33Brighton, United States
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My self-summary
UPDATE DECEMBER 2016: a quality burrito place finally opened up in my neighborhood. This is so beyond game-changing for me. I've gone nearly 7 years having to travel at least a mile for good burritos, now it's only a block away. (Yes this belongs in my self-summary.) At least once a year I would give the "other" burrito place a try knowing full well it was going to be utter disappointment. I'd tell myself "maybe you just ordered the wrong thing, give them another shot". I was constantly let down, but those days are over finally. Thank you new burrito place, you are legit one the only bright spots in the unmitigated disaster known as the year of 2016.

Hello beautiful eyes. Do you mind if I party with you?

I'm having a good time. I hate writing about myself because it feels like i'm bragging. I'm going to try anyway, since it is the point of this box. I have a bi-coastal reputation as a food finisher.

I get nervous really easy when people are doing stupid things. A good example is trying to rap or do standup. I get weirded out and want to remove myself from the situation. You know what i mean. All my friends hate me now, I'm pretty sure...

I'm one of those people who honestly just doesn't get along with everyone. Some people i just click with and we become instant bffs. Others find me aloof and uncaring. They probably just don't get "it".

I used to be with it, but then they changed what "it" was. Now, what I'm with isn't it, and what's "it" seems weird and scary to me.

Flanders sucks. Flanders sucks. Flanders sucks.Flanders sucks. Flanders sucks. Flanders sucks.
What I’m doing with my life
One time I convinced a woman I work with I was dating Casey Anthony. I'm really proud of that day.

anyway, this cake is great. it's so delicious and moist.

I am going to watch every episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation by the end of the summer. Yes, even the annoying Wesley Crusher-centric ones. Does this make me nerdy? I tend to think not, since a nerd would have already watched them all. Checkmate atheists, god is real.
I’m really good at
Scuba driving. Making myself laugh. Not making others laugh.
Making PB&J (strawberry jam plz). Reading wikipedia.
The first things people usually notice about me
often i hear: "I think kevin is a pretty cool guy, he tells bad stories and doesnt afraid of anything."
which is 100% true.

damn. now you know my name.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I really like Mitch Hedberg.

I lurve seafood, the beatles, waynes world 1&2 and TV guide while drinking an RC soda.

oysters are my favorite.

A$AP Rocky and Kendrick. Hot Chip. Portugal. Beach House. Lana.King Tuff. Kurt Vile. La Luz. New music that sounds like it's from the 80's. Good grooves mostly.
Six things I could never do without
1. Bordeaux
2. Meta-humor
4. Early to mid 90's Female R&B groups (EN VOGUE)
5. Blue or Pink or Green or interchangeable sunglasses
6. Lulz
I spend a lot of time thinking about
'Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels' -"cocaine" Kate Moss
On a typical Friday night I am
Living a Hulkamania life.

I know this doesn't belong in this section, but I don't care.

i can't stand when people say the Beatles are overrated. its impossible to overrate the Beatles. if there is any *blank*-rating to be done, its underrating the Beatles. even if you like the Beatles and respect what they did/do, you probably are still underrating them.

that's all. sorry.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called "City Fathers" who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about "What's to be done with this Kevin on okCupid?"
You should message me if
you want to go to see foxygen and have fun 70% of the time.
The two of us