janturbo
31 Ridgewood, United States
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janturbo
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My self-summary
First thing you should know is that I'm active practitioner of ethical non-monogamy. If you don't know what that is, feel free to ask (if Google happens to be down, that is).

Just out of an LTR. It didn't end in flames or anything, so I'd certainly consider myself emotionally available, but I figure it's good to disclose that here on internet so I don't have to awkwardly mention it on the first date.

My experience with non-monogamy has taught me that affection, generosity, nurturing and empathy are not finite resources (though sadly time and emotional energy are), so don't feel like I'm going to keep you at arm's length or be inconsiderate of your time and/or feelings.. if I am lucky enough to meet you, that is. (I wrote this when I was in a relationship with two serious partners, but it still stands now that I'm single, and if anything, it's currently more likely to apply to me than to you).

I'm vaguely aware that being a woman on this site can really suck, and that the straight men here are giving us all a bad name, what with the unsolicited dick pics, bad grammar (and bad breath that you can smell all the way through the internet). I could launch into a lengthy rant about how I'm definitely not one of those guys, but I'll let you be the judge of that.
What I’m doing with my life
Full time cookie morlock and part time duck schlepper. Clarification on what-the-hell these job titles actually mean available upon request.

I'm also in the process of becoming the Dude Ina Garten of Ridgewood, Queens. It's going pretty well, I just need to get a few cookbooks, TV shows, and cookware lines under my belt.
I’m really good at
Video Editing
Bicycle Riding (I'm a half decent wrench too)
Taking Public Transit in Foreign (and Domestic) Lands
Omelette Engineering
Makin' Out
Finding Stuff (The Secret is to Look Underneath Other Stuff)
Passing Tools to People
Capitalizing Most Words
The first things people usually notice about me
Glasses
Beard
A couple people have told me I'm reminiscent of Paul Rudd, but taller. A "Tall Rudd" if you will. Personally, I'd love for that to be true, but I just don't see it.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
GoodReads profile:
http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/11773673-jon-burton

Movies: Enter the Void, Citizen Kane, Anything Chaplin but particularly Modern Times and The Great Dictator, Persona, Pi, Wild At Heart, The Hudsucker Proxy, Underground, There Will Be Blood, Tetsuo The Iron Man, Paprika, Batteries Not Included, Sid and Nancy, Down By Law, Forest Gump II: Bubba's Revenge, Anything Pixar except "Cars," which I just haven't seen (and could be missing out?).

Music: Arcade Fire, Islands, Matt and Kim, Sleighbells, Yeaysayer, The Talking Heads, Japanther, Dragonforce, Ninjasonik, Harry Nilsson... So Much... Too Much... But Somehow Never Enough!
The six things I could never do without
A Decent Sized Stainless Steel Fry Pan
Oysters
Ramps (The wild, super-seasonal allium variant, not the thing people who are braver than me ride skateboards on)
Cats
Pups
My Family of Choice
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Now that I'm in my thirties, I see more profiles for lovely older women than I did when I was 29 because they set their minimum age to 30. Good move ladies! I'd probably set the same parameters if I dated guys (though as we all know, for most men, adolescence ends around the same time as the ability to chew solid food, amaright?!). What I guess I'm trying to say is that I'm happy to be here, and look forward to proving that sex and dating will only get better with age if we can all get past our culture's ridiculous Dorian Gray body standards!

Also:

Nanotechnology

Neoliberalism and How it's Smugly Ruining Everything

The Alt-Right and How They Just Turned Our World Upside Down and Even the Smug Neoliberals Don't Know What to Make of It

The Uncanny Valley

When's Elon Musk Gonna Announce the "Arthur C. Clarke Memorial Space Elevator"?!
On a typical Friday night I am
In bed because I gotta get up at the crack o' fuck to open the farmer's market in the morning.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've never driven a car or taken a driving lesson in my life. But I will soon, I promise.
You should message me if
You want to exchange witty banter.
You want to exchange witty pheromones.
You would pay a street musician to stop playing Sublime (We can probably still date if you like Sublime, but not to the level that I have to ever hear it or acknowledge that it was once a thing. Sorry, I have my reasons for this and I'll gladly discuss in person).
You don't mind seasonal facial hair.

Oh, and here's a deal for those of you who may want to message me, but are suddenly overcome by writer's block (this happens to me quite a bit, and I can't be the only one): Feel free to write a very brief (even single word) message ending in "Mayonnaise." This is partly to test if you've closely read my profile, and partly to give you an out for aforementioned writer's block.

And in case you zipped right to the bottom of my admittedly lengthy profile, please keep in mind that I'm non-monogamous (or "poly" - though I find that to be an imperfect descriptor, so I don't usually use it). If that's not a deal breaker, then bless you, and let's get to know each other!

I will be more likely to message you first if we have a high match rating, AND it say's you're open to open-relationships.

In fact I won't message anyone who says they're not open to non-monogamy, out of respect and common sense. That being said, if you fall into the category of folks interested or open to non-monogamy, but don't want to announce it on your online dating profile because you don't want family, friends, co-workers, or enemies to potentially see it, I totally get that, and I encourage you to reach out if you want to date me.
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