FL --> CA --> DC --> NY --> BCN --> back to NY
(Headed to Seoul & Tokyo next month for a few weeks, so if you have any ProTips for either of those places, holla & we can be friends.)
(insta: sharonmariem fyi fwiw)
(yes, I know my dumb inbox on here gets full sometimes. I would say I'm sorry but if I were --actually-- sorry I might care enough to clean it out more often. I don't. Just hit me up on instagram or something idk. let's be honest, this is all just an extended exercise in futility anyway. DON'T YOU WANNA GET TO KNOW ME?? ARENT I JUST THE RAY OF SUNSHINE YOU'VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR??)
(* I don't actually watch baseball. [insert that one gif of Marilyn Manson being like "don't talk to me about sports." you know the one. yeah, that one.] )
"i would say you are a total weirdo but i'm sure you've heard it so often in life that it doesn't even phase you anymore." - okc user itsarainyday (for a firsthand account of what it's like to date me, contact the aforementioned gentleman.)
**edit: he went and got himself a gf, so in the meantime you can solicit denman138 for insider information & sex protips.
*** edit edit: ALL MY EXES HAVE NEW GIRLFRIENDS NOW EXCUSE ME WHILE I STARE OFF INTO MIDDLE DISTANCE AND RUMINATE ON THE INCREASING LIKELIHOOD THAT I WILL DIE VERY MUCH ALONE. I DONT KNOW WHERE YOU CAN GO FOR SEX TIPS ANYMORE SORRY, WE ARE ALL DOOMED.
i probably don't want to sleep with you. UNLESS YOU HAVE LONG HAIR. STOP MESSAGING ME WITH YOUR STUPID SHORT HAIR. JESUS. STOP IT.
I slowly keep adding things to my okcupid profile that make me seem less and less desirable to the general public, and I'm not sure why. It's a vetting process, I guess. I hate everyone.
those are mutually inclusive requirements.
(also: if you have long hair, a neck tattoo, are taller than me, and are into comic books.)
(also also: if you are a creepy weirdo. for real.)
(also also also: I know this whole profile is sort of a big whatever joke but for what it's worth I tend to prefer: 1) creatives 2) academics 3) intellectuals 4) woke ass individuals 5) feminists who don't feel the need to broadcast what a good feminist they are for the sake of getting praise (this one applies only to cishet men; sorry, but you don't get an award for being a base-line decent person) but also feminists who are ready to go to fuckin' battle for the cause and aren't afraid to speak the hell up about it (this one pertains to everyone who isn't cishet&male) 6) ectomorphs 7) total nerds, and all of those things failing, yeah, get at me with your long hair & neck tattoos, that part is not a joke)
...and if you don't mind that our first date will probably go like this: http://vimeo.com/29328331 (with me being Rich Fulcher - THERE IS A REASON I AM SINGLE, PEOPLE.)