41Oakland, United States
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My self-summary
I am extroverted, fiercely loyal, and constantly curious.

I am always trying to build more community and I've spent the last few years figuring out who my people are. I'm finally finding them.

I am a geek. I love to learn new things and can become somewhat obsessive about new things I am learning.

I write poetry, fiction, and software. I cook, I dance, I hike, I travel. I try not to take myself or life too seriously, except when it matters to me or someone I care about.

I love science fiction, fantasy, gaming (Cheap Ass Games, Munchkin, D&D, you name it...), technology.

I think about ideas and strive to articulate my ideas in non-fiction journaling, talks, and even my fiction.

I am an optimist and a futurist. I believe humanity can overcome the stupidity that keeps us involved in war, oppression, and greed.

The closest things to a spiritual experience for me are:
* A cup of coffee with someone I love
* A quiet moment alone in the woods
* The sudden understanding of an idea that I didn't have before
What I’m doing with my life
I am employed as a software engineer - yes, we're a dime a dozen here in the Bay Area - but I'm one of the most social programmers I know, and so I hope to one day move into software management.

I'm working towards getting good enough at writing fiction that I can one day quit the software biz.

I'm fascinated by how the mind works and the complexities of human relationships. I've recently departed from a 9 year non-monogamous relationship, and I learned a lot about needs, security, communication, and love. My ex and I are still close and I am currently in an open marriage.

I've explored Non-violent Communication, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, mindfulness meditation, and a number of other models and practices for self brain-change.

I've spent many years trying to understand religion and spirituality by hanging around the local Pagan community. I was turned off at a young age by institutionalized religion (the big three), but I am respectful of any religious practice that is respectful of others.

I like to connect people. If I recognize a shared value, a sense of humor, or a similar taste in fine food between friends of mine, I encourage them to meet.
I’m really good at
Being social lubricant. Making people feel at ease enough to tell me their life stories. Loving unconditionally. Writing articulately. Cooking a delicious meal.
The first things people usually notice about me
That I'm very open and friendly. That I smile a lot. That I'm not very good at being Politically Correct. That I have no shame (I've been known to remove my clothes before anyone else at a party).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy - that series has more insight into humanity than almost any other book I've read.

Anything by Vernor Vinge, Gregory Benford, Neal Stephenson, Tom Robbins

In particular, A Fire Upon The Deep, The Galactic Center series, Snow Crash, Diamond Age, Anathem, Still Life With Woodpecker (the most romantic book of all time).

Prometheus Rising, Cosmic Trigger, Your Money or Your Life, Nonviolent Communication, What Should I Do With My Life? (Po Bronson)

Pump Up The Volume
The Secretary (the most romantic move of all time)
The Shawshank Redemption
The Ice Storm

Buffy The Vampire Slayer
Star Trek (Next Generation, Deep Space Nine)
Six Feet Under

I'm an omnivore and I like most food, but I am gaining a particular appreciation for vegetarian cooking.
Six things I could never do without
A strong community of friends
Regular exercise
Contributing to meaningful projects
Feeling financially secure
People & books to help me constantly learn new things
Regular adventures
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How to have more control over my own mind. How to give more power back to individual citizens. I have fantasies of helping to create a world where every neighborhood has their own community vegetable garden, their own industrial 3D printer, their own Internet network nodes, where there is far less central control of resources, preventing accumulations of power that can lead to corruption and a lack of interest in the needs of the people.

I think about how to change the way we think and act towards one another so that we might shake off the subtle and insidious Authoritarianism that drives even our most innocent interactions. Our culture is defined by power dynamics: I think about how we can retrain ourselves to think as equals and work towards win-win solutions, rather than assuming a zero-sum game - as NVC would put it - how can all parties get their needs met? I believe it's possible and I believe until we, as a species, learn to think that way, we will not achieve peace and lasting prosperity.

I think about how to use my writing to stimulate these ideas in people. How to make people think, the way others have made me think. How to seduce people to my vision where we are all resources for one another and making the world awesome starts with us.

I love the experiments Burning Man has allowed to happen: It's been a wonderful Petri Dish of culture (no pun intended, though I do love puns), encouraging people to think outside of our own stagnant culture.
On a typical Friday night I am
With my Writing Group, playing D&D, relaxing at home, at my friend's house concert.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
Behind the extroverted exterior, I can be really shy. I'm in a relationship right now, but she and I are both open to new romantic connections.
You should message me if
You read my profile and find anything that makes you excited about talking to me.

I love meeting new people and I'm open to getting to know you with no expectations about where things will go. Let's just hang out and see!
The two of us