lilyfish
30 Lancaster, United States
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lilyfish
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My self-summary
i am a human shaped creature, with a body AND a head.

i like stuff, but i'm also fond of things.

semi-seriously though: agender anarchist Arab, and oft-bewildered parent trying my best to navigate the murky waters of raising 2 larval humans as best i can.

i'm passionate about peaceful parenting & human development. i'm an intactivist and have been for 10 years. i find sexual selection a fascinating lens through which to view the modern world - i'm always trying to find some matter-of-fact root to explain human behavior (even if i fail more often than not). i love my kids, my pets, pop surrealist art that draws on natural themes and makes me feel inexplicably unsettled, coffee, cooking, creek stomping, and long discussions about social justice, the toxic nature of most cultural mores, politics, life philosophies, etc ... anything that makes me think. i like to consider myself woke, but of course, i still have plenty of work to do.

kink is important to me; i find it exhilarating and enthralling, and attend a monthly semi-local event for this purpose.

i'm just looking for friends right now. i am awkward and very bad at meatspace peopling, am mostly housebound w/my job and kids which makes it tough anyway, and don't drink very often, which makes the bar scene largely inaccessible to me.

i'm compassionate, anxious, awkward, avoidant, chronically ill, loyal, cynical, and ... idk. i'm just zees guy, you know? /hitchhiker's guide
What I’m doing with my life
beats me. trying to have fun. :-)

i am a fulltime breadwinner and fulltime parent, working online about 10 hours a day on top of staying at home with my kids ... so i'm generally pretty overwhelmed.
I’m really good at
giving people non-sexual physical intimacy without expectations, discussing things that people are not encouraged to openly discuss, gentle touch, cooking, typing, sensuality
The first things people usually notice about me
i don't really know, but i will say people are shocked when i tell them that i am shy. i guess it's just that initial 'hello' that's so difficult for me.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
humm. i'm particularly fond of tom robbins, jonathan carroll, john irving, robert heinlein, neil gaiman, barbara kingsolver; but i also loved the hunger games trilogy, the girl who ... trilogy, godslayer/banewreaker - a duo by jacqueline carey, chew, transmetropolitan, the invisibles, anything ed phillips & sean brubaker have done, ad tons of other stuff.

when it comes to non-fiction, mary roach, mark derr, and dr. sears are some of my favorites. also - maxime schwarz's "how the cows went mad," lt. col. dave grossman's "on killing: the psychological cost of learning to kill in war and society"; and "ghosts from the nursery: tracing the roots of violence" by robin karr-morse.

pan's labyrinth, four rooms, dead alive, noises off!, the in-laws, club dread, cabin in the woods, clue, dr. horrible's singalong blog, the emperor's new groove (shut up), etc.

shows ... sherlock, dexter, superjail!, squidbillies, doctor who, firefly, arrested development, it's always sunny in philadelphia, portlandia, supernatural, the increasingly poor decisions of todd margaret, home movies, whitest kids you know (hit or miss tho), mr show, ... etc.

music ... omg, really? too much. there are still genres i haven't been exposed to but i love music. fanfare ciocarlia, marchfourth marching band, and mclusky are my very very favorite bands, followed closely by future of the left. ummm. atmosphere, asylum street spankers, crooked still, sepultura, black keys, no means no, big black, blue highway, immortal technique... lots of stuff, i dunno!

i love food. all of it. indian, mexican, spanish, thai, ethiopian, vietnamese, the list goes on. as long as it's not an internal organ ... or bleu cheese (blech).

adding one for my own amusement, artists: jennybird alcantra, fuco ueda, greg simkins, caitlin hackett, edwin ushiro, michael hussar, so youn lee, madeline von foerster, amy sol, tara mcpherson, jean-pierre roy, trustocorp, camilla d'errico, josh keyes, bradley kunkle
The six things I could never do without
my children, warm sunlight on my skin (not for more than one winter, anyway), touch/closeness, pets, books, good people in my life.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
the future and how to make it an amazing one for my progeny.
On a typical Friday night I am
at home.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
that's creepy. wtf kind of question is that, okcupid?
You should message me if
you enjoyed reading this, and think we would get along.

you want to talk about life, the universe, and everything.

you are a regular attendee of the aviary in illadelphia.

you love high energy brass music, especially Balkan brass music, and want to go to M4 or fanfare ciocarlia shows with me for awkward dancing.

you have zero expectations. and no, that is not code for "you want NSA sex." not interested. if that's what you're looking for, please go away.
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