I was recently visiting my hometown, Indianapolis. Family Reunion. Haven't been back since I was a young man.
As an Oaklander, I'm always curious to see if 'there is something there', something I've been missing.
Hmmm, maybe your can't go home.
I am a single black guy from SoCal, who much prefers life in the bay area (I miss the heat though).
The most interesting shift I've noticied in getting older is that, as I find my place in the world (and believe me, I am still searching), the world seems to respond to me better.
Somehow I've been making my living doing what I love, mostly in the area of theater. And when I grow up I want to be... -well that answer hasn't changed since I was little: Happy.
Now, if I can just figure out what that means... I think it includes having a strong sense of community, feeling connected to those around me, and feeling that what I do has an impact on my community.
I am art-minded, adventuresome, and analytical
I am also good at figure modelling. While I am no body-builder, I also get lots of flattering comments on my body ("are a dancer?" is the most common question).
I have also found I can organize and manage things when I am inspired (like producing plays), encompassing a range of skills that I never imagined I had, until I actually did it (then did it again and again).
I like to play and I like things being fair. That includes games board games, card games, dominoes (or Rummikube), word games like Scrabble (but not their dictionary) and Boggle, childhood games like hide-n-go-seek, tag... seems like I can't get around dogs (or cats) or kids without getting goofy.
I also have a calm energy, which seem to exude something people often see as the guy in charge/who knows what's going on. Usually I like that, though I am often mystified by it
Film: I enjoy a good movie (e.g. Wim Wenders, Kurosawa, "2001" Diva), but generally have shifted toward spending my time 'doing' rather than spectating.
I generally avoid TV, but I grew up loving cartoons and can still find them charming (from Sponge Bob to Robot Chicken, yay!).
Music: Rock and Roll 50s,60s, 70s, 80s and beyond, from the early Rockabilly Roy Orbison-Little Richard-Buddy Holly, through the Folk movement and into Psychedelia (Heavy Metal --not so much), with a dab of New Age, a little jazz, a little soul (a smidgen of R&B)...
I should mention I minored in Choral music, grew up with choirs as my main exposure to Classical music. While I don't keep up with it much, to this day a Mass or Requiem can take me somewhere, and I've always loved things like Aaron Copeland, DeBussy, and Satie.
Before karaoke took over my musical tastes --read into that what you will-- I loved (and still do) Beatles, Stevie Wonder & Motown, Joni Mitchell, Simon & Garfunkel, Pink Floyd, David Bowie, Joan Armatrading... lots of singer/writers -some of whom unfortunately don't appear much on karaoke lists. The edges of my musical awareness encompass Philip Glass, Steven Reich, Charlie Parker, Cranberries, Leonard Cohen, Rufus Wainwright.
Thanks to karaoke that list includes: Red Hot Chili Peppers, Foo Fighters, Radiohead, Coldplay and most recently Kings of Leon, Adele & Amy Winehouse and more and more...
Food) Omnivore. Not really a steak guy, not a total health food nut. The food experience that may best define me occured when I was being introduced to sushi. I started to ask what something was, and was told to try it first, then ask. I found I enjoy many things, like eel unagi, that I may not have, had I started with a mental image rather than a taste.
That said, I try to limit sugar consumption, am sort of lactose-intolerant and, being a slim person with low blood pressure, rarely worry about calories or fat content. I've been known for making killer oatmeal.
Bacon (maybe I could, but it would be a sacrifice).
Spirituality (want something reflecting a world I recognize. Did I mention I am former-Catholic?)... Getting older, and ways to do it gracefully.
SEX! I'm a Libra, so I struggle to find balance. I want both the immediate comfort of cuddling and all that (at my age it seems silly to save it for marriage), AND I want a relationship that will grow for a lifetime.
And hoping I might bump into you. Its ironic for an actor, but I can get a little shy. So don't be afraid to be obvious. I might miss our chance while I'm trying to avoid being another obnoxious guy bugging you :)
NEW ONE: My all-time favorite tv show was probably The Waltons, and it probably shaped a lot of my notions of family, spirit, and many things good about America (ehh, did I just admit that?)
re: 'woman of my dreams' ...I would love you to be intelligent (college-educated is nice, but I know plenty of intelligent women who aren't).
-A woman of color would be nice, but they don't have a monopoly on understanding issues of race in America, do they? (…maybe just a good head start)
-And while I may notice how cute your permed/relaxed/tinted/highlighted hair is, there is something I deeply love about well-groomed, natural textures.
-Old or young, tall or short, lanky or 'petite', it is all relative, isn't it? Who cares? A few extra pounds, fine (and I love some nice curves!). I prefer someone not dealing with serious weight issues, both because I am not, and beyond a certain point it just isn't healthy.
How well do we get along and bring out the best in each other, THAT'S what I most want to know...
NOTE ON CHILDREN: I sometimes hate the limited answers of the survey, knowing folks will take them at face value. So yeah, I like kids and -like many of you- want to have them (or maybe you wanted to and did). BUT I'm at a point in life where many female peers are past childbearing age.
So if I have to choose between being with someone who can share my history OR someone to have babies. --guess what? I want SOMEONE TO LOVE. I don't care which way it goes, as long as I get that.
So please don't assume (dangerous word that) kids are a requirement for me. I WANT YOU. If you want to have kids, great; if you already had 'em, maybe I'll get to skip to grandparenting with you. If you don't want 'em... so?
My struggle is finding a woman who is not afraid to get close, yet takes the time to get past any initial giddiness. Let's really get to know each other before trying to map out our future together. TRUST ME, I want it too. But I want to be sure it is great, not just 'good enough'
So if you're willing to have fun, maybe even explore new territory... I promise I am not just looking for a fling. Let's chat.