, and yours too. and if you're a good girl I'll let you have some wine.
I love a woman that can rock a pair of heels
You should message me if
Your brain is your most beautiful asset and your head is not just for wearing pretty hats that match your outfit
You think you could be the woman I wrote about in my summary
You did not answer no to the question do I want my partner to be kinkier than me or something to that effect. I think that would be the third rail event borderlining on blasphemy
Your presence is like a gentle breeze caressing me
you are more fun than a TSA Patdown
You don't mind that I'm a divorced dad.
You like puertorican men hint to the non Hispanic women yes my sights are braud
You're not too bashful if something I wrote resonated with you I would not think you were too forward in messaging me first. you know what they say a closed mouth doesn't get fed.if I like you back I will respond
You're looking for friends first, then if the sparks are there maybe more
You're not hung up on your ex
You're funny, caring and one hell of a good time
You're comfortable in your own skin
Passion is important to me, so please have some
You know that ignorance isn't bliss
You have a soft & soothing demeanor that can soothe even the most savage beast
Your beauty radiates from within, not just from your appearance
Your sensuality can be felt across a packed room
You can stimulate mentally, romantically and physically
You want to and are willing to invest the time to get to know each other and develop a relationship
You think there could be chemistry
I won't tolerate crazy lazy or stupi"d
you are no longer happy with your status quo and are looking to make changes
you are also looking for the catalyst of a this is the start of our new lives moment
You're looking For love, lust and companionship.
You like discussing topics that are way above most people's pay grade
You can make everyday smell like morning dew and taste like Cherry Starburst
And probably not last and certainly not least you think you be my kind of girl
something you read or saw struck a chord and you are interested
you're not still pissed that after reading this whole profile I was the only thing found in the bottom of the box
The two of us