26Brighton, United States
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
Misanthropes unite!

I'm a recovering classicist. On a long hiatus from undergrad. I’m looking forward to finally getting that coveted slip of paper, the license to call myself ‘A.B.’, and being done with the whole sordid affair. Till then, I’ve left myself to my own devices, and am enjoying a life of hedonism and sloth.

Crossfit: totally addicted. Now that I'm no longer in school, it's the single thing that takes up the biggest chunk of my time.

Cuddling is the best. I hope you agree. Why is our culture so afraid of body contact?

When I'm with someone, I'm perfectly content to just let time pass for a while without words. This makes some people uncomfortable, for some reason.

I'm from Oakland originally, and sometimes I do feel culturally Californian more than East-Coaster. I often spend a couple months out of the year visiting the Bay Area.


Once I walked 12 miles through Wisconsin farmland for a day-trip and got bitten by a farmdog.

Polyamory/open relationship is my default mode. I sense, though, that might be willing to try monogamy if I was really head-over-heels smitten. But that hasn't happened in a long time.
What I’m doing with my life
Classics, belles-lettres, mind. Secularism. I want to teach and that's going to be my profession, probably. Academia is all well and good, but I have notsomuch interest in abstruse scholarship divorced from teaching.
I’m really good at
Dead languages. I also have a pretty good falsetto.
The first things people usually notice about me
I talk too fast. On the rare occasions when I do talk.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Favorite novel: probably ‘Middlemarch’ 😻

Favorite play: probably ‘Love’s Labour’s Lost’

Neal Stephenson kicks ass, though ‘Reamde’ was a slight disappointment. ‘Seveneves’ was better, but his high point is still the ‘Baroque Cycle’/‘Cryptonomicon’ tetralogy.

‘Calvin and Hobbes’ and Lewis Carroll shaped me in my tender formative years.

The Stone Dance of the Chameleon!

I’ve never read a book on anything but paper, and I probably never will.

Movies: black-and-white classics (Katharine Hepburn = goddess; ‘Witness for the Prosecution’, ‘Casablanca’, ‘Bringing Up Baby’, etc.); CLUE; science fiction. —Shows: 30 Rock, Battlestar Galactica. Doctor Who, Torchwood. Futurama. Archer, Bob’s Burgers. Orange Is the New Black, Childrens Hospital, Parks and Rec, Six Feet Under. Twin Peaks, Fawlty Towers. Not an anime person in general, but I loved Cowboy Bebop, Samurai Champloo, Attack on Titan. Know some other anime (aside from Miyazaki) that's high on artistic merit, low on sexualized preteen girls and other irritating anime tropes? Feel free to recommend!

Oh yeah, and Daria! Daria is definitely my rôle model.

When it comes to popular music of the past 50 years, I have a startling cultural illiteracy. Probe me about it sometime, you'll be impressed by how little I know. On the other hand, super-old music can capture me. Renaissance polyphony, Mozart’s symphonies, Beethoven’s late string quartets, and Bach’s organ works are among my casual obsessions. (I’m an enthusiast, but not really an aficionado.)

Food: Spicy is good. Meat is good. Food is good.

I play PC games too, sometimes. Games are the most exciting burgeoning new medium of creative expression to arise in our time. FTL and other cool indie stuff. Europa Universalis IV, Crusader Kings II. Infocom text adventures and retro-style point-and-clicks. Fallen London junkie (my two accounts are hwoosh and R Fellow Oswho; add me!).
Six things I could never do without
This space intentionally left blank.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
the nature of the self. The viability of a nontheistic objective morality. Prosody of dead languages. Meat. Typography! I *always* use en and em dashes correctly. And it's not a useless skill either: you wouldn't believe the money to be had in proofreading.

How much muscle I need to put on before I qualify to list myself as "Jacked" on OKCupid. ;)
On a typical Friday night I am
wallowing in my own filth
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Despite my interest in working out, I’m not sporty at all; I’m not exactly clumsy, but I have oddly poor body awareness, and I can't dance for shit.

I have congenital oligodontia. (And I like gratuitous fancy polysyllabic Graeco-Latinate words for things, too!)

Also, I have a cute little birthmark above my knee. And a sacral dimple. (TMI?)

Sometimes when I look at a person's face I see their skull and get really weirded out.
You should message me if
You think I seem like an oddball in an intriguing way rather than an off-putting way (there is clearly no middle option!). If you're open-minded, open-hearted, and mellow.

The phrase "hopeless romantic" makes me grind my teeth.

If you suffer from internalized homophobia, racism, transphobia, misogyny, machismo, smallmindedness, willful ignorance, narcissism, sanctimoniousness, an irrational fixation on monogamy, or a belief in astrology, then yes, I'm probably judging you. (But, if there's physical attraction, I'll probably still hook up with you. Such are the ways of the world.)
The two of us