kickorguard
35 Brooklyn, United States
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kickorguard
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My self-summary
Living in Brooklyn and working in Manhattan. Thank god for the N train. I go to indie concerts and if the band is good I will buy their vinyl. I own a wii and ps4. I eat cereal in the middle of the night. Back To The Future started an obsession with scifi comedies. I do not have cable but subscribe to Hulu and Netflix. I love strong coffee and it is espresso. (Expresso is the spanish version of a female clothing chain in a mall.) I have no preference over macs or pcs. My job requires me to know both inside and out. I do prefer android over iphone. I just do not understand why you would want to pay for free apps? I have been wearing converse since the 90s and probably always will. Love to joke/laugh and will only be serious when necessary. (Please note that sometimes I do need to be told when it is necessary.) I grew up in upstate NY where I lived in a town with no sidewalks, split wood with my dad on the weekends, and helped build the house I spent my teen years in.
What I’m doing with my life
I am a Lead Video Specialist for a media distribution company. Basically I play with codecs and order other people to play with codecs. I hope you know what a codec is...
I work the 6pm - 3am shift so swipe left if you are not a night owl. I do not plan on doing it forever but it is my current situation and will help further my career. Midtown is surprisingly peaceful and well lit at 3am. It is nice at times but it can be lonely.
I’m really good at
I am a fast learner and problem solver/multi-tasker when it comes to tech/video/audio. When I was promoted to my supervisor position I was given a review and one part stated that I am a technological sponge. I am the go to guy at work for every question under the sun. When I sign in to my work email I usually have about 200 emails. I spend my first hour just going through them all, figuring out what has been dealt with and who is still waiting for solutions/answers. I can also play guitar and have written music for student/indie films.
The first things people usually notice about me
Hair maybe? I usually have some kind of crazy mad scientist thing going on. I really have no idea. In winter, my beard/face scruff. Summer... my face? If I am naked and facing them... my merkin. Facing away... my vestigial tail. I know I know, the urge to message this sexy creature is overwhelming.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Music- Nirvana, Minus The Bear, Circa Survive, Death Cab, Deftones, Radiohead, Tool, Brand New, Smashing Pumpkins, Sound of Animals Fighting, Mansions, Manchester Orchestra, NoFX, Modest Mouse, The Cure, Wildcat Wildcat, Moving Mountains, Jimmy Eat World, Appleseed Cast, Portishead.

Books- Anything by Pahlaniuk, Camus, Ellis, Burroughs, Proust, Tolstoy, Sedaris, Douglas Adams.

Food- Anything but fast food. Real ramen is a love of mine. (Not the 10 cents dried package stuff)

Movies- The Room, Sharknado, and other awful B-movies. Most Wes Anderson, P.T. Anderson, Coen Bros, Charlie Kaufman, Christopher Nolan, Tim Burton. Michael Bay type films make me sad.

TV- Walking Dead, GoT, SHIELD, Always Sunny, Last Man on Earth, Archer, Bobs Burgers, Dr Who, Sherlock, Family Guy, Portlandia, Kids In The Hall, Rick & Morty, Community, The Simpsons. I prefer the older seasons. Especially when Conan was the head writer. Season 5 has got to be the best one. I can't stand broad sitcoms like Everbody Loves Raymond. That title is a lie because I hate him.

Podcasts- Nerdist, WTF, The Bugle, Ricky Gervais. I have a couple ideas for podcasts that people have said sound really good, so bonus points if you are intetested in creating one with me.
The six things I could never do without
Vinyl Records
High Speed Internet
Coffee
My Guitar
Hoodies
And... crystal meth/sarcasm.... I guess.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Nonsense. I really think way too much for my own good. Its a double edged sword (2d8) <-------- Definitely message me if you understand the insides of those parenthesis.
On a typical Friday night I am
At work because of my late night shift. I try to meet up with people but usually they are plastered by then. I am not a big drinker too. Saturday is when I like to go out to play. Or maybe I will just relax at home while watching cartoons, playing music/records or at a concert. Burying hookers in a desert or a dessert (how else are you gonna make red velvet cake red?) Hipster watching. (That's when you guess if that scrungy looking dude is a hipster, pedophile, homeless or a combination)
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
OKC always throws a male profile at me in the quick match. What are they hinting at? I think they want me to switch teams. Just because I am a slim, clean bachelor in his 30s with very little body hair doesn't mean you have to assume such things. I mean there was college.... it was only experimenting.
You should message me if
If you understand the parenthesis in the earlier paragraph, but lets be honest... women want to be messaged, right? So lets do this. I do not want to message anyone who is not interested. It is a waste of both of our time. If I "like" you on this site just "like" me back and I will message you. I do not want to hear "I cannot see likes" because we all know there are simple ways to figure it out. The most obvious, one new visitor and one new like. They also put people who "like" you in quickmatch. Be prepared to read because I am not a one sentence guy. I am definitely not a "Sup?" or "Hey, *your* hot" kind of guy. If you are online I will send a simple question to see if we can live chat but if there is no response I will write a proper message. Then seal the deal with some amazingly creepy one-liner like, "Are you wearing astronaut pants? Because they make you look like a man in the Air Force" Or maybe some disturbing women/coffee metaphors like, "I like my women like I like my coffee, untouched by a hipster and with a spoon inside." Also I currently work the 6pm - 3am shift. So if you see that I am checking you out at 4am, I am not in some lonely drunken stalker mood. It is just my normal hours for now.
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