36Oakland, United States
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My self-summary
I should probably start by saying that my username, "hatzalam", means "the photographer" in Hebrew. It does not mean "hot salami", even though that's hilarious. I'm culturally Jewish but I'm an agnostic atheist; too bad OKcupid doesn't give the granularity to religion that it does with gender. My sense of humor could be described as sarcastic and dry, but sometimes it's damned obnoxious. I often have trouble with the typical Californian sense of humor.

My manager at work told me the other day that he can't figure me out. I am totally okay with this.

I'm not always politically correct, and have been known to occasionally grind some people's gears. For work, I do IT for of those "unicorns" in SF. No, I am not a "brogrammer"; I don't code at all. I wouldn't classify myself as a techie, but maybe I am? Besides all that, I'm sort of a cross between a world-weary old man, and a child staring up at the night sky. In other words, I ain't your average joe.

Also, I have an awesome dog, a 2-year-old Alaskan Malamute that's got a terrifically sweet and mellow personality. But seriously, though, he's much more endearing than me.

I waver from thinking the following is pop psychology nonsense to being real, but I have wavered between INTJ and INFJ on the ol' MBTI.
What I’m doing with my life
Doing the startup/tech thing in SF, and living in Oakland. Being the best dog owner I can be. Having a BFA in photography that I rarely get to use anymore, with the exception of taking badge photos at work and Instagram.

(But my Instagram is pretty good, if I do say so myself.)
I’m really good at
singing Purple Rain, Elton John, and Pearl Jam at karaoke bars. Also, I like to think that I'm pretty good at the following: photography, writing, reading, creating variations in the key of C, and travelling off the beaten path.
The first things people usually notice about me
My winning personality. Oh, and my height, or something like that.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
TL;DR version:

Desert Island picks:
Music: Bach piano music played by Glenn Gould
Books: A few Kundera and Marquez books
Movie: Amadeus, Casablanca, and The Big Lebowski.
Food: Pad Thai

Long version:

Aimee Mann, Andrew Bird, Arcade Fire, J.S. Bach, Belle and Sebastian, Beirut, Bon Iver,Broken Social Scene, David Broza, Coldplay, Coltrane, The Cure, Johnny Cash, Miles Davis, Nick Drake, Brian Eno, Ella Fitzgerald, David Gray, Iron & Wine, Mozart, Michael Penn, Puccini, Radiohead, Damien Rice, Ron Sexsmith, The Shins, Sigur Ros, Sufjan Stevens, Mum, Springsteen, The Tallest Man on Earth,the whole Wainwright family, and my idol, Bob Dylan.


Amadeus, The Thin Red Line, The Big Lebowski, Casablanca, Blade Runner, Children of Men, The Unbearable Lightness of Being


The Book of Laughter and Forgetting, One Hundred Years of Solitude, Leaves of Grass, Franny and Zooey, The Dispossessed, Invisible Cities. Pretty much anything by Kundera, Marquez, and Salinger.


ST:TNG 4 LIFE. Also, X-files, The Wonder Years, South Park, House, Cosmos (the OG Carl Sagan one), Archer
Six things I could never do without
My Alaskan Malamute, a camera, Radiolab, piano music, tea, and a really nice pillow.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I love me some existential angst. But really,
I love thinking about:
geography, astronomy, architecture, humanism, poetry, Sartre and Heidegger, hedonism, Nietzsche, and how technology really is a double-edged sword these days.
On a typical Friday night I am
It used to be: going out to dinner or drinks with friends. Possibly in the city, possibly around here.
Nowadays, it's playing with my dog, and going to bed early. I think they call it "adulting".
You should message me if
if you can sing and/or play a musical instrument and want to collaborate on some songs.

If you love dogs.

if you can teach me new things.

if you have a witty, sarcastic sense of humor.

and, obviously,
if you're awesome.
The two of us