katastrofei
36Salinas, United States
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katastrofei
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My self-summary
((Your challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to message me a 3-5 word date plan. I believe in you.))

tl;dr: Looking for a domme, an lg, a kinkster, a Pokémon Go partner and/or an M:TG/ D&D group.

I laugh often, and have inherited my mom's hyena-esque manner of doing so. I go to the gym so that I can eat more cupcakes. My dimples are fierce, but not very intimidating. I poke badgers with spoons. Country music feels me with equal parts joy and facepalm. I am a complete sucker for strategy games. I refuse to let go my childhood wonder, and fiercely believe in the importance of silliness.

I'm polyamorous, which is fairly key to my character. For the uninitiated, this means that I believe being in love and loving on more than one person concurrently is healthy, sustainable and fun. I'm looking for someone who will snuggle up with me when watching movies (or Netflix) and make equally squeeky noises when excited.

Also of note is the fact that I will most assuredly make some not especially oblique reference to your mom, sex, how good it was, and quite possibly illustrate the point with hand puppets and funny voices.

My chief joy in life, apart from cupcakes, is travel. My next trip will be to The Cold Northern Places. Halp.

I also have a Fetlife profile. Interested parties can find me under the moniker Wanderlust_Written.

I am nerdcore, gender-bendy, and latitudinarian
What I’m doing with my life
Rocking it. I travel, I work, I eat brunch.

I love to adventure, here and abroad, and would love to have partners in crime for these endeavors. Bonus points if you control a legion of undead.
I’m really good at
Rolling 20's. Magic: The Gathering, especially EDH. Being an open minded perv. Snuggling. Massaging. Eating cupcakes. Watching movies or awesome TV shows while concurrently practicing the former three (four?). Writing personalized erotica. Adventuring. Teaching people the proper form for a rear naked choke. Losing at Dominion.
The first things people usually notice about me
My hair: it is long, flowing and temperamental.

Or, if I am in a shorter skirt or tight pants, my ass. All that bouncing around has a bonus effect. Or maybe it's because I keep "accidentally" dropping things I have to then pick up.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like...books. My tolerance of lit crit is pretty low, but apart from that, my bookshelf runs the gamut from Illiad to The Giver to Diary of a Wombat to Snowcrash to Small Gods to Best American Erotica 2009 to Kushiel's Dart to 1984 to Poisonwood Bible, to Water for Elephants to World World Z, to Ready Player One...

I also like movies. And, uhm, music, come to think of it. Look, just come to my place and take a look at my various libraries and you'll understand what I'm trying to convey. Move aside that second Aqua CD and you'll uncover Lars and the Real Girl, which is holding up the shorts collection from the HP Lovecraft Film Festival, in turn precariously balanced on Oldboy. I'm pretty much a media slut.

I can eat you under the table. It's like drinking someone under the table, only with more pho, hamburgers, burritos, katsu, alischa tibs, ramen, pie, cupcakes and good ole fashioned pb&j involved.
Six things I could never do without
Books! Curse their delicious, knowledge saturated pages!

Touch. I need it like others need sun. I love to massage. No happy endings on the first date, no matter how big your puppy cat eyes.

My passport. My old one filled up, so I had to get a new one a few months ago, so now I must quest for more passport stamps. MOAR!

Dancing. I'm keen to shake my booty.

Intellectual discourse. All ducks have two legs. All humans have two legs. All ducks are human. Discuss.

Silliness. While I agree there is a time and place for serious discussions and somber-rain-spattered-battles-to-the-pain, there is ALWAYS time for butt smacks, frosting battles and funny voices.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The exchange rate where I want to travel. Kink scenes. Whether or not I should eat that second helping (uhm... or fourth). What line for DR HORRIBLE is most appropriate for the current situation. Interaction matrices for hormones, enzymes and neurotransmitters. How much time I can afford to waste browsing Imgur.
On a typical Friday night I am
Crashed out watching a Really Bad, Really Entertaining movie, or perhaps participating in some nerding.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
My goosebump threshold is embarrassingly low.

Given that I am predisposed to ladies who have a well developed and curvaceous posterior, I am incapable of uttering untruths.
You should message me if
You can and WILL compose a message that is comprised of more than "Lol your [sic] cute lol."

You can take me in a fight.

You can do pullups without assistance.

You are a dirty pervert and wanna share/explore that side of yourself.

You are intrigued by the seeming juxtaposition of my manly demeanor and nerdy verbiage.

You can name 6 Planeswalkers.

You will share your 3 favorite porn scenes with me. Because science. For research.

You think bubble tea and debating what fictional badass could possibly defeat Ip Man is a good date.

You understand what's happening at least 75% of the time in XKCD.

You are a snuggleslut.

You love costume parties. We throw one a month, at least.

You need more than one hand to count the number of places you've been, or are desperately keen to.

You are interested in meeting up for conversation in real life. Internet chatting is handy, but it's difficult to get an appropriate sense of a person over the intertubes.
More
The two of us
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Dating
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Lifestyle
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Ethics
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Other
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Sex
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Religion