Profession: Tied to a desk
Weight: Don't you fucking dare.
Availability: Incredibly single.
I stopped giving a fuck a long time ago. Don't waste my time.
*in the style of Rihanna*
Remembering actors names.
Knowing everything about Harry Potter.
Quoting movies you've never seen.
Angry all the time.
Ass so fat.
American Horror Story
Anything bingeworthy on Netflix.
Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World
Night At the Roxbury
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Wristcutters: A Love Story
Anything directed by Quentin Tarantino
John Green stuff.
Kurt Vonnegut stuff.
I don't read as much as I used to. That's sad.
My right hand
My glasses (contacts will suffice)
Shoes that don't require laces
My kitten, Bane.
"I'm pretty sure there's a lot more to life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking. And I plan on finding out what that is."
"Brick killed a guy...."
"I'm nobody's trophy, Goose"
"That's why momma named you Joe Dirt instead'a Nunamaker."
"Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a fucked-up girl who's lookin' for my own peace of mind; don't assign me yours."
"I can fit my whole fist in my mouth. wanna see?"
Name these quotes.
Hit me up seriously. I'm so bored.
Disclaimer: If your first message has anything to do with...
1) A body part, yours or mine,
2) any implication of sex or inappropriate content,
3) Something you would not say in front of your mother or your daughter; or would not wish someone to say to your mother or daughter
...you will NOT get a positive response, but i assure you, you will get a response.