25Comstock Park, United States
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My self-summary
I expect my eminent future to go a little like this:

I will work at WalMart scrubbing shitters and purposely misdirecting customers who are the essence of "insulting" and "barbaric" while dwelling in a greasy little apartment with 36 mean and mangy cats and a daily fifth of the cheapest and most atrocious hard liquor to keep me company...and I will continue to write run-on sentences.

About my current self:

1. There is some part of me that feels completely at ease when walking on the floor of a forest. I love nature.

2. I am not one of those people who is constantly speaking. I enjoy silence, solitude, and serenity on occasion.

3. I like adventure.

4. I am shy, believe it or not. There are common misconceptions about me based on this, such as 1) I am snotty and arrogant, 2) I am boring and have nothing interesting to say (or else I would say it), 3) I am constantly judging everyone around me, 4) I am a complete doofus, 5) I am uptight and always offended by something, and 6) I am callous, calculating, and sneaky. These are far from the truth (#4 is debatable).

5. I have my own opinions and you have yours. That is nice.

6. I believe that people should be allowed to do as they please as long as no one is harmed in the process.

7. I am eccentric and would like to (but have no expectations) find someone similarly strange.
What I’m doing with my life
Finding things to keep me occupied until my heart no longer beats and my breath ceases to expel from my mouth (apparently I’m one of them mouth-breathers).
I’m really good at
Being awkward, avoiding, making lists, observing, high-fiving, listening, lying among the trees, acting a fool, napping, eating, corny joke-telling
The first things people usually notice about me
I have buck teeth, a greasy sheen to my skin, crossed eyes, and a stream of drool is constantly cascading down the left side of my face.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Hemingway, Kurt Vonnegut, Neil Gaiman, Richard Brautigan, George Orwell, A.L Attunes, Thoreau, Clive Barker, Arthur C. Clarke, Joseph Heller, Ray Bradbury, Phillip K. Dick, Nabokov, H.G Wells, H.P Lovecraft, Richard Adams, Robert Heinlein, Franz Kafka, Mark Z. Danielewski, Jack London, William Faulkner, Lewis Carol


Regina Spektor, Cat Power, Modest Mouse, Minutemen, Meat Puppets, Pink Floyd, Rolling Stones, Beatles, The Doors, The Who, Led Zeppelin, Joy Division, Grateful Dead, Rush, Bob Dylan, Jethro Tull, The Breeders, Pixies, Black Flag, Crass, Dead Milkmen, Feist, The Clash, The Germs, Husker Du, Radiohead, R.E.M, The White Stripes, The Strokes, Spoon, Muddy Waters, Skip James, WEird Al, The Kinks, Jonny Greenwood, The Slits, X-Ray Spex, Nirvana
Six things I could never do without
Foxy ladies
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Someone told me once that I "think too much." I decided this was a careless thing for them to say, wondered if it is better to not think enough than it is to "think too much," then decided that maybe I was thinking about it a little too much.
On a typical Friday night I am
Either picking scabs and braiding my dog's hair or watching the neighbors through their windows with binoculars in hand and a toothy grin pasted to my face.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
The most private thing I am willing to admit to a group of unknown, faceless strangers: I have a prisoner pen pal. He is intelligent, eloquent, kind, and in prison for life for murdering his wife.
You should message me if
...you wanna be pals!
The two of us