I know I'm being a dumbass here but I'm looking for a woman I can share my interests with. In other words, I'm looking for a woman with compatible interests. My interests are generally along the lines of tech, tech art as in creative coding, arduino, tech based museum installations, AR, VR, game development, web/app development, etc... Of course I like lots standard activities. I love travel, food, friends, parties, movies, museums, and I want to do all of that. The same stuff all profiles list. But, those non standard things are the ones that really float my boat, push my buttons, get me excited, trigger my passion.
Sure I can hear you thinking "how selfish. he should want to be interested in my interests" and I agree, I'm not looking for a clone. But, at the same time I am looking for a best friend and I can't imagine not being able to share my interests with my best friend. Most women, especially women near my age, have zero interest in the things above. I imagine the typical reaction from those kinds of women. It's the weekend and after lunch she's like "okay hun, go ahead and do your geek stuff. I'll be here reading my book". Yuck! That's sooooooo sad!!! I'd not just sad it's upsetting to hear that kind of response where you know you're being dismissed instead of embraced. I dream of meeting someone who would instead say "Let's make that thing together!" I meet a few women in their 20s that have similar interests but I'm not looking for a woman that young so I'm kind of feeling like I'm looking for a unicorn.
And yet, I meet them, of course they are always taken. I don't want to post actual links but for example I met a couple recently and saw the woman's blog. On it she describes playing video games together with her BF, making video games with her BF (she's a programmer). Together they make a podcast. Together they talk to their podcast fans and find gifts for them. They live outside the USA and I guess their podcast is about their experiences. Together they have a patreon. She draws comics about their life. How can I not want a relationship like that? I've met several others.
The older I get the more I feel like have to settle. Like I should just find some "nice" girl but who I have almost nothing in common with. We'll share basic conversation over meals. We'll watch TV and or movies together. We'll travel. Maybe we'll make some common interests like cooking lessons or raising a dog but when those are done we'll go back to our personal interests instead of back to sharing the interests we're actually passionate about.
So, how do I find that woman where we can not only share our passions but because we have common interests we are also passionate about each other's interests?
You'd probably think that's unrealistic and I don't disagree and yet every few months I meet a couple who shares all of that and I'm sooooo jealous.
And so I keep looking....
I quit my job ~48 months ago when a friend asked me why I was staying at a job I found frustrating. That made me realize she had a point. I had no reason to be at that job. I had plenty of savings. I could leave and unless there's a big change in the job landscape I don't think I'd have a problem finding another job (and in fact just a few weeks ago my old boss tried to re-hire me)
And so here I am, anchorless. It's a strange feeling. Most people have some reason to stay in one place. Family, kids, job are probably the most common reasons. Well, my family is in 3 different states. No kids .. yet? Job .. see above.
Ideally I'd like to find a place I "belong", a person to belong to, and an activity that really sets me on fire.
I landed in California in July 2014 which is where I'm from. I got sucked into an artist in residence roll at the UCLA. I made some tech they are interested in using for projects and for their classes and so they asked me to come hangout. After that I was in SF for 3 weeks and well then it was all over the place.
I'm currently in Tokyo making an effort to settle in Tokyo although dang both Kyoto and Berlin are very tempting
I previously worked at the big G for 5 years and before that made videogames for like forever. First game I made was Centipede for C64. I've made games for NES (ファミコンゲームも制作したことがある）Yea, I'm old skool! I've also made PS3/XBox360 games fer the youngins' :P
Recently I'd really like to find a reason to stop and plant roots again. Maybe you could be one of those reasons ;)
Shows: Assuming that means TV I don't watch a whole lot of TV. One day in like 2007 I had cable. About 11am I thought "I'll watch like 30 minutes and then go out". Next time I checked the time it was 6pm. I immediately cancelled my cable and haven't had it since. No Netflix for the same reason. That said I have watched a few shows recently. GoT, Walking Dead, Breaking Bad. I can't actually say I'm a fan of any of them though. I mostly just like hanging out with friends. Most recent binge watches were "The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt", "Mr Robot", "Jessica Jones". Best show in a long time, "Rick and Morty". Favorite shows of all time though would include The West Wing and One Piece (15 years and still going strong)
Music: My favorite songs in the last 9 months. "Birthday" by Katy Perry, "Slolove" by Janet Jackson, "Livin My Love" by Steve Aoki, "Clap" by Wolfgang Gartner, "I Wanna Be Evil" by Eartha Kitt, "New Kind of Kick" by The Cramps. Please give me some recommendations. Rhapsody, Pandora, Spotify, iTunes Radio, Soma.fm, are all failing me. I like mostly everything more or less. I've got lots of Big Band / Swing music. Old Vocals like Sinatra or Tom Jones. Lots of Trip Hop and music that's harder to classify like the Supreme Beings of Leisure, Bitter:Sweet, Cibo Matto, Caro Emerald.
Food: I consider myself somewhat of a foodie. Trying to suppress the snob in me since the better food I eat the more disappointing it is to eat mediocre food ;) If I could I would probably try a new place every day. There's so many to pick from. Would also love to cook more. I used to cook every Wednesday for friends but that stopped after I moved to Japan. Would love to take more lessons. Would you? Have you heard about hipster toast? If you had to make some what would be on it?
My lucky orange shirt
My camera strap
My power supply
The other private thing I'm willing to tell you is that I rarely RARELY write any women on any dating site. I have no idea why. If I was to guess it's because 39 times out of 40 I think I'm probably not the guy you're looking for. If your profile says you want a fit guy or an athletic guy or guy that watches his health well that's not me. I'm not fat nor unhealthy and I try to get some exercise but I'm far from religious about it. I'm happy to have a salad but I'd much rather have lechon kawali or a laulau and poi than anything vegetarian.
I generally fall for women who are cute to me, fun, and a little more outgoing/aggressive than me such that I feel comfortable quickly.
If dogs 🐕 make you happy, if laughing kids make you smile 😀, if you're amazed at how this great big universe works 🌙☀️⭐️, if new tech excites you 💻📱, if being inside can be just as fun as being outside, if you like working on personal projects, if you see computers as enablers of millions of activities and not as an activity in and of themselves, and if you play a video game once in awhile.👾
And finally if you're written something unique in your profile.