32Kansas City, United States
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My self-summary
Hey, I’m AJ. You’re already here, so keep reading. Most of the girls on this site are a waste of time. I make the best Bloody Marys and Barbecue you've ever had, I’m in IT so I can fix your computer, even if it is a fucking Mac. I spend my free time at the animal shelter, and I love 90s cartoons. If you’re horrible, this won’t work. If you don't like laughing and having a good time, this wont work. You’re getting 100s of messages on here a day, and they’re miserable. Here’s your chance – find something interesting, or don’t. Wasting time on a dating site is the worst. Don’t be a stranger…say Hi.

I'm laidback and easy going, but also brutally honest and sometimes painfully blunt. I'm hilarious, and outgoing and love making people laugh and have fun. I'm sarcastic and witty and love engaging in witty banter. I love going out and having a good time, ghostriding the whip, stackin' my chedda, kickin back 40z with the homies, all that good stuff that makes me certified on the street. Oh ya, and bangin' hammers at fools that look at me funny.

Serious note: I have lofty goals and aspirations and am looking for a lady who can come along for the ride, feel free to ride my coattails to an unprecedented level of success, or bring your own and lets combine ours like the kids from captain planet...

I'm down to earth, spontaneous, love being active and being outdoors, going hunting, fishing, camping, running, working out, going to the bar, watching sports, movies, music, tv, intellectual conversation, and anything that can be described as fun and exciting

I'm a momma's boy at heart, my mother raised me well and taught me how to treat a lady with the utmost respect. I've never cheated on a girl and never will, not my style and i don't like to hurt ladies, guys I could care less, that's just me being the badass I am. I can be incredibly sarcastic and witty and have an awesome sense of humor. Most of my friends would describe me as hilarious witty extremely intelligent always having fun and most of all the life of the party.

I love making a girl smile and i'm a hopeless romantic...but I can also go with the flow and just have an amazing time doing whatever, like bustin' caps and g-checkin' thugs. Or maybe going out to get dinner and cocktails...whatever floats your boat.

I am Hilarious, Outgoing, and Sarcastic
What I’m doing with my life
I do IT. I'm a computer nerd. I work with people who do LARP, they're fucking ridiculous.
I’m really good at
Writing horrendously offensive and sexually explicit rap songs about your beautiful characteristics. Knocking over tables of OJ and Bagels at job interviews. Youtube 90's R&B Battles. Giving Amazing birthday presents. Jenga. Boxing. Eating Cake. Watching TV while driving. Holding my breath.Capitalizing Jenga. Intimidating your clingy ex boyfriends that for some nutjob reason you still keep in touch with. Making people laugh, obviously. One of these was a lie.
The first things people usually notice about me
I'm tall and I have a beard. People ask me if I've ever wrestled a bear, and I tell them "Only one of us made it out of that Glacial Chasm Alive..."
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
favorite books are definitely catcher in the rye a separate piece lone survivor the 9/11 commission report winning every day by lou holtz anything by john grisham or tom clancy and the lexus and the olive tree by thomas friedman
Six things I could never do without
my phone - always up on the texting and calling, seeing where my product is and how much money my money is making for me.
ps3 I don't get to do it often, but when I can I enjoy a bit of gaming, at the least watching some blurays in hi-def that looks so good it will blow your mind.
tv - Love catching up on DVR after a long week. Takes my mind off things and entertains me, what's better than that?
sex - who can? Unless you're a nun, I'm not buying it...you don't have to put it on your list...just saying i'm a fan of bluntness and brutal honesty. The homies say I keep it realer than real.
beer - I enjoy cracking open a cold one or drinking some whiskey to relax and have a good time. Sorry for partying, NOT.
football - I am a sports fanatic and college football might be one of the most important things in my life...Sorry for being a Man, BABY!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How the hipster squad on here needs to pump the brakes on the obscure book references and verbosity. We all know you haven't read those books...

My next trip overseas.

When is the next time I'm going to be able to smoke a rack of ribs or some other form of Kansas City style bbq I miss so much.
On a typical Friday night I am
Going out and Evangelical praise dancing to a live funk band at a bar. Enjoying copious amounts of kentucky bourbon. Going duckpin bowling in the ghetto. Jamming out to good tunes. Hanging out with friends by a fire while we make smores. Signing into OKCupid and laughing that I'm signing into OKCupid.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
It really upsets me when I craft the perfect bite of salad with all the ingredients on one bite, and a crouton, or tomato, or cucumber decides to excuse itself from said bite, and I have to start allllllllllllllll over again :(
You should message me if
you like what you see and what you've read

If you believe chivalry isn't dead, and enjoy a man that is the definition of an alpha male...If you're into emo, skinny jean dudes, feel free to not apply

You're a girl with looks and brains, nerdy/geeky/dorky chicks please apply, as long as you're sexy to go with it, or you're just plain too hot to handle.

you are sarcastic, witty, well read, smart, funny, have a gorgeous smile, love having a good time and feel like laughing til you cry

If you think people watching is a legitimate hobby....I definitely do

You have an amazing smile and can brighten my day with it while I make you laugh until you cry.

IF you know where the saying "You're killing me smalls" came from..bonus points...I use it all the time and that movie is an integral part of my life lol
The two of us